Secrets Kept
by MetalPrincess13
Summary: Secrets can eat you up from the inside, especially ones dealing with sexuality and relationships. Tracey is the only one that knows Gary’s secret, mostly because he’s part of it. Prequel to Secrets Told.
1. Prologue

**Secrets Kept**

Summary: Secrets can eat you up from the inside, especially ones dealing with sexuality and relationships. Tracey is the only one that knows Gary's secret, mostly because he's part of it. This is the promised prequel to _Secrets Told_.

Rated T for safety for the moment, will probably change at some point.

Disclaimer – I own the storyline, the OCs, my interpretation of the characters, and nothing else.

Prologue

--- --- ---

_A small laugh escaped Tracey as he found himself suddenly pushed against the wall behind him, his boyfriend's lips pressed against his own a split second later, cutting off that joyful laugh. Fighting down another laugh, Tracey rested his hands against Gary's chest and returned the kiss before playfully pushing the younger boy away from him._

"_Playful today, aren't we?" he teased lightly, taking delight in the smirk his words elicited._

"_Depends on what you mean by 'playful,'" Gary replied, resting his hands on Tracey's hips and leaning in for another kiss as he did so._

"_You're not afraid of your sister catching us?" Tracey turned his head slightly to avoid his inquiry being cut off by his boyfriend's lips; the resulting disappointment on Gary's face was apparent._

"_She's in the pool with her friends," he replied exasperatedly, once more leaning in to kiss Tracey, who once more turned his head._

"_She almost caught us last week –"_

"_Trace." He stopped mid-sentence as Gary's voice interrupted him gently; staring up into those dark brown eyes, he could feel his apprehension fading. "May isn't going to catch us; stop worrying." With that, he pressed his lips firmly against Tracey's, kissing him fiercely and effectively cutting off the half-hearted protest._

_A small grin curved his lips as Tracey appeared slightly dazed from the kiss. Regardless of being kissed senseless by his stubborn boyfriend, Tracey wasn't entirely deterred. This relationship had been kept a secret for well over a year, purely because of Gary's insecurities, and he wasn't about to have it uncovered now by the boy being careless and deciding to make out with the bedroom door open and his sister and her big-mouthed friends hanging out in the house. Granted, he had told Gary time and time again that they would both be happier without this massive secret weighing down on them, but he wasn't about to have everyone find out by May walking in on them and blurting it out to everyone._

_He was determined to have Gary actually tell his grandfather and sister about this personally – it didn't seem fair to their relationship to have someone simply walk in on them. Keeping a serious relationship secret was no easy task and Gary certainly owed it to him to actually tell the people closest to them. _

_His determination was obvious and Gary sighed, understanding where this was going. "So much for our plans, huh?" he scoffed slightly. _

_Tracey watched a bit sadly as Gary turned and started to leave the room. Feeling terrible for killing the mood, he quickly followed, gently pushing Gary against the wall in the hallway just outside his bedroom. "Come on, Gary," he said softly. "You know I didn't mean to kill the mood. It's just that if you're so dead set on us keeping this a secret then you can't be so casual about it. Sooner or later everyone is going to have to find out, I'd rather it be because you told them when you were ready rather than because we were caught." A small sigh of his own escaped him as he noticed the closed-off expression on Gary's face. The boy always seemed to shut down whenever they talked about this particular subject._

"_We've talked about this before," Gary replied quietly, not bothering to elaborate on this subject as his tone accurately described how he felt about it. Tracey already knew his stance on the topic as they had discussed it more than once over the years of their friendship and then the year and a half of their relationship. Coming out was not an option at this particular point in time – maybe he would do it soon, he certainly _was_ frustrated with keeping quiet about it, but right now, no. _

_Right now, he was more focused on spending time with his friends while they were all in town for the summer before everyone started leaving Pallet for good. Coming out would certainly affect at least some of their relationships with him and the last thing he wanted to do now was ruin his summer by doing something that would negatively affect his relationships with his closest friends._

"_I know, Gary; and that's all I'm saying about it." Tracey leaned forward and pressed a small, chaste kiss against Gary's lips, purely for the purpose of calming him down. He moved his hands to his boyfriend's shoulders, gently rubbing them, trying to ease the tension out of the boy._

_Slowly, Gary relaxed, returning the kiss as he gently cupped Tracey's face in his hands. Tracey pulled away slightly and brushed his nose against Gary's with a small smile. _

"_I love you," he whispered, allowing his hands to slide down Gary's body until they rested on his hips, the tips of his fingers barely slipping under his t-shirt to rest on his bare flesh. _

_The feeling of Tracey's hands touching his stomach, even slightly, seemed to calm Gary even more as his hands moved to Tracey's shoulders and then to his back, where one hand slowly trailed up and down his spine. "I love you, too," he replied softly, resting his head against Tracey's shoulder after a short moment. "I swear, Tracey, when summer's over-"_

"_Whenever you're ready – " A sudden squeal cut him off just when he was about to remind Gary that the professor's attitude toward him hadn't changed at all when Tracey had admitted that he was, in fact, gay. Gary's entire body tensed and Tracey felt a sinking feeling in his stomach as May Oak's cheerful and excited voice spoke up from further down the hall. Despite all their work, the secret had been blown in the second that it took May to see them together and understand what it all meant. _

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	2. Chapter 1

**Secrets Kept**

Last chapter was a flashback, happening just before the beginning of _Secret's Told_, hence all of the italics. From now on, any _italics_ are thoughts of the characters, unless otherwise stated. I'm sorry for this chapter being a bit slow, by the way.

Chapter One

The town was the same as ever, with it's dusty roads, grassy hills, and picket fences surrounding homes that all seemed to look so much alike – a picturesque scene of an upper-middle class small town in the middle of nowhere. For the sixteen-year-old, driving along the roads in his Jeep with his Umbreon by his side, it was both nauseating and exhilarating. It was good to be home again, especially after being gone for so long.

Now finished with his work at the Sayda Research Institute, Gary was back in Pallet for good, at least for a little while. He intended to continue working towards becoming a researcher by going to college but, unfortunately, that meant he had to actually do a few years of high school, leaving him stuck in Pallet Town. At least he would be able to work in his grandfather's lab and gain more experience, he figured, but being stuck in one place for such a long time was not something that appealed to him.

Umbreon let out a sudden, excited bark as Gary pulled into the driveway at the lab, causing her trainer to jump slightly and nearly run over the mailbox. She wagged her tail excitedly despite the curse and scold that her enthusiasm elicited, pawing at the door until the car came to a stop in front of the garage. "Would you chill out?" Gary snapped irritably, already exhausted from the drive home and not entirely willing to deal with his polemon's extreme excitement. Umbreon didn't seem to mind the scold; after all, she had grown used to Gary's moodiness whenever he was tired.

Within a few moments, they were both inside the house with Gary's belongings dropped off at the front door. The house was quiet, leaving Gary feeling a bit annoyed as his sister and grandfather had been annoying him for the past several weeks to hurry up and come home as soon as possible – sooner if he could manage. The fact that they weren't even in the house to greet him irritated him a bit, but he could deal with it. With a sigh and a glance down at his pokemon, Gary headed off in the direction of the lab, certain he would be able to at least find his grandfather there.

Sure enough, he found Professor Oak in the laboratory looking over a report while Tracey worked on his computer in a distant corner of the large room. As Gary entered the room, Umbreon immediately ran up to the professor with her tail wagging, begging for attention. Gary couldn't help but laugh and roll his eyes a bit; the canine had obviously missed the older man who kneeled down to greet her before looking up at his grandson as the boy meandered over.

"I wasn't expecting you until Friday, Gary," he said, sounding a bit surprised to see the teen.

"It _is_ Friday," Gary pointed out.

"Ah… Oh, that means the grass pokemon need their physicals today –"

"I already did it, Professor," Tracey interjected, finally removing his attention from the computer as he stood and approached the other two people in the lab. He and Gary shared a knowing smile – they both knew all too well how easily the professor could lose track of time while doing his research.

The professor shook his head. "See what you have to live up to here, Gary?" he teased.

Gary grinned, shooting Tracey a casual glance. "I'm up to the challenge," he replied with a small shrug of his shoulders.

Tracey laughed and Gary felt his stomach tighten at the sound; the older boy was cute when he laughed. _Don't start with that shit_, Gary mentally scolded himself, quickly suppressing the thought.

"Let's see who can win," Tracey began, his voice light and playful. "The spoiled grandson or the experienced assistant."

"I'm not spoiled –"

"Keep telling yourself that, Gary; Tracey, why don't you help him bring his stuff upstairs while I finish up in here?" the professor cut Gary off before he could finish.

Gary started to say that Tracey didn't have to do that but was once more cut off when the professor insisted and Tracey declared that it wasn't a problem before leading him out of the lab and back into the hallway.

_This could take some getting used to_…

--- --- ---

Looking around his old bedroom, Gary was reminded of the fact that he hadn't visited home in well over a year and that he hadn't actually lived there for nearly six. The room was going to have to undergo some serious changes as it was still fit for a child of ten who dreamed of being a top pokemon trainer, not a sixteen-year-old whose dreams and interests had changed over the years.

"Just the way you left it," Tracey's cheerful voice interrupted his thoughts.

Gary turned to see the other boy enter the room behind him, placing his armful of bags next to the door where Gary had left the others. "Yeah," he agreed; the room had indeed stayed exactly the same. "I kind of wish it wasn't though." Tracey gave him an odd glance and, for a moment, Gary thought he was going to comment on his negativity – it was what his grandfather would have done in the same situation.

Tracey merely nodded as he peered around the room. "Well, you _have_ changed a lot since I first met you. It would only make sense to want the room to change as well," he said reasonably.

_Nice to see Ash's insanity hasn't worn off on him. _"Try telling that to my grandfather," Gary sighed softly. He knew quite well that it would take a lot of bargaining to get the older man to let him change the room. When he was younger, the room had changed constantly; they were forever painting walls or changing bed spreads and, invariably, something always ended up broken or ripped or paint ended up where it wasn't supposed to be and the Professor eventually made it a rule that there would be no more changes. That had been eight years earlier and if Gary knew anything about his grandfather, it was that he kept his word on everything, including bedrooms.

"I could help you with that."

"Really now?" Gary was doubtful, to say the least, but Tracey nodded again. "Do you have any idea how stubborn my grandfather is?"

A smile curved Tracey's lips as he looked back at the younger teen; Gary would have to learn sooner or later that the pokemon watcher knew the professor nearly as well as his grandson did by now. "Of course I do." He tilted his head to the side and considered the boy for a moment before smiling again. "The question is, are you as stubborn as him?"

Something in his smile caused Gary's insides to flip. Did Tracey sense that there was something less obvious that set him apart from Ash and the other male friends that Tracey had? Better yet, did he sense that there was a deep similarity between the two of them that no one knew about? Gary shook his head slightly, pushing aside those thoughts as he crossed his arms and smirked. "Worse," he admitted. 

_If you think Grandpa's bad…_ his thoughts trailed off as Tracey's smile faded a bit.

"That can be a double-edged sword, you know," he said quietly. "I'll go talk to your grandfather while you settle in." With that, Tracey left the room, leaving Gary to lean in the doorway and watch him head down the hall. It took him a moment to realize where exactly his gaze had landed on the young pokemon watcher and he groaned when he did so, reaching up to rub his temples.

_Enough!_ Gary scolded himself with a guilty glance at his bags that had yet to be unpacked. _You have work to do…_

He set to work on unpacking his bags and putting everything away in its proper place, all the while trying to make the room look more as though it reflected his current state of maturity. At the same time, half-formed thoughts circulated the back of his mind, bringing up old memories of his former rival that he quickly suppressed.

_Remember why you stopped being friends with him_, a voice in the back of his head sneered. Yet another thought suppressed. He didn't have time to think about the old friendship he and Ash had once shared.

--- --- ---


	3. Chapter 2

**Secrets Kept**

Thanks to Defiant Vixen for reviewing this story and thanks also to her and licoricejellybean for reviewing the final chapters of _Secrets Told_. I do believe I forgot to thank everyone who reviewed the final chapter of _Evolution_: if any of you happen to be reading this – thanks so much!

You guys might remember that _Secrets Told_ had some slight one-sided Palletshipping; it returns here. I'm not sure how much of it will be in here since Gary says in the other fic that he stopped liking Ash after they competed in the Silver Conference… Anyway, just sayin'. The chapters should be getting a bit longer and more interesting after the next one.

Chapter Two

The bedroom looked so utterly different than it had a mere week ago, Gary realized rather suddenly as he stepped away from the wall with a small yawn. He tossed his paint roller down on the plastic sheet covering the floor and stretched lithely, sparing a glance over at Tracey as he heard a soft laugh from the other side of the room.

"Bored already?" the other boy asked, turning just enough to shoot his friend a grin before returning his attention to the job at hand.

Gary shook his head as he knelt next to the small stereo in the middle of the room to change the cd that had just ended. "The smell of paint makes me sick," he explained. Somehow – Gary wasn't quite sure exactly how – Tracey had talked the professor into letting his grandson paint the room and get new furniture. Gary had a suspicion that it had something to do with the older man wanting to have new carpets put into all of the bedrooms, but he wasn't about to be picky. He stole a glance at Tracey as the pokemon watcher stepped back and critically examined the spot he had just painted several times over.

"A bit OCD?" Gary asked, quirking an eyebrow.

Another laugh escaped Tracey and Gary couldn't help but smile – he, for some inexplicable reason, enjoyed making him laugh.

"Nah, I'm an _artiste_," Tracey replied in a false French accept with a flourish of his paint brush.

Gary snorted at the ridiculous action. "Gay as well?" he joked, plopping down on the floor next to the radio. The flamboyant flourish certainly fit the stereotype… _Not everyone fits the stereotype, genius_, the voice in the back of his mind sneered. Of course, Gary ignored the voice; his conscience was far too talkative. He lay down on the floor with a soft chuckle; the paint fumes were starting to give him a migraine.

An unreadable smile curved Tracey's lips as he looked back at the younger teen once more, whom he considered with interest. "You're perceptive," he finally said a moment later, turning back to the wall again. "Most people don't pick up that so quickly."

Suddenly feeling a bit bad about the tactless joke, Gary sat up slowly. "I was just kidding about that," he quickly defended. He hoped that he hadn't offended Tracey; the other teen didn't _seem_ offended in any way. If anything, Tracey appeared mildly amused as he glanced back at Gary.

"I wasn't," Tracey replied with a shrug. Gary remained silent and Tracey turned a moment later to give him a curious look; he certainly wasn't used to the younger boy being quiet, even though they had become friends nearly three years ago, only a short while after Tracey had come to live in Pallet Town. He had his suspicions, not that they were at all obvious, or even well-founded, for that matter. But a suspicion was a suspicion and Tracey had watched Gary interact with his sister's friends enough in the week to have his interest sparked.

"It's good that you're so perceptive," he continued, setting down his paint brush. He leaned against an unpainted part of the wall and casually crossed his arms over his chest, mimicking a stance that Gary often took. Judging by the small smirk that appeared on Gary's face, Tracey guessed that he recognized the stance. "You need to be perceptive to be a good researcher. Of course, sometimes it's more than just being perceptive that makes us notice things. I'll go get more paint."

Gary watched as Tracey left the room, suddenly confused. He groaned and slumped back against the carpet, refusing to allow his mind to begin dissecting the possible meanings behind Tracey's last comment. It wouldn't do any good to look into the meaning; Tracey was simply commenting on the fact that Gary was perceptive, it didn't mean anything. Everyone knew that he was perceptive – it had gotten him into all sorts of trouble as a child, to the point that his grandfather had forced him into piano lessons just to ensure that there were a few hours out of the week when he _couldn't_ get into trouble. Not that it had necessarily helped.

He lay there on the floor for several long minutes, carefully keeping his mind blank to avoid thinking anything that a perfectly normal, _straight_ sixteen-year-old wouldn't think. Despite his attempts to keep a blank mind, half-formed thoughts kept coming up, some involving Tracey, some involving just himself.

_You can't lie to yourself forever…_

It was at that moment that Professor Oak chose to enter the room, crossing his arms and shaking his head when he saw Gary laying on the floor. "I know you like to be stubborn, but opening the windows really would help with the fumes," he chastised in a light tone. He crossed the room and opened the windows, hoping to air out the room at least a little bit; it was no wonder Tracey had come downstairs for a break.

Gary ignored him, keeping his gaze on the ceiling, trying to distract himself from the last thought with memories. The ceiling in his room was black with small stars painted on it; a project that had been done when he was only eight and he'd had a fascination with the night sky. It had taken a long time to complete but it had been worth it back then. Looking back it was worth it just for the memories of the nights when his friends had spent the night just so that they could work for an hour, get a tiny amount of work done, and spend the rest of the night watching movies and eating pizza. Unfortunately those little slumber parties ended up one person short towards the end of the project…

The other boys had questioned Ash's absence but Gary simply couldn't tell him why he suddenly wanted nothing to do with his best friend.

He could so vividly recall Ash's laughing face as they splattered each other with paint – so much of the substance always seemed to end up in places other than where it was supposed to go. Ash had playfully pushed him, leading to a short-lived wrestling match that Ash had won with the help of one of the other boys – the one who had taken Ash's spot as Gary's best friend and still remained his closest friend to this day. The light had hit Ash the right way, the way it always hit him when they played outside, and Gary had noticed how cute the boy was. It wasn't the first time he had noticed, it was more likely the hundredth time, but it was the first time he had realized the implications.

_Cute…_ It was the word the other boys used to describe the girls in their school. It _couldn't_ describe Ash, not for Gary at least; a girl could think Ash was cute, but _not_ another boy. It wasn't right, it didn't make sense. Animals needed to make babies in life and so did people because they were a type of animal. To do that, you needed a boy and a girl. That train of thought had made sense to Gary even as a child; he was, indeed, perceptive. Two boys couldn't make a baby, neither could two girls. That was why it didn't work.

Confusion had washed over him in that instant as an eight-year-old, and he had viciously shoved Ash off of him when the smaller boy leaned over him to tease him for losing. Despite being shoved, Ash had smiled and held out his hand to help Gary up, a gesture that was irritably batted away. The confusion never left Gary that night and he took it out on Ash. That night's sleepover had ended early; Ash eventually got upset and went home in tears, Professor Oak had driven the other boys home, and then Gary had gotten a long lecture about how to treat others. Incidentally, that was also the night the professor had made the rule that there would be no more changes made to the bedrooms in the house.

Gary sighed and closed his eyes, coming back to the present as his grandfather appeared over him. The professor asked if he was alright and Gary nodded slowly in response as he opened his eyes to stare up at the ceiling again. Professor Oak smiled, suggested that the teen get some fresh air, and then turned to leave the room.

"Can we paint the ceiling?" Gary asked suddenly, just as the professor was entering the hallway beyond the doorway.

Slowly, the professor came back into the room, frowning in confusion. The question had been unexpected, especially since Gary hadn't said a word in the time that he had been in the room – something he attributed to the paint fumes in the room as they had always made the boy feel ill. "Do you have any idea how much paint it would take to cover the black, Gary?" he asked after a moment of recovery.

Gary frowned, easily recognizing the answer as being a definite 'no'. "We could just paint over the stars…" he murmured, more to himself than to his grandfather. He didn't want memories of the time spent painting it to haunt him. Not with the way so many strange thoughts had begun to circulate his head since his arrival home.

"Gary," Professor Oak began firmly. "The paint is making you delusional, go outside and get some air."

Reluctantly, Gary forced himself to his feet, partially glad to have an excuse to stop staring at the accursed ceiling and its painted stars. A brief second of thought caused him to head towards the dresser that had been pushed to the center of the room rather than to the door. Perhaps seeing his best friend would make him feel better, he decided as he grabbed his keys from the top of the piece of furniture.

"I'm going to Darren's," he explained flatly to his grandfather.

He started to leave the room but was stopped when the professor plucked the keys from his hand, removed his car key from the clip, and handed it back to him with just the house key remaining in its place. "Walk. Get some air or you'll have a migraine for a week."

Gary rolled his eyes but slipped the house key in his pocket and headed down the hallway, muttering something under his breath about his grandfather being a pain. The professor shook his head without taking the bait; teens would be teens, he figured. What point was there in chastising the boy for being irritated?

--- --- ---


	4. Chapter 3

**Secrets Kept**

Thanks to Defiant Vixen for reviewing!

A few OCs introduced in here… There won't be many, I swear. The chapters are going to be longer from now on and more should be happening in them since there's a lot to cover in this fic and I don't want this to be as long as _Beyond the Walls_. Enjoy!

Chapter Three

Tracey had never been one for parties or even large groups of people, not even back home in the Orange Islands. It had taken him a few years to get used to the way the Professor's granddaughter would throw parties whenever he was out of town and, once more, he found himself a bit uncomfortable and out of his depth. Predictably, May Oak, in all of her excitable splendor, had chosen to throw a party for her younger brother's homecoming during the professor's first trip out of town – when Gary had already been home for nearly a month. Only a few people were at the house currently and Tracey found himself in the kitchen doodling on a spare sheet of paper while May and one of her friends gossiped and giggled as they set up drinks and food.

Tracey glanced up from the Lapras sketch that he was working on as Gary entered the room, closely followed by a boy with long dark hair. Smiling his greeting at the two boys, Tracey easily recognized the other teen as Gary's best friend, Darren, who often helped out in the lab during the summer months. He had initially been surprised to find out that the two were such good friends, given how energetic and mischievous Darren was in contrast with Gary's rather laidback persona, but he had passed off this surprise quickly – after all, quiet as he was, Tracey _was_ friends hyper, happy-go-lucky Ash. Whoever said opposites couldn't attract or, at the very least, be friends?

Languidly crossing the kitchen, Gary leaned against the counter next to his sister and peered at the many bottles lined up before shaking his head. "How do you manage to get so much alcohol when you're underage?" he asked her curiously.

"That's for me to know and you to find out," May replied, tossing her dyed blonde hair over her shoulder with a grin.

Gary frowned slightly, eying the bottles again. "Grandpa's going to be pissed if he finds out about this, May," he pointed out quietly. Tracey couldn't help but be mildly surprised at his words; he had been rather under the impression that Gary didn't care too much about getting into trouble. The boy was constantly getting into some sort of trouble in the lab and didn't seem too bothered by any consequences that came his way. Perhaps he cared more about the rule regarding alcohol in the house considering the professor was rather strict about that particular rule. May and her friend laughed and May shook her head, taking the opportunity to pick on her brother while Tracey turned his attention to his Marril, who had just jumped up on the table. "Fine," Gary replied crisply, crossing his arms in response to the playful teasing. "Don't bitch to me if he finds out."

May opened one of the many bottles on the counter and poured a liberal amount into a plastic cup, which she passed to Gary. "Drink this and stop worrying, Squirt."

Gary sniffed the drink warily, pulling a face and handing it back to his sister. "No thanks."

"So innocent," May laughed, offering Darren the drink that Gary had refused. The other boy took it with no complaint, shooting his friend a grin while Gary's frown deepened slightly.

"Whatever," Gary muttered with a scowl. He turned and left the room through the back door; Tracey glanced up to watch through the open door as Darren hurried to follow him across the backyard.

A soft sigh brought Tracey's attention back to the kitchen as May sat down in one of the empty seats at the table. "He been acting weird lately," she announced to no one in particular, a worried expression settling across her features.

"How so?" he asked, mildly surprised. He didn't know Gary too well but they had been friends for awhile and whatever it was that May had noticed had passed by him unseen; something unusual considering the pokemon watcher tended to pick up on human emotions just from seeing their mannerisms.

"I don't know…" May frowned, thinking for a moment. "He's tense, like something's on his mind," she explained.

Tracey shrugged slightly, not really knowing what to say. "I haven't noticed," he admitted.

May gave him a small smile. "You don't know him well enough." Her friend, who had been standing next to the counter during the exchange, came over and sat down in one of the remaining chairs, looking interested.

"Maybe he needs a girl," she suggested with a suggestive smile.

"Of course you'd be the one to bring that up," May sighed. "In case you haven't noticed, he doesn't seem to be very interested in girls."

Tracey glanced up from his drawing again, his attention captured as May's friend scoffed quietly. "Oh, come on," she said with a dramatic roll of her eyes. "He flirts back _all_ the time," she pushed on as though it explained everything.

Looking back down at his sketchbook, Tracey tried to hide a frown. May's friend was right – to an extent. He had seen Gary's responses to the way his sister's friends fawned over him, flirted with him, and all but threw themselves at him. Yes, he flirted back and there were times when he seemed to genuinely enjoy the company of the pretty girls, but it always seemed to be in a more innocent way than most hormone-charged boys his age normally would. Then there were times when he smiles wouldn't reach his eyes and he would simply brush off the attention in favor of a book or video game. Another small sigh from May brought his attention back to the conversation, though he kept his eyes on the incomplete drawing in front of him.

"Remember that tiny skirt you wore the other day?" The other girl nodded in confirmation of May's question. "You bent over in front of him and flashed him when you dropped your eyeliner. He had _no_ reaction – you would _think_ a teenage boy would get an erection or _something_ but… Nothing. He didn't even look up and I know that book he was reading wasn't _that _interesting."

"You're that observant?" Tracey asked, slapping a hand over his mouth when he realized what he had just asked. He liked May, the last thing he wanted to do was insult her intelligence by insinuating that she couldn't observe her brother's actions. Still, it was interesting for her to make _that_ particular observation about her brother.

To his surprise, May laughed. "Trust me, Trace," she began, flashing him a grin. "When it comes to my baby brother, there's nothing I don't notice."

Meeting her dark brown eyes that were so much like Gary's, Tracey wondered if she was warning him of something. Perhaps she had noticed that he was starting to take an interest in her brother; after all, she knew that he was gay and now here she was, raising questions about the other boy's sexuality. Not entirely sure what to say, Tracey forced a smile.

"I guess it's a good thing that someone's so observant, because there are times when Professor Oak is just way too oblivious to what's going on around him."

May simply laughed again, leaving Tracey under the distinct impression that anything he noticed about Gary was likely to be picked up by the girl. If Gary was as secretive as Tracey suspected him to be, May's perceptive observations could cause trouble between the two siblings and, with the way they bickered, that was the last thing they needed.

--- --- ---

Despite being surrounded by friends, laughing, joking, and seemingly having a great time, Gary was starting to feel miserable. There was no other way to describe it. It had started as fun but everything had grown tiresome during the past few hours. He was quick to realize that things had changed drastically since the last time he had been home; his friends were now obsessed with girls and sex – it seemed like that was the only thing they had talked about all night when they weren't cracking jokes about one of May's obviously gay friends.

For once, Gary was rendered into near silence while everyone else spoke; he simply had nothing to say. He had never been interested in girls, he supposed he could _try_ to feel something for his sister's friends but he doubted that would help matters. There had simply been too many confusing thoughts circulating his head since he had settled in at home. He constantly tried to push them to the back of his mind, to suppress the teenage fantasies that came up when he lie in bed at night but he always woke up the next morning feeling sick when it all came flooding back to him. In the back of his mind, Gary knew what the issue was, even if the conscious part of his brain refused to acknowledge it fully.

Glancing around the living room for a distraction from the conversation going on around him, Gary noticed Tracey emerge from the kitchen and their eyes met. Tracey smiled at him as he headed in the direction of the stairs; the eye contact broke and Gary hastily turned his attention back to the other boys in time for one of them to fix him with a mischievous grin.

"Gary, how were the girls at Sayda?"

It took a surprising amount of effort for Gary not to glare at the blonde boy, Wyatt, who had slyly asked the question. Instead, he managed to force a smile onto his face. "Because I had so much time to find out," he replied sarcastically. Some of the other boys laughed, others commented disbelievingly. Gary mentally sighed, he had only been fifteen when he started at the research center on Sayda Island – had they really expected him to hook up with peers that were _at least_ five years older than him? "It was all work, guys," he pointed out. "Non-stop for months straight. I didn't even have time to think about chicks."

"Pity," Wyatt sighed, taking a sip of a soda that Gary knew to have a large amount of alcohol in it. "'cause Professor Ivy's got some awesome -"

"I didn't even work with her there!" Gary cut him exasperatedly off before he could continue, not particularly wanting to hear his idiotic friends gushing over a professor's cleavage. Especially not when it was a professor he held much respect for.

Gary found himself wishing to be somewhere else as the others were sidetracked by the mention of the female scientist. Why were they so damn obsessed with breasts? It was driving him crazy. He was saved from their incessant chatter when May and several of her friends entered the room, all talking loudly, particularly her flamboyant male friend whose name he couldn't remember. His friends stopped talking and exchanged amused glances and laughs while Gary could feel his heart sink slightly. _Here we go again…_

Couldn't they just let it go?

_Apparently not_, he thought bitterly as the jokes and comments began. Sighing irritably, Gary rested his chin in his hand, his normal, confident smile fading into an expression of bored indifference. Several minutes passed and the others showed no sign of letting up; he was about ready to leave the couch when he felt a sharp poke in his side. Next to him, Darren grinned and Gary retaliated by shoving his shoulder before returning to brooding.

Darren leaned forward, resting his forearms across his knees after lightly pushing Gary back. "You're quiet," he observed.

"And you're drunk," Gary replied flatly.

"Only a little." Gary shot him a glance that told the other boy that he wasn't particularly happy. Most people wouldn't catch the slight glimmer or annoyance in his eyes but he had grown up with the dark-haired boy and could easily consider him a brother. Darren would notice what most people didn't, having grown up with the other boy, and that annoyance in Gary's gaze didn't escape his notice. "We're just having fun," he defended.

"I'm not," Gary muttered under his breath, quiet enough that only Darren would hear.

"Drink this; you'll be having fun in no time," a feminine voice said suddenly and a small glass of clear liquid was held in front of his face. Gary looked up to see May leaning on the back of the couch, smiling at him and obviously listening in on the conversation. A soft sigh escaped Gary has he warily took the drink. "You know you want to," May teased.

Without hesitating any more, Gary raised the glass to his lips and swallowed the shot quickly, forcing himself not to pull too much of a face at the taste of the strong drink.

"Not so innocent, are we?" May asked, leaning over to press a quick kiss against Gary's cheek as she took the glass back.

With a small amount of alcohol, he probably could have sat there awhile longer, forcing himself to listen to the mindless chatter, if someone hadn't chosen to utter a rude comment about May's friend when the girl sauntered off. _Screw it_. Gary stood and left the corner of the room that he and his friends had taken over, ignoring inquiries of where he was going. He wasn't sure where he was going, he just knew that it was away from them.

Gary found himself in the lab, brushing his Arcanine's fur with scowl on his face a few moments later. He wasn't quite sure why he was so annoyed – his friends had always managed to be idiots, they had always brought up girls; so why did it bother him so much this time?

_You know exactly why_… The quiet voice in the back of his head murmured, causing Gary to shake his head almost violently.

"Shut the hell up," he hissed, pressing his palms against his eyes and willing the thought away. Arcanine peered up at him curiously and Gary crack a small, guilty smile at the pokemon as he picked up the brush that he had tossed away from him a moment earlier and began to brush the large dog once more. "I've only been here a month and I'm already losing my mind, Arcanine," he said with an ironic grin, shaking his head once more.

No matter how much he focused on running the brush over his pokemon's striped fur, he couldn't shake the inexplicable irritation towards his friends from his head. He was different from his friends – that was a particular feeling he couldn't escape. Granted, they all were different, in a core group of seven close friends, it was impossible for there not to be differences amongst their similarities. Hell, their personalities were all vastly different; from Wyatt, who was so spontaneous that Gary sometimes wondered if he should be institutionalized, to Chase, who was so calm that his hair could be on fire and he wouldn't raise his voice. Their interests were incredibly varied; Darren cared little for anything other than music, Adrian always had a book in hand or nearby, while Gary was adventurous and loved being outside handling pokemon in some way. Even their thoughts regarding sex were different; Chase, Mike, and Wyatt were utterly sex-crazed but too awkward to succeed in more than masturbation, Brandon was almost comical with startling innocence for a sixteen-year-old boy, and then there was Gary. He'd had several crushes throughout his life, though he only remembered one in particular; he hardly gave girls a second thought – he couldn't even recall ever liking a girl!

Perhaps he simply hadn't tried hard enough; after all, he had never really had the spare time to focus on that like the other boys did. They had stayed home and gone to school like normal kids, even though Darren and Mike had both been trainers at some point, while Gary had been busy with training and then researching ever since he was ten. Still, he supposed he could like girls if he just got used to not having a constant distraction from them.

Arcanine gave a sudden bark, effectively startling Gary out of his thoughts and forcing him to notice that he had been brushing the same spot on the canine's back for the past five minutes. He gave the animal an apologetic smile and set down the brush with a small sigh before sitting in front of his pokemon and began to scratch the dog behind the ears.

"Who would have imagined that adjusting to life here would be so _easy_?" he asked Arcanine with sarcasm dripping from his voice.

The dog gave him a reproachful look that Gary would have responded to if he hadn't been distracted by squeaking followed by footsteps and Tracey's soft but firm voice.

"No, Marril, you _know _you can't play in the lab; that's what the pool is for," the boy was insisting tiredly when he paused at the sight of Gary in the lab with Arcanine. Marril had disappeared around a corner, still squeaking happily, and Tracey rolled his eyes and hurried around the corner. He emerged a moment later with the blue mouse squirming in his arms as he made his way over to where Gary and Arcanine were sitting. "Get bored at the party?" Tracey inquired.

Gary shrugged, reaching out to pet Marril as it sniffed him cautiously. The little pokemon had yet to warm up to him, despite the treats and pats that Gary often gave him. "Something like that," he replied indifferently. "You?"

"I was actually going to get something to eat, but _somebody_ had other plans," Tracey looked down at his pokemon with a significant look. Marril hastily turned his attention back to his trainer and gave an indignant squeak that made both boys laugh.

"Stubborn little thing, isn't he?"

Tracey laughed again and nodded; he had to force himself not too be too distracted by the amused grin on Gary's face. "You have no idea."

They shared a smile and Gary suddenly felt the thoughts from moments before come flooding back to him. Something must have shown on his face because Tracey's smile faded slightly and he opened his mouth to say something, only to be cut off by the lab door opening again. Gary looked up as someone called his name and scowled slightly when his friend Mike rounded the corner and announced that May was looking for him. He hesitated for a moment, torn between following his friend out of the lab to find his sister or staying in the large room with Tracey. He felt oddly drawn to the pokemon watcher and a large part of him would have preferred to stay in the quiet lab with him and his pokemon, talking about something – anything – other than what the others were talking about. Closed off as he naturally was, he had the inexplicable urge to vocalize his thoughts to Tracey. Something told him that the boy would understand.

Finally, Gary stood and Tracey followed suit, his smile seeming a bit sad. "I guess I should go up to bed," Tracey announced, starting towards the door.

"Guess so," Gary muttered, his eyes following the other boy out of the room. Once Tracey was gone, he heaved a sigh and ran a hand through his hair before forcing his face into his normal smirk as he too headed for the door.

In that moment, he made up his mind. He was most definitely going to _have_ to start trying to like girls – his eyes seemed to linger on Tracey far too much for his liking.

--- --- ---


	5. Chapter 4

**Secrets Kept**

Thanks to Defiant Vixen for reviewing, as always! I totally agree with you with the partying – I hate it when people write Gary as a party animal, it doesn't fit someone serious about researching, much less someone raised by a professor.

Gary and Tracey's conversation in the lab was _so_ inspired by a conversation with one of my friends in our college speech class… Ah, memories.

Chapter Four

Liking girls shouldn't be that hard, Gary had decided after May's party. It should come easily enough to a sixteen-year-old boy; all he really had to do was flirt with them and be interested when his friends talked about them nonstop. Being naturally perceptive, it didn't take Gary very long to figure out that he had always been flirting with his sister's friends – in a playful way, but it was flirting nonetheless – and that there was no way he could even pretend to be so interested when the conversations turned crude. Fortunately for him, he quickly noticed that not all of his friends were interested in the conversations and he was able to tune them out while doing something else entirely. Doing that didn't raise any suspicions that he didn't feel the same way as the other boys since they tended to be doing their own thing, even when hanging out in a group. The distractions provided a sort of comfort, even if it was just taking over whatever video game Mike was playing, watching Darren play an instrument, or annoying Adrian by reading over his shoulder.

Of course, distractions couldn't last forever. He wasn't always in a group of four to seven people, more often, he was with only one or two friends and couldn't just do something else. Those situations in particular bothered Gary as he invariably ended up lying to his friends when he normally prided himself on his honesty. The lies were small and harmless, this was true, but that didn't exactly help matters.

There were times when he almost felt as though he were going insane and those moments of sanity that he did experience seemed to be cut short by the confusing thoughts that would constantly circulate his head. Helping in the lab helped a bit but Gary often found himself distracted by Tracey. It wasn't that the older boy intentionally distracted him from whatever he was doing; it was more that the little, insignificant interactions between them that would distract him – the shared smiles, the occasional accidental brushes of bare skin… I didn't help that Gary constantly found his gaze following the watcher as he went about his usual work in the lab. Gary was certain that Tracey knew about him constantly watching him, whether or not he knew _why_ was beyond Gary – as was the reason he was watching the other boy in the first place. He doubted Tracey knew how much their interactions were distracting him and he knew for a fact that his grandfather hadn't noticed. The older man was simply too wrapped up in some project involving Goldeen feeding behavior; the newest project he had picked up to keep himself amused.

Fortunately, there was one major distraction looming in the near future that offered some relief from the inner turmoil that Gary was forever trying – and failing miserably – to block out. School was set to start in just over a week and, though he was not looking forward to being stuck in a classroom all day, Gary was grateful for the extra workload that was about to be thrown his way. He was far too bored with little to do, even if he did work in the lab and hang out with friends most of the time.

"What classes are you signing up for?" Tracey's soft voice suddenly cut through the near-silence of the lab, effectively slicing through Gary's thoughts.

He glanced up from the counter where he was measuring out amounts of pokemon food for the next morning. "Classes?" he echoed, thrown off by the random question that Tracey had just asked him.

Tracey laughed softly, easily noticing that he had managed to slightly confuse the other boy. He gave a small smile before speaking again and Gary felt his stomach churn – there was that smile again… What had they just been talking about?

"School starts soon, right? Don't you have to register for your classes in a few days?"

Gary sighed and abandoned his task of preparing the food. "Yeah," he confirmed wearily.

"You don't sound so thrilled," Tracey replied mildly, picking up some of the food on the counter and resuming the job Gary had just abandoned.

Gary simply shrugged and returned his attention to preparing the food. "I just don't like being stuck inside all day."

Another small smile crossed Tracey's features as he glanced over at the younger boy. "I noticed," he said easily. "You tend to fidget a lot whenever you're inside for a long time," he explained at Gary's confused expression. "You'll be so busy it won't even bother you once things get started."

"That's not entirely reassuring, Trace." Tracey unexpectedly reached over the counter in front of him to grab an empty food bowl, his hand accidentally brushing against Gary's wrist, causing Gary to jerk back suddenly.

Tracey hesitated slightly, pulling away from the other boy a bit. "Sorry," he apologized. "I didn't hit your stitches did I?" he asked, now remembering the rather large wound Gary had gotten on his arm from… Well, he had gotten injured so many times in the two months he had been home that they were all starting to run together and Tracey couldn't even recall what it was that had caused Gary to require several stitches in his forearm.

"No," Gary said quietly, squirming as Tracey gently took his arm and looked over the injury. "I just bumped it… on the, um…"

"Counter?" Tracey supplied, glancing up with a slight smile.

"Sure," Gary lied. The last thing he wanted to do was admit that Tracey's touch could nearly make his head spin, all thoughts taking on a perverse edge that Gary found to be mildly alarming. Tracey seemed to notice his discomfort and released Gary's arm, blushing slightly.

"I should probably go… I need to check on that Nidorina with the broken leg," he muttered as he stepped away from the counter and began to head towards the door of the lab.

Gary watched him go for a moment before calling his name, causing Tracey to pause at the door, his hand already resting on the handle. "Um…" he shifted his weight uncomfortably as Tracey looked at him inquiringly. He wasn't quite sure why he had done that or what he intended to say. _Idiot. _"Well, you went to the high school here, right?" Tracey nodded, curious by the uncharacteristic behavior. "What classes did you take? I don't really know…" Gary let his voice trail off as Tracey came back over to the counter he was leaning against. The last thing he felt like doing was telling another lie and saying that he didn't know what he was doing was a definite lie.

Tracey smiled again, this time obviously amused. "If you're taking the fast track to finish in two years, you won't have much choice in the classes you'll be taking," he pointed out. He had seen straight through the lie and his curiosity had been triggered. Ever the watcher, Tracey had noticed the discomfort that Gary seemed to experience when they were around each other; he had even noticed the faint blush that occasionally darkened the boy's cheeks around him. Any suspicions Tracey had when Gary moved home had been heightened to the point where Tracey was more than certain… It didn't matter; even if that _was_ the case, he could never date the grandson of his boss – even if he found Gary to be good-looking, intelligent, and fun to be around. It just couldn't happen.

"I guess…" Gary wasn't quite sure what to say. Part of him simply wanted casual conversation about whatever trivial topic came up between them, another part of him had perhaps a hundred personal questions for Tracey, all dealing with the same topic – the thoughts that he had been forcing back, the reason his friendship with Ash had been pushed aside, the subconscious knowledge that, no matter how hard he tried, he simply couldn't see girls in the same light as his friends. Tracey seemed to pick up on the desire for conversation.

"I just took the classes that were there," he said with a small shrug. "Pallet's too small to really offer many electives so you end up pretty much taking everything that's offered. I ended up taking art classes every year and playing on the soccer team, it counts as an elective credit. Kind of surprising that the school even has a sports team of any sort," he added as an afterthought.

Gary raised an eyebrow slightly, having not expected that revelation. He knew that half of his friends played as well; hell, he often played with them and enjoyed it thoroughly. Playing it on a team at school though… With how much his eyes had been lingering on Tracey – even Darren and Adrian on occasion, both were good-looking – he wasn't entirely sure he trusted his eyes not to wander in a locker room. "But you're gay."

Tracey laughed and shook his head. "I know," he replied easily.

"Well, didn't that cause any issues?"

"Not really; I mean, if any one knew about me, they didn't say anything. I didn't really advertise it." At Gary's curious expression, he pressed on. "I didn't hide it. If anyone asked, I would've answered honestly. I guess I'm just not feminine enough to raise any eyebrows." Gary laughed softly at the joke. "You meant in the locker rooms, didn't you?" Tracey asked. He had been able to see some interest in Gary's eyes when he mentioned playing on the team, along with a touch of worry that he wasn't quite sure what to make of.

"Yeah." Tracey gave him a knowing smile and Gary wondered briefly if Tracey had any idea why that question had come up in the first place. He himself knew why he had asked it, even if it was something that his mind hadn't put into discernable thoughts just yet. Somehow, he had the idea that this conversation would be relevant to him at some point in the future.

"I had one of the corner lockers, so I just faced them when everyone was getting dressed –"

"Didn't sneak any peeks at the other guys?" Gary teased. He laughed when Tracey blushed furiously and gave a shaky laugh of his own.

"Once or twice," Tracey admitted after playfully punching Gary's shoulder.

Gary hesitated for a brief moment, wondering whether or not to press on. He gave in; after all, he had taken a liking to picking on his friend. "See anything you like?"

Tracey turned, if possible, even more red as he laughed again. "In all honesty, I would probably see better if I walked in on you in the shower."

"I think you would find it a bit unimpressive," Gary replied, causing Tracey to nearly dissolve in laughter.

"You're only sixteen," Tracey pointed out when he sobered.

It was Gary's turn to laugh. "Are we seriously having this conversation?"

"What's the matter, too gay for you?" Tracey teased lightly, rather enjoying the way they easily joked with each other, despite the short length of their friendship thus far. "You're not a closet homophobe are you, Gary?"

Gary laughed again and it faded a bit suddenly before he replied. "I could never be homophobic," he admitted.

Silence fell between the two boys for a few seconds and Gary suddenly realized what he had just said and felt a surge of emotions – confusion, worry, and a small amount of fear; all combined with the slight and inexplicable hope that Tracey was catching on to what was going on. Tracey easily noticed when Gary realized his words; the tension that appeared in his shoulders and the slight widening of his eyes were had for someone like Tracey to miss, experienced watcher that he was. In that moment, any and all suspicions Tracey had were confirmed and he gave Gary a small, understanding smile.

Choosing not to say anything in response, Tracey glanced towards the door and then back at Gary with a small frown. "I really need to go check on that Nidorina," was all he said. Gary nodded and Tracey left him to finish setting up the bowls of pokemon food.

As he turned back to the counter and continued working, his mind was whirling with thoughts that suddenly became much more clear. Setting down a bag of dry food, Gary felt a sense of realization dawning on him and sighed softly. "Shit," he muttered softly as everything that had been lurking in his subconscious mind came to the surface.

Behind him, the lab door opened loudly and he could hear a few of his friends enter the room. He closed his eyes for a moment, wishing they could have waited perhaps a few more hours before finding him.

"Not helping Tracey today?" a quiet and curious voice asked. Gary turned to reply to the question asked by the smallest and youngest member of their group, Adrian, who had hair as dark as Tracey's, if a bit longer and shaggier. His features were fair and his eyes were forever bright and cheerful – he had a charming, child-like quality to him that several girls in town found attractive. Gary couldn't quite deny that he found it cute as well.

Before Gary could answer, another voice spoke up. "I swear, he is so in the closet," Wyatt said, ever rash and annoying. Next to him, lanky, brunette Chase rolled his eyes and elbowed him in the ribs.

Remembering a line from the conversation only a few moments earlier, Gary replied. "He's not in the closet, you moron." Wyatt shrugged off the insult, used to the names by now.

"I swear you have a built in gay-dar," Chase said with a grin, glancing at Gary for help picking on Wyatt. "Sure that _you're_ not gay?"

"Fuck you!"

Gary shook his head, turning back to the counter to begin putting everything away while his heart sank slightly at Wyatt's irritable response to Chase's playful words. _You're not going to be able to tell them_, that annoying voice in the back of his head hissed.

"We have to go get Mike and Brandon – are you going to meet us over at the beach?" Chase asked Gary after shooting some humored response at Wyatt.

Gary nodded without turning around, explaining that he had to clean up. He hoped that his voice didn't actually sound as hollow as it did to him. Adrian offered to stay and help him but Gary brushed off the offer, claiming it would only take a few moments. He could have used the help, the food materials were a pain to put away, but the last thing he wanted right now was a cute boy – who happened to be a friend – stay and help him. The boys left and Gary sighed once they were gone, sinking wearily against the counter for several moments. The door opened after awhile and Tracey came in, followed closely by Gary's Umbreon and Houndoom, both of whom headed straight over to their trainer as Gary forced a smile.

Tracey saw through the smile and tilted his head to the side, considering the closed-off boy across the room from him. The young researcher hadn't been quite so detached when they had been speaking earlier. He wondered briefly if his down mood had anything to do with his three friends leaving so soon. "Are you alright?" he asked. Gary shrugged and gave a slight roll of his eyes, saying something about being tired as he kneeled down to pet the two canines that happily greeted him. Tracey accepted the answer, even though he didn't quite believe it, and left the lab for the house.

After several long moments, the door opened again and Gary groaned. Couldn't anyone just leave him alone so he could finish what he was doing? The task should have taken an hour and it had been far longer by now and he still wasn't done. Darren's cheerful greeting did little to lighten his mood, even as the teen automatically came over to begin helping without being asked. Gary avoided looking at him, though he took some bit of comfort in the way the other boy babbled on about something dealing with music.

"What's with you?" Darren asked after awhile, confused by the way Gary was being so quiet. It wasn't particularly often that Gary was quiet and it usually wasn't for a good reason that he was _this_ quiet.

Gary finally faced his friend, warily taking in the boy's sharp, attractive features; the long dark hair that was currently tumbling over his shoulders did little to alleviate the good looks. "I don't feel well," Gary replied. It wasn't quite a lie – lying to Darren would be useless considering the way he could see through his lies, much like his grandfather and May were able to.

Darren seemed a bit doubtful. "What did you get stung by this time?"

"Nothing, I just –"

"Got bit by something poisonous?"

"Venomous," Gary corrected automatically. "No, I'm just tired. I don't think I'm going to go with you guys," he said, referring to the plans the group had to meet up at the beach for a couple of hours of surfing and hanging out before going out for pizza. It was a common thing for them to do and Gary normally enjoyed it; he just wasn't entirely sure he would be able to maintain a cool façade. His thoughts were still going haywire and he worried that, with enough prodding, he might spill his guts to the other boys. If that didn't happen, it was likely that he would end up snapping at them for talking about _girls_ so damn much – which he was sure they would do.

"Liar," Darren pouted. "Come on, at least for a little bit?"

Gary sighed and, not feeling like arguing, gave in. He was abandoning his normal stubbornness, but maybe going along would give him some sort of distraction from his troubled thoughts and his recent realization, even if he was going to be around six shirtless teens, two of which he found attractive. It wasn't as if he was going to automatically become sex-crazed just because he had realized that he was like Tracey.

Either way, Gary realized that things were going to be different and he doubted he was going to like the change.

--- --- ---


	6. Chapter 5

**Secrets Kept**

I finally updated!!

Sorry for the delay, school is chaotic so I've barely been able to keep my sanity, let alone write. I've been busy working on _Friends, Rivals, and Lovers_ the past week or so. I'm rewriting the first few chapters a bit and then I'll have the next couple of chapters up with the re-worked beginning chapters soon.

Thanks to Defiant Vixen and Jsi-Spitz for their reviews!

Chapter Five

A sigh escaped Gary as he leaned back against the wooden wall behind him and tossed aside the textbook he had been working with. The last thing he felt like doing was homework; not when the weather was this nice. Granted, it was a bit too chilly to go to the beach like he and his friends usually did, but it was still a nice, crisp late-September afternoon. He felt like running around, playing with Umbreon or Arcanine or meeting his friends down at the school to play soccer in the field there; anything to keep him outside and active. Of course, he technically was currently outside, albeit eight feet of the ground in an old tree house that he and his friends had built as children. When he had first settled down with his book bag that afternoon, he hadn't been able to keep from wondering just how a group of seven-year-olds had managed to build such a large and sturdy fort so high above the ground. He remembered vaguely that they'd had help from older siblings, parents, and even his grandfather, but he was still a bit surprised that it was still in such good condition.

Being in a place with so many fond memories seemed to make the dull task of completing several hours' worth of homework far more bearable. Everything was finally done and Gary had to suppress a groan at the thought of being cooped up inside the town's school even more during the week, being bored to the point that he would spend half of the time either sleeping or absently doodling on spare sheets of paper. He missed the days of summer that were spent outside. He missed working with the Aerodactyl back at Sayda Island. He even missed his days as a trainer. It seemed as though those times belonged to a different dimension now that he was busy with school – the repetitive and mind-numbing work expected of him simply seemed to drain him of life. Gary was definitely not the type of person to do the same thing every day for long periods of time.

As he began to shove the textbooks and notebooks back into his bag, he heard footsteps crunching over the fallen leaves on the ground below. Wondering if it was one of his friends hoping to copy his homework, he paused and carefully leaned forward to see out the door without the person below seeing him.

"Hey, are you up there?"

He smiled slightly, a bit relieved that it was just his grandfather. "No, I ran away and disappeared off the face of the planet," he replied dryly.

"Ah. One less mouth to feed." Gary laughed softly and moved so that he was sitting in the doorway of the tree house. "Can we talk?"

"What about?" Gary asked warily, wracking his brains for what he could have possibly done to get in trouble.

"School. You're not in trouble," the professor added hastily, as though he had read his thoughts.

Gary rolled his eyes. "There's a first," he muttered as he pulled his bag to him, zipped it up, and dropped it to the ground before jumping down.

The professor closed his eyes and shook his head, resisting the urge to smack his grandson in the back of the head. "Do you not remember breaking your ankle doing that when you were younger?"

"I do now," Gary replied, smirking at his grandfather as he hoisted the book bag onto one of his shoulders. "What about school?"

"I talked to your teachers," Professor Oak began and Gary wondered once more what he had done. He may have been bored in his classes, but he was well-behaved and had the highest grades in his classes. The professor gave him an almost sly smile before continuing. "You could have told me that you were bored out of your mind, you know; it's amazing that you can draw so much in class and still score so high on your exams –"

"I'm assuming there's a point to this."

Professor Oak shook his head, muttering something about impatience. No one could say that Gary had ever been a particularly patient person. "Fine, I'll get right to it; you can either stay in your science classes and be bored, or you can do an independent study in the lab."

"In other words, I can do whatever I want in the lab and skip class?" Gary asked suspiciously. There had to be a catch to this – getting out of the classes at school was far too simple.

"Actually, you would be working with Tracey." A particularly annoyed groan escaped Gary before he could suppress it at that. Of course, the catch would be spending more time with the boy that he had by now admitted that _maybe_ he had a _slight_, very small crush on. _Maybe_. "I thought you and Tracey were good friends," the professor added, appearing to be a bit confused by the unexpected reaction.

"Yeah…"

The professor shook his head again with a small smile. "We both know what happens whenever you're alone the lab. Blood ends up all over, you get hurt – or poisoned somehow – and I end up short medical supplies. Hence, you are working with Tracey on this. Nonnegotiable."

Gary frowned; he didn't get injured _that_ often in the lab. Either way, this was an interesting opportunity – even if he would have to work with Tracey, something he wasn't quite sure he wanted to do. The older boy was easy to get along with and they had developed a comfortable friendship between them, this was true. The issue, however, was that, quite simply, Tracey was attractive in several ways; physical being only one of them. Being around him for too long seemed to leave Gary feeling confused and frustrated; the feelings were only intensified by the fact that he couldn't freely speak to anyone about them.

Seeming to notice the amount of inner turmoil going through Gary's head, the professor spoke up once more. "You don't have to choose today. Think about it over the next few days, maybe talk to Tracey and your other friends –"

"I'll do it," Gary cut him off rather firmly, surprising himself with the sudden response. It was the mention of his friends that had done it. Seeing them chase after the girls at school had been driving him to the brink of insanity and seeing Mike with his new girlfriend everyday was not helping matters much. He only had two science classes but if he was able to escape seeing the other boys for even those two classes, maybe it would help a bit.

_There's still Tracey though,_ he had to remind himself.

... ... ...

Tracey gazed at the half-open bedroom door next to his own room and shifted his weight uncomfortably. He wasn't sure why he was so nervous about working with Gary, but he was. It was a strange feeling – being such good friends with someone and, yet, wanting more. It was a simple crush, that was what Tracey had told himself but this felt stronger than any other crush. Perhaps he had just forgotten what it felt like to like someone, or maybe he just wished that he could find something that he liked enough to date. In the end, he had to admit that he wanted a boyfriend.

Over the past few weeks, he had noticed a shift in Gary's mood and suspected that it stemmed from the conversation they'd had in the lab before school had started for the younger teen. Gary seemed to be a bit withdrawn and quiet compared to his normal sarcastic and, on occasion, outspoken self. Tracey had seen him snap at friends more often than usual and had noticed an increase in the bickering that occurred between the two Oak siblings whenever May was around. What Tracey noticed even more than that, though, was a certain air between himself and Gary. Tracey was certain that there was a mutual attraction between him and Gary, and there were times when they were alone when Gary seemed as though he were simply dying to say something but always held back. He hoped that working with the younger researcher would cheer up a bit with being able to skip classes to work in the lab.

Finally, Tracey knocked on the door and pushed it open, expecting Gary to still be asleep; after all, it was still fairly early in the morning. He was surprised to find the other boy already awake and sitting on the floor in front of the television in his room, playing a video game. Gary barely glanced up from the game, even when Tracey entered the room and perched on the edge of the bed, noticing how eerily clean the room was for a teenager. Was it just him, or had the room been messier a mere month earlier? It seemed as if the room had become cleaner as Gary's mood had declined.

"Ready to start working in the lab?"

"Is it time to head down there already?" Gary replied, still wholly focused on the television.

Tracey blinked and resisted the urge to shake his head; there were times when he was forced to remember that Gary was related to the professor. "Yeah… How long have you been up?"

"Awhile."

"You're as bad as your grandfather," Tracey muttered, sighing softly. Gary cursed loudly as the character in the video game died and Tracey couldn't help but laugh when Gary tossed the controller aside and irritably turned off the television.

"Let's go downstairs," Gary suggested, heading out of the room with Tracey still laughing softly as he followed him.

"Do you have any idea what you want to work on?" Tracey asked when he had finally sobered.

"Not a clue."

Sometime later found the two teens in the lab, sitting across from each other at a table and trying to come up with any sort of research ideas. So far, they'd had little luck – Gary's mind seemed to be elsewhere and Tracey was finding it rather hard to keep the other boy from drifting off into his own thoughts. Finally, he opted for an approach other than silently brainstorming with the occasional spoken thoughts.

"You're always reading – what's your favorite book?" Tracey asked, thinking of how often he had stumbled across the teen sprawled out on the couch in the living room with a book in hand.

"_Frankenstein_," Gary replied flatly, barely glancing at Tracey.

Tracey sighed and idly twirled his pen between his fingers. "Hmm," he began thoughtfully, hoping to pull Gary's attention away from the windows that he was currently gazing out of. "The ethics could be a bit of an issue… Not to mention the possible God-complex that you could develop from that."

A small smile curved Gary's lips as he finally glanced over at him. "Not to mention trying to find body parts to use. Darren and Adrian are only so willing to help out around here."

Tracey laughed at that and shook his head in amusement. This was the reason he liked Gary so much – that dry sense of humor that allowed them to easily bounce retorts off of each other. Despite his amusement, his laugh faded quickly. They still needed to find a project for Gary to work on. "Ok, how about your favorite movie? And,_ please_, don't say Jurassic Park; we don't have that type of equipment."

"Dawn of the Dead."

"Hate to break it to you, Gary, but we're fresh out of zombies around here."

"And I take it we're all out of the T-virus as well?" Gary asked amusedly. "Resident Evil," he explained at Tracey's confused expression.

Tracey laughed again, resisting the urge to groan in frustration – this was going nowhere. "I worry about you."

"Nice to know someone does," Gary sighed, all amusement suddenly fading as he turned somber.

Tracey's gaze turned critical while he glanced Gary over. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Gary simply shook his head. "Nothing."

Of course, Tracey doubted this but let it go anyway. Who was he to press the boy about something Gary obviously didn't want to talk about? Instead of questioning him further, something he felt compelled to do, Tracey pulled a scrap of paper to him and began doodling absently. Several moments passed in near-silence, the only sound being that of Tracey's pen scratching against the surface of the paper.

Though he was sitting silently, gazing out the lab window while appearing to be carefree, Gary was preoccupied. His confusing thoughts had become more and more frequent since school had started; the constant work did little to distract him and he was failing miserably at forcing himself to like girls. In the back of his mind, he knew that there was no way he could ever distract himself from his questionable sexuality, but he couldn't help but try and then try even harder when he caught his eyes lingering on Tracey or – even more embarrassing – Adrian or Darren. Or that last time they had played soccer together and Brandon had taken off his shirt… Or the time Wyatt wore his girlfriend's tight jeans to school…

Another sigh escaped Gary and he tiredly dropped his head on his arms that were folded on the table. He needed to get past this somehow before it became a bigger issue than it already was. Reason told him that talking to someone would help but pride held him back from letting his guard down and paranoia told him that no one would understand or accept it. He had considered casually bringing it up around Darren – after all, the boy was his best friend in the world; they had grown up together and Darren was likely to be the most open-minded in their group. But their close friendship was the exact thing that prevented him from mentioning it. The last thing he wanted was to harm the relationship on the off-chance that Darren would have an issue with it.

There was always Tracey, Gary supposed. They had become quite close since he had moved back in May, now nearly six months earlier, and he could almost consider Tracey to be as close to him as Wyatt or Adrian – which was startlingly close considering that those two were second only to Darren. It almost scared Gary when he thought about how quickly he had become close to the pokemon watcher, especially when one factored in the attraction he felt towards the older boy. Gary was certain he could trust Tracey, at the very least, he wouldn't tell anyone and he was more likely to understand than any of his other friends were.

"You alright?" Tracey asked, glancing up from his drawing.

Gary hesitated slightly, wondering whether or not to answer perfectly honestly. "Just tired," he lied.

"You were fine a few minutes ago," Tracey pointed out. Gary said nothing so Tracey returned to his doodling without another word.

Another few minutes passed in silence before it was broken by Gary. "When did you realize you were gay?" _Why the __fuck__ did you just do that?_ his brain screamed at him.

Tracey paused in the middle of his sketch and slowly laid down his pencil. This was unexpected – he had almost hoped that Gary would eventually talk to him about this but never expected it to be this soon or sudden. "I guess I always knew," he replied after a short moment of thought. He couldn't help noticing how uncomfortable Gary appeared after the question had slipped out of his mouth.

"Really?"

Gary sounded doubtful so Tracey elaborated. "I have a younger brother who's your age and I noticed pretty early on that he was interested in girls more than boys but I was the opposite. I realized that I was different from him and the other kids." He shrugged and glanced back down at his drawing, realizing that this was really the first time anyone had ever asked him that particular question. Now that he thought about it, Tracey realized that he had never actually had a friend that was gay, like himself.

"That's it?"

"That's when I noticed I was different… I didn't really hone in on what it was until I was around twelve. My brother was absolutely in love with this one girl in school so he started asking me for advice and it kind of hit me." Tracey shrugged again, not entirely knowing what to say. He had never struggled with it so he was unsure about what to say to someone that he suspected _was_ struggling with the same thing that he had dealt with so easily. Gary gave him an inquiring look that Tracey took as a prompt to continue, which he did with a small, nervous laugh. "I was confused about it for awhile and I ended up talking to my father about it. I told him that I didn't really like girls and, when he asked if I was gay, I told him I didn't know… I'd never thought of it before. So he told me not to worry about it and that it would come to me with time and then, a few months later, I was out of the closet entirely."

While Tracey spoke, Gary felt an inexplicable mix of emotions – jealousy, helplessness, even a touch of anger. It wasn't fair: Tracey was the only one around that was like him, but they couldn't relate – the situation was obviously far easier for Tracey than it was for Gary. There was no way he could talk to anyone in his family, May was far too talkative and would quickly blurt it out to her friends and the entirety of Pallet would know by the next day. The professor was always busy and, with how absent-minded and forgetful he could be, Gary felt certain that any conversation with the man would leave him feeling even worse. And this was all _if _they were supportive of him. For that, he was jealous of Tracey – obviously his family had been supportive and understanding. That train of thought left him feeling helpless and thoroughly depressed.

"Your family didn't have any issues?" Gary asked. It took effort to keep his voice free of any annoyance that he felt.

Tracey shook his head. "My mother apparently suspected it for awhile, but, yeah, they were fine with it." He gave Gary a small smile, sensing that the younger boy wasn't particularly happy with his revelations. "Families are usually very supportive, and a lot of times, someone either suspects it or knows it," he pointed out, thinking about the conversation May had with one of her close friends while Tracey was in the kitchen over summer.

May suspected that her brother was gay and, given the fact that the young woman had a few very obviously gay friends, Tracey was sure she would be supportive. As for the professor, he adored his assistant even when he knew about Tracey; in Tracey's mind, there was no way they wouldn't be supportive if Gary chose to talk to them. While Tracey was thinking this, Gary sighed loudly and crossed his arms, appearing rather cross.

"What's wrong?" Tracey asked, feeling fairly certain that he already knew the answer. Gary simply shook his head in response and, just as Tracey was about to reply, the door opened and Professor Oak came into the lab from outside.

The professor mentioned something about Gary needing to get ready to head to school and Tracey watched the other boy roll his eyes and respond with an annoyed snap that was a bit uncharacteristic, even for someone so sarcastic and irritable. "I guess skipping calculus is out of the question," Gary muttered once the older man had left the room.

"He's still annoyed at you for skipping English last week. I wouldn't push your luck," Tracey suggested. The argument between the professor and Gary after that particular incident had been rather memorable and Tracey wasn't likely to forget about it too quickly. It was the first time he had seen Professor Oak truly angry and it was also the first time he had seen exactly how stubborn Gary could be, constantly insisting on getting in one final word to outdo whatever the professor had last said.

Gary groaned and rolled his eyes again. "Nothing pleases him," he muttered. Tracey knew that this was untrue but stayed quiet to humor Gary – he wasn't willing to start an argument, especially not when it was still technically morning.

Silence fell once more as Tracey returned to his sketch and Gary made no move to leave the lab, apparently intent on either pushing the limits of his grandfather's patience or miss his class – both if possible. The behavior confused Tracey as he had always seen Gary as a fiercely determined individual who was dead-set on being at the top of whatever field he ended up in, regardless of his young age. The boy had opted for a fast track out of school just to get back to research as quickly as possible and he had signed up for the hardest classes there were, though this didn't say much considering how small Pallet's high school was. School had started out fine, or so Tracey had thought, but the professor had caught onto problems swiftly, perhaps because of how close-knit the town was. The boredom hadn't seemed to surprise anyone and was passed off easily with harder work or, in the case of the science classes, the work in the lab. It was the skipping class that had surprised and annoyed the professor. What had surprised him even more was that it was just Gary doing it. It seemed as though the professor could better understand the situation if the other boys had been a bad influence in some way.

The lab door opened again and Professor Oak called for his grandson once again, being met with another irritated snap that caused Tracey to glance up from his drawing, wondering what was causing the small outbursts. _Maybe he's just sick of being stuck in Pallet_, he wondered. Suddenly, an idea for this elusive research project that Gary was supposed to be starting came to him.

"Did your grandfather tell you about the project that Professor Birch is starting on?" he asked as Gary stood up to leave.

"The Sharpedo one?" Tracey nodded. "He mentioned it."

"Why don't you help out with that for your work here? He'll need background research," Tracey suggested.

Gary paused before leaving the lab, glancing back at Tracey with a curious expression. "How did you know that was something I would want to do?"

Tracey shrugged and gave him a small smile. "I'm psychic," he joked. Gary shook his head with a roll of the eyes, a faint smile curving his lips as he turned to leave. "Hey," he called after the younger boy when he made it to the door on the opposite side of the room. "Have fun with Adrian after school. You two always hang out on Wednesdays," Tracey added as an explanation when Gary gave him another inquiring look.

Gary smiled again and left the room, wondering how exactly Tracey always seemed to pick up on those things. Even his friends that saw him everyday seemed to be unable to pick up on patterns, even his grandfather with his ways of observing him never seemed to hone in on what his interest was at a specific point in time, not even his sister seemed able to read his moods – at least, that was how it was in Gary's mind. Sometimes it felt as though he were invisible to everyone except Tracey, who had an uncanny ability to pick up on the smallest things about him.

Perhaps invisibility could be a good thing, at least until he was able to deal with the confusion over his sexuality and who he liked. On the other hand, not being noticed by those close to him was certain to sting harshly. Distancing himself, he figured, would help in the grand scheme of things – it would help when his family and friends inevitably figured out that he was gay and decided to abandon him, and it would help to alleviate the blooming feelings between him and Tracey.

It was a stupid idea, born purely out of paranoia, but it seemed to make sense at the time. Then again, nonsensical things often seemed to make sense in the mind of a teenager – especially in the mind of a stubborn sixteen-year-old.

... ... ...


	7. Chapter 6

**Secrets Kept**

Again, my apologies for the delay! I've had this chapter floating in my head for quite some time now, but never got the time to sit down and type it out because of all of the work required for my final semester of school. Since I just graduated and my job refuses to give me any more hours for work, I have some time to actually write.

Thanks to everyone who has reviewed this so far, and, if anyone who has read _Evolution_ is reading this, thank you to the many people who have reviewed and thank you to those who continue to review. I am hoping to write a story corresponding with that one but from Gary's point of view, since _Evolution_ was from Ash's point of view. There are actually several stories I want to write and I'm just hoping to get around to them _sometime_ soon.

Anyway, I hope this chapter is enjoyed. This is the longest and most angsty chapter so far, so I hope it makes up for my lack of updates this past semester. I had to use personal experiences with alcohol, as well as the stupidity of my own friends, as inspiration for parts of this chapter. Poor Gary. By the way, more Tracey to come in the next chapter!

... ... ...

Chapter Six

"We should go to the beach."

"Did the snow on the ground escape your notice? It's twenty fucking degrees outside and you want to go to the _beach_?"

"I never said I wanted to go surfing, I just said I wanted to go. You don't have to bite my head off, Gary."

"I'm not biting your head off, you're being an idiot."

"What the hell is your problem lately? You don't do anything other than work in the lab and act like an ass."

At his own desk in the lab, Tracey sighed softly; it was yet another argument between Gary and one of his friends, this time it was Adrian. Bickering wasn't at all uncommon between the boys of Pallet – Gary, Darren, and Wyatt were as bad as siblings – but lately, bickering had turned into arguing, which occasionally led to fighting. Gary and Wyatt were currently not speaking and Gary still bore a visible bruise on his cheek from the fight they had gotten in the week before, on top of that, things were tense between Gary and most of his friends and the professor was very obviously angry with his grandson for his behavior as of late.

It was December and school was out for winter break, yet Gary was constantly in the lab while his friends were forever goofing off around the town. The past two months had been a bit strange and uncomfortable as Gary's mood had plummeted while the boy seemed to withdraw from everyone around him, including Tracey – something that left the pokemon watcher confused. Tracey couldn't help but wonder if he had done something wrong, perhaps by being too forward with the whole "gay situation". Yet, that didn't seem to make sense as most conversations had been triggered by something Gary had said and Tracey had always backed off at any sign of discomfort. On top of that, the most in depth conversation they had gotten in had been when Gary had asked about when Tracey had realized his own preference.

Deep down, Tracey knew that this had nothing to do with him and that Gary was simply going through a rough time. Regardless, he felt somehow responsible, perhaps by not being there as much as he should have been. He constantly felt the urge to comfort the teen, it was just a matter of working up the courage to actually do it; Gary's mood had been less than hospitable lately, doing nothing to help Tracey and the anxiety that he felt over the situation.

One of the doors in the lab opened but, being used to people constantly being in and out of the lab, Tracey ignored it until someone pulled a chair over to his desk and sat down. Recognizing the voice that greeted him, Tracey smiled and returned the greeting to Darren. "You haven't been around much lately," Tracey observed, turning away from his computer.

Darren shrugged and crossed his arms over his chest. "I was letting things blow over with Gary after the Wyatt incident. Gary's really good at holding grudges," he explained. "I figure I'll judge his mood from a distance before going over there," he nodded at where Gary and Adrian were arguing still.

"Seems like a safe idea, all things considered."

Tracey's remark was met with an enthusiastic nod. "Do you know what's going on with him lately?"

Hesitating slightly, Tracey took an opportunity to observe the other boy's body language. Darren was utterly relaxed with only a slight touch of worry over his best friend reaching his eyes; oddly enough, he seemed rather confident that he knew something not everyone else was aware of. "I have an idea," Tracey admitted slowly, wondering what it was that Darren was thinking.

"Same here."

"So why don't you talk to him about it?"

"Because he's a stubborn pain in the ass," Darren replied as though it explained everything. With minimal prodding from Tracey, he continued. "I think this is something that Gary and I are on different wavelengths on. Besides, we fight too much for him to not get defensive if I were to bring it up. I have an idea of how to cheer him up though."

Tracey frowned at the grin that followed the last comment. "Professor Oak is already really annoyed with him lately, Darren," he warned, remembering rather suddenly that May had been talking all week about a party that Darren's older sister would be having that weekend. "I don't think getting him drunk is going to help matters. Not to mention the fact that May practically has to force alcohol down his throat to make him drink."

"He'll spend the night at my house, the professor'll never know."

Sensing a lost cause, Tracey didn't press his point. Maybe some fun with his friends was all Gary really needed, maybe a little alcohol combined with Darren and Wyatt's presence would make him loosen up a bit. Or maybe this was simply a disaster waiting to happen. Shaking his head, Tracey pushed the thoughts from his head – Gary would do what he wanted, whether it was good for him or not, whether it was what Tracey preferred him to do or not. He just hoped everything went alright.

... ... ...

Why, exactly, had he chosen to do this? Oh, of course, because Darren had some magical way of talking him into doing just about anything. Hell, he could probably figure out a way to talk Gary into making out with his own sister; that particular thought made Gary snort softly in amusement and it took a supreme amount of effort to not burst into laughter. His mood had improved a bit after being dragged over to Darren's house, though that could be attributed to the double shot of vodka that Darren had positively insisted on when they had been in the house for less than two minutes.

The alcohol had forced him to relax a bit and let down the guard that had been up for the past couple of months. It felt almost as though things were back to normal before he had realized that he was gay, Wyatt had seemed to forget about the fight they had gotten into the week before and Adrian didn't seem to care about the argument they'd had in the lab earlier that day. It was exactly like the summer, just colder – Darren spent most of the time playing instruments while Gary either annoyed him or tried to play along on Darren's drum set, Mike spent most of his time playing video games, Chase and Wyatt were talking about their experiences with their girlfriends while Brandon pointed out the places where their stories clashed with prior ones, and Adrian joined in whichever conversation appealed most to him at any given time.

Though the alcohol had helped him not to focus on it, random thoughts about the other boys would randomly pop into Gary's head. He couldn't help that Darren _always_ looked hot when he played his dark blue Ibanez guitar, it wasn't _his_ fault that Brandon had decided to wear such a tight pair of jeans, and it certainly wasn't his fault that Adrian had such an attractive laugh. After Wyatt and Darren had managed to get more alcohol into him, the thoughts stopped bothering him so much. They seemed natural and they weren't affecting the way he interacted with his friends – would telling them really result in some sort of Shakespearean tragedy? With some sense still lurking about in his brain, he had figured telling them when alcohol was involved was not a good idea. He would certainly regret it once he sobered; but if he had managed to pass it off as a joke, he could judge the reactions of the others and decide whether or not to tell them.

In the end, he chose to suppress the thoughts and have fun – he could tell them another time, when he was more at ease with the situation. Of course, he was likely to change his mind and not tell them at all, but what did that matter anyway? He would certainly look back on this night and regret not having told anyone, but, again, what did it matter? He was stuck in Pallet for at least another year and a half to finish school, he wasn't about to risk screwing up the relationship he had with his friends by coming out of the closet.

Somehow the alcohol had allowed him to have this drawn-out train of thought over some period of time. Unfortunately, while it brought some clarity, it also brought stupidity and that stupidity was what would change everything.

It started when May Oak came over and the other boys came to a mutual agreement that seeing the girls downstairs was more important than whatever they had been doing for the past few hours. Gary had been hesitant to leave Darren's bedroom – for one thing, May would make him drink, it was no question of _if_, it was a question of _how much_ and of _what_. He didn't care much for alcohol in the first place – the line between having fun and being sick was much too thin; he knew this quite well after having seen Wyatt and Darren both drink themselves to point of vomiting all over themselves. Regardless, even he wasn't immune to the annoyances of peer pressure. If taking a shot or two (or was he up to five now?) would get people to back off, then Gary was up to it.

As Gary and the other boys made their way into the living room, May caught his eye and frowned before heading towards the kitchen, presumably to grab another drink. The friend that May had been speaking to, Darren's elder sister, glanced over at the boys, saw Gary, and smiled flirtatiously as she sauntered over. Gary resisted the urge to roll his eyes and tell her to get lost – he didn't feel like dealing with her flirting, or anyone's flirting for that matter. It was an annoying waste of time for any of the pathetic girls to flirt with him; though if Tracey had decided to flirt with him… Well, he wasn't quite so opposed to that situation, however unlikely it was. Unfortunately, it was rather impossible to even pretend that the blonde girl who was heading his way had been replaced by the quiet pokemon watcher.

"Christ, Amanda, would you stop trying to get my friends to sleep with you?" Darren groaned as his sister approached Gary. He rolled his eyes dramatically and stalked off when the girl ignored him in favor of conversation.

To Gary's surprise, the conversation wasn't entirely composed of mindless flirting; for once, Amanda was interested in other things – the research he had been doing in place of the science classes at school, why he hadn't been spending so much time with his friends lately… And whether or not he had a girlfriend, a question that she already knew the answer too. Gary knew that, despite the conversation, the end goal was the same as ever: hook up with May's attractive, smart, popular little brother and possibly secure a romantic relation with him. The thought alone made Gary mildly nauseous, though he had to wonder if that feeling wasn't because of the way the alcohol combined with the smell of recently delivered pizza were making his stomach churn. On one hand, he desperately wanted to escape the conversation, to simply brush off the charming smiles and saccharine giggles and find a way to direct Amanda's attention to any of the other males in the room. But on the other hand, some idiotic part of him wanted to take advantage of the situation by kissing the girl and maybe going a bit further than that. Maybe being with a girl would raise his level of attraction to them, maybe being with just one of the girls would make the rest of May's friends and the girls at school stop flirting with him. Hell, maybe seeing him kiss the hottest girl in Pallet would distract his friends from the occasional lingering glance on members of the same sex.

"Eat this," May's voice suddenly commanded, cutting through the drunken contemplations. Gary glanced at his sister, slightly confused by her unexpected appearance, and saw that she was holding a paper plate with a slice of pizza on it. May sighed when he frowned and declined, "You are _trashed_, I can tell. Eat it and sober up before you hurl or do something stupid."

"Go away," was the irritable response as Gary shrugged off her concern. He was fine, maybe a bit drunk but definitely not _trashed_; why did he need to listen to his older sister? She said his name sharply and reached up to grasp his shoulder, obviously intent on reversing the effects of the alcohol. For the first time since leaving his house earlier that day, the calm demeanor that Gary usually took on around his friends cracked and he snapped at his sister to back off.

"Fine!" May's surprise and spontaneous anger were both apparent in her crisp tone as she turned on her heel and headed back towards the kitchen. "Don't bitch to me when Grandpa takes your car away for getting drunk with your friends when you're supposed to be helping in the lab, you spoiled brat," she hissed under her breath, ignoring her brother's venomous glare.

Once she was out of earshot, Gary grumbled under his breath. The thing that annoyed him was that _she_ was the one always bugging him to have a drink and relax a bit, yet now May was scolding him for doing exactly that. _There's always payback_, he thought mischievously before turning his attention back to the blonde girl in front of him. Would it really be terrible to flirt back with his sister's best friend if it would annoy May? Annoying his older sister was certainly one of Gary's favorite hobbies. Now his thoughts regarding Amanda were starting to contradict the earlier ones.

Flirting with Amanda only took a small amount of concentration, when he wasn't focusing on her, Gary glanced around the room at his friends. Darren and Adrian had retreated to the couch nearby and were occasionally shooting them glances – Adrian's holding a small amount of jealousy and encouragement while Darren's were mildly annoyed, yet amused. Wyatt had disappeared from sight but Gary could distinctly hear his intoxicated laugh coming from the direction of the kitchen. Mike's girlfriend had shown up within the last half hour and the two of them were currently making out in an arm chair a few feet away from where Gary was standing. Chase and Brandon were shooting him sly looks every few moments, occasionally mouthing encouragement, rolling their eyes disappointedly whenever Gary fixed them with a glare.

The backing was there – he could easily kiss her and his friends, fools that they could be, would never question his sexuality, ever. Still, there was a feeling of impending doom; going along with the encouragement would easily be the stupidest thing he had ever done, and yet, this far into the act, it seemed like the only escape.

After awhile, Wyatt reappeared, his blonde hair mussed and cheeks flushed while he held several shot glasses filled with a darker liquid than Gary had seen any of his friends with throughout the night. One of the glasses was quickly passed off to Gary as the other boy leaned in and murmured, "Come on, man, she's the hottest babe in Pallet and she wants to fuck you." The words were slurred and the scent of rum on his breath was strong, yet Wyatt's sudden closeness, combined with his warm breath tickling Gary's ear, aroused him and made him want to drag his friend off to a bedroom and… well, the fantasies were enough to bring an embarrassed flush to Gary's face.

One final, suggestive glance from Chase was all it took. The shot was downed – the first bad idea, considering Gary had just seen Darren pointedly decline a shot of the same liquid. The strong taste black licorice nearly made Gary choke and gag, but he managed to swallow the drink without immediately vomiting it back up, despite feeling queasy and sick to his stomach.

Amanda grinned, seeming proud of the way Gary had handled the strong drink, and slipped her hand to the back of his neck, fingers sliding into his hair as she leaned closer. Still turned on by the unexpected fantasies involving Wyatt, Gary closed the distance between them, pressing his lips to hers and barely having a second to process his actions before she deepened the kiss. Her tongue slipped into his mouth and she moaned softly, her experienced lips working fiercely against his.

A small, nagging part of his brain instantly told Gary that this had been his second mistake though it took him a few seconds longer to realize that he was in way over his head. Already nauseous, the surge of adrenaline from kissing her caused the sick feeling to intensify, and it didn't help that he could taste the same strong, licorice-tasting alcohol on Amanda. What caused the queasiness to keep rising was the movement of her tongue in his mouth; the slick, foreign appendage feeling almost snake-like in his mouth. Eager to get past the unpleasant parts of the experience, Gary's mind brought up unbidden suggestions: _Pretend it's Wyatt, Darren, Adrian, _anyone_ else!_

Gary had a sudden mental image of Mike and his girlfriend groping on the nearby armchair, except Mike was replaced with Gary and his girlfriend with Darren. The image was shocking enough to force him to pull back, and the situation was disturbing enough to send him reeling out of the room and towards the stairs, which he rushed up, heading for the bathroom in the hallway next to Darren's bedroom. He barely made it to the room in time to empty his roiling stomach into the toilet.

... ... ...

"What the fuck did I just do?" Gary groaned, trying to calm down and recover from everything that had happened maybe ten minutes prior.

"It's called puking. You tend not to do it too often unless –"

"Shut up, Wyatt!" The other boy, who had just appeared in the bathroom doorway, simply shrugged off the abuse and wandered off down the hall. Groaning again, Gary leaned against the bathroom wall and closed his eyes, fighting off nausea, guilt, and some other feeling that he couldn't quite place. It felt almost as though he had betrayed himself in some way by kissing Amanda – not to mention betraying his best friend by kissing his, Darren's, sister, as well as May by kissing her best friend.

As he was trying to work out a way to deal with the situation, Darren appeared in the doorway, seeming a bit worried. "Are you alright?" he asked quietly, closing the door behind him as he leaned against the counter, his drink from earlier still in hand.

"I just want to go home right now." Gary shook his head slightly, regretting the move almost immediately as a wave of dizziness nearly overtook him.

"Hmmm," Darren appeared to think about it for a short moment but Gary could tell that he was being sarcastic. "Not happening. Your grandfather would kill me. And you, too, actually," he added as an afterthought.

"At this point, I wouldn't mind that so much." The words were out of his mouth before he had even thought about them and Gary found himself surprised. He could admit to being depressed in the past few weeks or even months, but didn't this count as a somewhat suicidal thought? He pushed the thought away; it had to be the alcohol affecting him. There was no way things had gone _that_ far, he was simply being dramatic and was overreacting to everything that had happened downstairs.

While Gary passed the off confession somewhat casually, Darren wasn't so easily deterred. "Are you sure you're okay?" he asked with a frown, unsure of what to make of what Gary had said.

"I'm fine… I just can't believe I did that."

Darren sighed and shrugged. "Heh, you kissed my sister – that's more innocent than some of the other things people do. Hell, Wyatt keeps a picture of her in a bikini on his wall –"

"Yeah, and he jerks off to it every night," Gary shot at him. It was a stupid thing to irritate him, that, he knew even if he was drunk. Still, he simply wanted to be like his friends and be able to say that he liked girls in the same way. No matter how many times he told himself that he did, it was a terrible lie and it was entirely in vain.

"More often than that," Darren pointed out.

The bitter response had thrown him off slightly but he felt as though he was starting to hone in on what was bothering Gary. He had told Tracey that he had an idea of what was bothering Gary; this was true and there was a reason behind it. The boys had grown up together and there had been more than one hint, however small, that there was a major difference between them. As much as he wanted to bring it up with Gary, he knew all too well how stubborn the other teen was – Gary was simply the type of person that had to do what he wanted whenever he was ready to do it. Talking to other friends about it was out of the question as well, considering it would be an act of betrayal. Finally, Darren sighed again; there was nothing he could do right now, especially not when he was standing in a small bathroom with plenty of alcohol in his system and even more in the cup that he had brought in with him.

"I'm going back downstairs," he announced. "Come down if you want but you know everyone's going to be asking about the kiss. If you want to change and go to bed, you know where the clothes are." With that he left, leaving Gary behind to contemplate what to do. In the end, he chose to head to bed and sleep it off. Of course, that didn't exactly go as planned.

Just changing into a pair of pajama pants was difficult enough to make Gary wonder exactly how much alcohol his friends had slipped him throughout the night. It must have been a lot more than he originally thought, considering the clock now read well past midnight when it had last read only a little past nine. What had happened to the time? For that matter, what had happened to the relaxed, cheerful feeling that had emerged earlier in the night? It had been swiftly replaced with a tense and miserable feeling that threatened to overwhelm him.

Sitting alone in Darren's large bedroom, there were no distractions from the jumble of feelings. Looking around the room, searching for distractions only made things worse by bringing up memories from the many years of friendship between him and the other boys. The room was a mess from everyone being in there for hours and he could recall the days when the room would be filled with toys strewn across the floor from a long day of playing. He could remember the nearly-daily play-fights with plastic swords and mock pokemon battles that so often ended with even more play-fighting. If he remembered correctly, Ash still had a scar on his arm from a sword fight; it hadn't mattered back then because they had always played rough, resulting in so many scrapes and bruises. Darren's drum set sat in one of the corners, now with a few abandoned drinks scattered across the floor toms and the snare drum. He had first gotten the set when the boys were around nine years old and Gary's natural competitive streak had led him to play with the drum set, determined to become better than his best friend at it. He had never beaten Darren at the instrument but was now nearly as good as the other boy – he had once used this fact as ammunition against Ash, eventually leading to a fight that Mike and Adrian had been forced to break up. One of the walls of the room had a mural of a Charizard on it; he had helped draw it years ago, back when he and Ash were terrible rivals. Ash had been in town and had helped as well since he was great friends with Darren and the other boys as well and Gary had constantly found snide ways to pick on him until Darren became so frustrated that he had burst into tears and punched Gary for it. Few would believe it now but Darren had always been highly sensitive and it had, on several occasions, brought out a softer, sweeter side to Gary that very few people ever saw.

A feeling of betrayal welled up in Gary – he had betrayed several people close to him and it ate away at him. He had betrayed Ash, who had once been like a little brother to him, simply because of a confused crush. Poor Ash had been tormented so much by him that their friendship was beyond repair, a thought that left Gary even more miserable. He wished he could take the harsh words back and admit to Ash _why_ he had done everything, but his pride was far too strong for that. He had betrayed Darren by kissing his sister, someone that he had grown up with, and by doing so he had also betrayed May. Flirting with Amanda was meant to be a mild annoyance toward May but Gary had gotten so caught up in the act, so pressured by the quiet encouragement of his friends, so intoxicated by the ridiculous amount of alcohol that he had lost all common sense and kissed the girl. May was certain to be pissed at him, to say the least and Gary did not fancy seeing her the next day. He didn't particularly feel like facing anyone the next day; in fact, he felt more like crawling into a hole and dying than facing his friends and sister. Facing his grandfather with a hangover was certain to be an especially hellish ordeal, as well.

The thoughts kept swirling through Gary's head, breaking through the fog that the alcohol had created. He felt terrible and could feel his eyes prickling with unwelcome tears though he refused to let them fall – he was far stronger than this, he wasn't about to cry because he had gotten drunk and kissed a girl and then became nostalgic. It wasn't going to happen, it just wasn't. He hadn't cried in years, save for the time he had been bitten by an Arbok, but that had been perhaps the most painful experience in his life, a few shed tears were understandable in that situation.

His resolve was fast abandoning him and he soon felt the first tears fall. Sighing sharply and forcing down a sob, Gary pressed his palms to his eyes, willing them to stop tearing. The gesture didn't work and more tears began falling at a faster rate. Feeling utterly lost and helpless, Gary slipped under the covers on the bed and buried his face in one of the pillows, finally allowing himself this one breakdown in the solitude of the empty bedroom. Confusion had been constantly building in him over the past months; he was confused about why he had ever pushed away his closest friend, he was confused about the way his hormones could turn innocent encounters with his friends into smutty dreams that left him feeling sick in the mornings when he awoke, he was confused about Tracey and the strange feelings he felt around the other boy…

He was finally beginning to calm down a bit when the bedroom door opened and closed quietly and soft, hesitant footsteps approached the bed. Gary stiffened, immediately worried about who was now in the room with him. He figured it was Darren or one of his other friends and quickly feigned sleep until the person sat on the edge of the bed closest to him and placed a hand on his arm. Long, slender fingers slid from his arm to his hair, gently tousling the dark strands as a soft, feminine sigh sounded from above him.

"Sweetie…" Another sigh sounded and a warm weight was draped over him. Opening his eyes, Gary could see red tendrils falling into his face – May's latest dye job – as his sister leaned over him, murmuring soft words of comfort.

"What's wrong?" May asked after a few moments. Gary only shook his head, keeping his face buried in the pillow in front of him; there was no way he was letting May see how upset he was, even if he was sure that she already had some idea. With another sigh, May pressed on, "You haven't been yourself lately, anyone can see that something's up." She paused and adopted a different approach when there was no response. "You shouldn't drink so much when there's something bothering you. The alcohol will only make it worse - having a drink or two will make you relax and cheer up a bit. I know the difference between being tipsy and being drunk, Gary. You're too inexperienced to know that and Wyatt's too self-centered to understand how it can affect people other than him – I can't believe he gave you a shot of Jager. No wonder you got sick."

Gary sighed and wished she would stop talking. Her presence was somewhat comforting but the chatter was making his head hurt more than it had before she came into the room. Surprisingly, she seemed to understand the wish behind the sigh and fell silent, settling for running her hand through his hair and pressing a soft kiss against his temple. Somehow the motion of May's fingers in his hair relaxed Gary enough to start feeling drowsiness seep into his brain, finally chasing away some of the feelings he had been dealing with before May's appearance. May waited until she was certain that he was asleep before kissing him again, murmuring a soft "I love you," and leaving the room quietly.

After closing the bedroom door behind her, May found herself face-to-face with Darren. "You're right, he is upset," she declared, crossing her arms wearily.

"Did he talk to you?" Darren asked.

"What do you think?"

Darren rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Too stubborn; he won't talk to anyone, I'll bet. I'm pretty sure the reason behind the kiss had absolutely nothing to do with Amanda, though." May snorted softly and nodded in agreement. "What do you think is going on with him?"

"I think he's gay," May admitted after a moment of hesitation.

It was only a slight surprise to her when Darren slowly nodded. "I think he's confused and too damn proud to do anything to make things better for himself. Tracey seems like he knows something we don't."

"I'll get him to talk to Gary tomorrow. Maybe he can get some juicy gossip out of the brat." May grinned and rubbed her hands together in mock excitement. She dropped her hands and rolled her eyes when Darren frowned. "It was a joke," she defended. "If it were true, I would only tell Grampy and that's only because I know he would talk some sense into Gary, get him to stop being so secretive."

A small sigh escaped Darren and he leaned tiredly against the wall behind him. "I'm going to bed. Hopefully Tracey can get through to him."

May simply nodded her head and headed back down the hall, intending on walking back home for some damage control. Gary was supposed to help out in the lab the next afternoon and May was under the impression that this was something that just wasn't going to happen. She also needed to somehow tell Tracey to offer her brother some sort of support without _actually_ telling him.

This was not going to be an easy night.

... ... ...


	8. Chapter 7

**Secrets Kept**

I had to live up to the metal name in this chapter, hence the Amon Amarth bit. I can't help it - I haven't updated _BtW_ in sooo long and that's my metal story! *Sigh* Something else to work on over summer. Anyway, I'm hoping to be able to keep updating this every two weeks, but we shall see how that goes.

Thanks to Defiant Vixen as always! I know how you feel with the alcohol part; having alcoholics in the family makes it tough to watch friends make idiots of themselves with alcohol. Tracey should totally charge for his services – I think you might have given me some ideas with this review! : )

Chapter Seven

The next morning came without event, save for a fitful sleep that was accentuated by dreams that often bordered on nightmarish. It was early when Gary awoke to sunlight pouring in through the windows and he lay there for a long while, trying desperately to go back to sleep. The only thing Gary wanted to do now was sleep. His head was throbbing and the soft light filling the room was hurting his eyes while he still felt remnants from the previous night's nausea. The last time he had felt this sick was the last time May had tried to make chicken for dinner and had inadvertently given both Gary and Tracey food poisoning.

Finally realizing that there was no way he was going to be able to sleep any more, Gary groaned and sat up to peer around the room. Most of the boys were spread out, sound asleep; Darren was sprawled out next to him and Chase had somehow managed to curl up at the foot of the bed, almost like Umbreon would often do at home. Brandon was sprawled out on the floor across the room, head resting on Mike's legs; Gary smirked slightly at the sight – he could just imagine the panic the two would experience when they woke up like that. Heaven forbid two teenage boys touch even slightly when they were passed out after a long night of partying. Mike was by far the most homophobic of the group and it was more than likely that he wouldn't speak to Brandon for a week after this. Gary was almost tempted to wake up Brandon and warn him to move but in the end decided to let him deal with the consequences of their sleeping positions. After all, didn't he have to deal with the consequences of kissing Amanda?

Suddenly desperate to get out of the room, Gary stood and, in his haste to leave, nearly fell over Adrian, who was curled up on the floor next to the bed. Adrian stirred and opened his eyes long enough to glare sleepily at Gary before going back to sleep. Gary muttered a quick apology before stepping over his friend and heading towards the door. He couldn't be irritated at Adrian for sleeping in a place where Gary was certain to trip over him: a sleepy Adrian was too cute to be angry at. Gary shook his head at the thought and immediately regretted it. This was definitely going to be a hellish day.

Though his intention was to get dressed and head straight home, it was quite awhile before Gary made it home that morning. A large part of the delay had to do with Wyatt being passed out in the bathroom and, of course, being the only one awake, Gary had been the one to make sure that he was still breathing and wasn't likely to choke on his own vomit. As far as cleaning up the semi-dried vomit all over the bathroom floor… Well, after encouraging him to kiss Amanda the night before, Gary figured that leaving Wyatt with the humiliation of waking up covered in his own vomit and then having to clean it up was an apt punishment for being a total idiot.

Once he entered his house, it only took May a moment to appear in the doorway of the kitchen with a plate of blackened squares that Gary could only assume were supposed to be toast.

"I made breakfast!" she exclaimed cheerfully. She glanced down at the plate and back up at her brother. "Well… Sort of. There's another batch in the toaster since this one is... I could've made scrambled eggs but I figured the smell would make you nauseous." Gary rolled his eyes and stalked off towards the stairs, ignoring May as she looked back down at the plate. "I knew I should have had Tracey make breakfast," May sighed and turned back towards the kitchen.

… … …

It hadn't been a surprise to Tracey when May approached him that morning and hinted that she would like him to speak with her brother. The girl had seemed mildly concerned over the past few weeks and that concern seemed to have evolved into full-blown worry overnight. She didn't make it obvious, in fact, she seemed to be attempting to cover it up while trying to act normally but Tracey wasn't about to fall for that. He could tell just by taking in May's subtle body language that something had happened; she was breathing faster than usual, her skin was paler than usual, and she was so restless that Tracey was certain if Gary had been acting like himself that he would have been teasing her with some nickname involving the word 'twitchy.' Of course, if Gary had been acting like himself, Tracey was sure that May wouldn't be quite so worked up.

Either way, he found himself once more standing in front of a closed bedroom door, wondering what to say. By now it was late afternoon and Gary's absence had been noted by the professor, only to be blamed on teenage laziness. A sound behind him made Tracey look up to see Umbreon meandering lazily towards Gary's room. She stopped next to Tracey and rubbed her head against his leg before nudging the door open with her nose; Tracey hadn't even noticed that the door was partially open.

Once inside the room, Umbreon sauntered over to the bed, grabbed the blanket in her teeth, and pulled with a growl that elicited a sleepy groan from Gary, who was curled beneath the thick comforter on the bed. Shaking his head, Tracey crossed the room and opened the curtains, causing Gary to groan again.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Tracey glanced back over at the bed and shook his head again; Gary had pulled one of the pillows over his head while Umbreon continued to tug on the blanket. He probably figured that it was May who had entered the bedroom.

"It's snowing again." Tracey leaned against the wall next to the window and crossed his arms loosely. "It would be nice to go outside and enjoy it, don't you think?"

He heard the sheets on the bed rustle and glanced over to see Gary sitting up and rubbing his face tiredly. "I thought you were May," Gary muttered. Umbreon dropped the blanket and jumped up on the bed, happily rubbing her face against Gary's.

"I figured. Looks like someone missed you."

"She's probably the only one that even noticed I was gone."

Tracey raised his eyebrows slightly and was forced to suppress an uncharacteristic scoff. Did Gary really think that nobody in the house cared about him? The teenage angst was fast getting on his nerves but he kept his cool. "You'd be surprised how quiet the house is when you're not around; I can actually hear my radio without your music drowning it out. Forgive me, but I'm not a fan of music that sounds like someone who's demonically possessed wrote and recorded it all." Much to his surprise, a small smile curved Gary's lips.

"You'd think I'm a Cannibal Corpse fan with the way you're going on about it," he replied dryly.

Tracey shook his head again, unable to understand why anyone would like a band with a name like that. He picked up a CD case from the desk near him and examined the cover. "Instead you like… I have no idea how to pronounce that name."

"Amon Amarth."

"What language is that? German?" Tracey set aside the case and returned his attention to Gary, who was scratching Umbreon behind the ears.

"Sindarin, actually."

Tracey blinked and stared at him for a moment before laughing. "Seriously?" Gary nodded. "_Elvish_? Lord of the Rings?" Another nod and Tracey burst into laughter. "What do they sing about? How gorgeous Legolas is?" Tracey teased. Gary laughed softly and Tracey felt a surge of delight flood through him. _Success!_ he thought cheerfully.

"Oh, Tracey's got a crush on Orlando Bloom? Tell that to May and you'll have a friend for life."

"Was I right?"

Gary rolled his eyes and shook his head, wincing at the dull ache that the movement caused. "The music's about Vikings."

Tracey raised his eyebrows again and managed not to laugh. "Never pictured you as the Viking type. From what I hear, they generally hold their alcohol better." Gary visibly tensed at the words and Tracey could tell that he had gotten his attention but he continued as though nothing had happened. "You can tell when they're really trashed because then they start fighting each other with swords. I guess that's kind of what straight teenage guys do when they drink though: do stupid things to show off to the girls. I would stick out like a sore thumb at one of those parties. Something wrong?" he added, noticing that Gary had stopped petting Umbreon and was watching him almost suspiciously.

"What did you hear about last night?"

Tracey shrugged. "Nothing." He was being almost honest; May had only mentioned that Gary had gotten sick and had seemed upset about something. The last part had been rather obvious, considering the way Gary had hidden out in his bedroom all day, even skipping lunch. "Why? What happened?"

"Who says anything happened?"

"No one. I was just assuming since you've been moping around up here all day that something must have happened. And now you're being defensive so that kind of confirms it." Gary said nothing. "Seriously, what happened?"

"Nothing happened. I got drunk and threw up. End of story."

"What did you do when you were drunk?" Tracey pressed.

"Nothing!"

By now Tracey was certain that something had happened just by the way Gary was avoiding the question. "Did you tell your friends?"

"Tell them what?" Gary asked defensively. Tracey calmly raised an eyebrow but said nothing. "Tell them what, Tracey?" Gary repeated, the defensiveness draining from him voice only to be replaced by worry.

"I think you know," Tracey replied softly. He uncrossed his arms and sat down in the desk chair, trying to get comfortable.

Gary hesitated, dropping his gaze to the dark blanket on the bed. "You know?" he asked after a moment. Tracey nodded. "How?"

Tracey gave a small shrug and sighed softly. "I've been through it; it's not that hard to recognize when someone else is going through the same thing."

"It's not the same thing."

"Not _exactly_ the same – it wasn't so rough for me – but it's the same scenario. Getting confused about weird thoughts or dreams, wondering why you can't feel the same way as your friends, trying to figure out what it all means… Worrying what would happen if your friends knew how you felt – would they ditch you or would they stay by your side? Same with family; except with family it's even worse. They're supposed to love you unconditionally but –"

"Stop!" Tracey paused at the sudden outburst. "I hear it enough in my head, I don't need you saying it out loud."

Tracey nodded, now they were getting somewhere. "So… What happened?"

"You're not going to let this go, are you?" Gary asked, sounding a bit put out.

"If it's bothering you enough to make you act like this, then no."

Gary sighed dramatically but finally met Tracey's eyes. "I kissed Darren's sister; happy now?"

Tracey smiled slightly at the revelation and fought to not look as surprised has he actually was. "Now was that so hard?" Gary simply glared at him, which caused Tracey to laugh softly. "I was joking," he explained, leaning back in his seat. "Well, how was your first kiss?"

"Who said it was my first kiss?"

"We're being defensive again," Tracey pointed out, causing Gary to groan loudly. "It was that bad, huh?"

"It's probably what caused me to puke in the first place." Tracey pulled a face at the comment; if that was the truth, then it was no wonder that Gary was so upset. "What?"

Tracey shrugged and forced his face back to neutral. "Remind me to never kiss you; I'm not particularly big on vomit as a fetish, just so you know."

"I'll bear that in mind should we ever decide to screw around," Gary retorted dryly.

"And I'll remember that you don't like kissing. Is that really what was bothering you so badly?" Tracey frowned when Gary's response was yet another sigh. "Stop sighing! If you don't want people to know that you're gay then you're going to have to stop being so dramatic," he chastised lightly.

Gary chose to ignore the last comment and answered Tracey's question instead. "It wasn't just that," he admitted after a moment of hesitation. For a moment he looked ready to say something but then suddenly frowned and shook his head. "Forget it."

"Not happening," Tracey replied firmly. It was obvious that he was starting to both get on Gary's nerves and get through to him. The way Gary glared at him and picked irritably at a lose string on the blanket showed the annoyance quite plainly but the fact that he seemed to be on the verge of talking about it showed that Tracey was getting to him. _Maybe if I annoy him enough, he'll actually speak. _

"You're stubborn," Gary observed in a clipped voice that served as another proof of annoyance.

"_You're_ the stubborn one, Gary," Tracey pointed out. "I'm only being persistent because that's what it takes. It's what friends do." The glare that he received in return was not at all surprising. He shrugged it off and continued, unfazed by Gary's behavior. "Being stubborn is only going to make you more depressed. It does more harm than good." With that, he stood and started to leave the room, explaining that he needed to help May cook dinner. He was nearly at the door when Gary spoke up.

"It's just frustrating." Tracey turned to face him but said nothing. "Every day, it's something new; someone likes some new girl, someone has girlfriend issues, someone has some new issue."

"Gary –"

"I'm not stupid," Gary interrupted. "I know it's hard for anyone and I know everyone has their own problems – I mean, Wyatt has so many family issues, it's not even funny. That's why he's always getting trashed. I just wish it wasn't like this."

Tracey nodded slowly, thinking over what Gary had just said. "It is hard," he agreed. "But keeping it a secret and pushing people away will only make it harder." Gary kept his eyes on Umbreon, seeming to pay more attention to petting her than to listening to Tracey and Tracey had to wonder if he was even listening to him in the first place. With a slight shake of the head, Tracey opened the door and started to leave again. He had just stepped into the hallway when Gary called his name.

Gary didn't look up from Umbreon, even when Tracey stuck his head back into the room. "Thank you," he said softly.

Mildly surprised, Tracey smiled. "Any time," he replied lightly. He left the room and heard Gary groan and flop back against the pillows on his bed as he pulled the door closed behind him. Sighing softly, Tracey leaned against the wall behind him for a moment; he still needed to go downstairs and help May with dinner but after the conversation with Gary, he felt that he needed a few minutes to gather his thoughts.

It was surprising for Gary to be so open with him and he wondered if it was simply because the younger boy physically felt so lousy or if there was something else going on. Seeing Gary so down was difficult, Tracey had realized with a slight shock. Even in past weeks, when Gary had still been rather miserable, his eyes had always been brighter and it was rare that Tracey couldn't get at least a half smile out of him. Now that the smile - or even that mildly irritating smirk that was often present - was absent, he realized how much he enjoyed seeing them. Even Gary's voice was different: it was soft, almost hollow and it pained Tracey to hear a friend's voice sound like that.

Somehow, Tracey wasn't entirely surprised about the way he felt regarding Gary's behavior. He had felt a bit of a crush forming since the summer and he had certainly noticed the good looks and intelligence every time that they had met before Gary had moved back to Pallet. Now he realized that it was more than just a little bit of a crush forming: he was attracted to Gary – very much so. Part of him wanted to go back into the bedroom, give him a hug, maybe a small kiss on the cheek, and tell him that everything would be just fine with some time. Of course, he knew he couldn't do that.

This was Gary's problem, not his, and because of that, Tracey knew that he couldn't interfere. The most he could do was be a good friend and lend a sympathetic ear when necessary. This situation was already difficult enough without the added pressure of a relationship. There was no way this could go beyond a friendship. Besides, it would be quite awkward to date the grandson of his mentor and boss.

… … …


	9. Chapter 8

**Secrets Kept**

As you can see, I definitely did not manage the whole updating every two weeks deal. I hope that a longer chapter makes up for the delay! It's amazing that I had more time to write when I was in school than I do when I'm graduated! I hope to be able to update more often, but I won't make any promises, considering I just got my first teaching job out of college and I have to move into an apartment over an hour away from where I currently live. It's going to take awhile to get settled in…

Anyway, I should warn that this chapter is a bit more mature than the others though there really isn't much "action" in that scene…

Thank you to everyone who reviewed, especially Defiant Vixen, who is always kind enough to write such nice things! : )

Chapter Eight

Tracey would have liked to think that talking to Gary had helped matters but, nearly six months later, summer was fast approaching and Gary's mood had yet to improve. Part of the reason behind this, Tracey was sure, was the fact that the professor had forever been on the teen's case about something: a shirked chore, a broken curfew, a skipped class, a mysterious illness that happened to coincide with a night spent at a friend's house. Tracey had heard it so many times that even he was sick of hearing it. May seemed to always be hovering nearby, always inquiring about the same things that Professor Oak was constantly lecturing Gary about.

Those were just a few of the external factors that were obviously affecting Gary's behavior. It seemed that there was always some sort of little quarrel going on between him and at least one of his friends, partly because Gary was frequently blowing off plans with them. There had been many times when Tracey found himself somewhat annoyed with the other boy after hearing him claim to one of his friends that he didn't feel well or was busy when Tracey knew the only thing bothering him was something that would never go away, unlike these phantom illnesses and homework assignments that provided him with excuses.

This wasn't to say that Gary didn't speak to him about what was going on, to Tracey's surprise, it was quite the opposite. He always seemed to find a reason to talk to Tracey, whether it was inquiries about the happenings in the lab (even though Tracey knew that Gary knew the answers to his own questions), venting about everything going on, or normal, casual conversation. The latter was Tracey's favorite instance – it was when Gary's true personality showed and Tracey couldn't help but love the glimpses he would catch of it. The dry sense of humor, combined with the vast knowledge of and interest in many different subjects made these conversations fun and interesting. It was a stark contrast to the grievances of a stubborn, depressed teenager, or even Gary's curiosities about the lab. The boy knew exactly what happened in the lab from day to day, making it obvious to Tracey that these instances were either a desperate attempt to distract himself from whatever troubles were ailing him that day or an attempt to engage Tracey in conversation.

Over the course of the months, Tracey had come to recognize the fact he did, in fact, have a crush on the younger teen. It didn't bother him in the slightest – crushes happened, there wasn't anything he could really do about it. What did bother him was knowing that his crush was, _for once_, gay and also liked him but had worked himself into such a state of agony over the situation that there was no chance of acting on the mutual attraction.

_Not publically, at least_, Tracey thought to himself as he absentmindedly fed some of the grass pokemon out on the ranch late one morning. He shook his head, semi-amused by the thought.

"The last thing you want is a secret relationship," he chastised himself lightly. A confused squeak came from the ground near his feet and Tracey looked down at Marril with a soft smile. "Yep, I'm talking to you, buddy," he said, kneeling down to pet his little pokemon. "I know all about your secret relationship with Pookie," he continued, referring to May's irritable little Meowth. Marril wrinkled his nose and gave his trainer a disgusted look that make Tracey burst into laughter. "I'm kidding."

From his place on a hilltop, Tracey could see a familiar Jeep pull into the driveway and he couldn't help but smile while he wondered vaguely what Gary was doing home from school so early. Marril gave an unhappy squeak that made Tracey roll his eyes and give the blue mouse a stern look. For some reason, Gary's attitude seemed to rub the normally sweet pokemon the wrong way.

"I don't know why you hate him so much, Marril," Tracey sighed as he straightened and picked up the bucket of food that he had brought with him out to the hill that they were standing on. "He's always been nice to you, he even gives you his leftover food… Well, when Umbreon and Arcanine aren't around, at least."

From the driveway came the sound of a car door being slammed rather hard. Marril looked towards the direction of the sound and then looked up at Tracey with a smug expression.

"Maybe the car was being mean to him," Tracey told the pokemon lightly. An indignant squeak was the response. "Come on, Marril, he's just going through a rough time right now. Of course, he wouldn't be if he hadn't locked himself in the closet and thrown away the key…" Marril peered up at him, looking perplexed, and Tracey smiled a bit grimly. "It's just a figure of speech, buddy; I know he's not locked in an actual closet."

An unbidden thought came to Tracey's head. _Being able to act on his feelings would make him happier_. He pushed the thought out of mind and started heading towards the back door of the house, intent on grabbing a snack from the kitchen before starting on the next set of chores.

… … …

The front door slammed loudly, the sound quickly followed by the sound of breaking glass, a frightened hiss, and a curse all from kitchen. May sighed as she kneeled to pick up the glass that she had dropped before turning her attention to the shaking Meowth that was now cowering under the kitchen table.

"Why couldn't I have been an only child?" she muttered to herself, pulling a can of tuna out of a cabinet to coax her pet Meowth out with. The little cat crawled out from under the table and rubbed it's face against her calf before streaking back under the table as Gary entered the room, tossing his backpack onto an empty chair before dropping into another chair. May rolled her eyes and placed the tuna can back on the counter, giving up on the cat. "Good morning, sunshine," she greeted sarcastically. Gary barely spared her a tired glance in response. "How were your exams?" she asked as Tracey came in through the back door with Marril at his heels.

"I think I failed calculus," Gary admitted miserably. Tracey and May both rolled their eyes.

"That's what you said about chemistry, too," Tracey pointed out, pulling a can of soda from the refrigerator.

"And, let me guess, you got an eighty-nine in that class and you're annoyed that it won't be rounded up to an A?" May asked sardonically. Gary's silence served only as a confirmation to her comment.

"I'm sure you did fine," Tracey reassured Gary.

"Well, let's hope so, or else you'll be hearing about it from Grampy for next ten years."

Tracey suppressed a groan at May's offhand comment. Mentioning the ever-so-slight decline in Gary's grades was just one of the many things that could set the teen off these days. Simple comments, like May's, could so easily lead to an irritable outburst, which would likely lead to an even more depressed mood for the remainder of the week. It was something Tracey had seen too often lately.

"Oh yeah, because I have nothing better to do than spend my entire day practicing derivatives," Gary snapped.

"Really? Are you sure about that, squirt? You've been spending a lot of time doing absolutely nothing lately."

Gary hesitated, eyes narrowed as he considered his sister for a moment. Tracey reached under the table to pick up Marril before he could cause any mischief with May's Meowth; his hand accidently brushed Gary's leg as he did so and the move was enough to jerk Gary out of his thoughts and respond. "I've had things on my mind," he admitted with a shrug and a half-glance at Tracey.

"Like the fact that all of your friends have girlfriends, except for you?" May asked a bit too sweetly. Gary's eyes narrowed further and Tracey wondered briefly if he was going to have to step in and break this up. "Of course, I'm not at all surprised that Mike has managed to hook such a pretty little thing. That boy's so damn insecure about his sexuality that he just _has _to outdo everyone else. I'm telling you, he's a fairy in disguise."

Gary looked to be on the verge of shooting some nasty response at her but Tracey cut him off before he could even open his mouth. "Hate to break it to you, May, but my gay-dar does not go off around him," he spoke up lightly.

May smiled. "Maybe it's broken."

"My gay-dar is infallible, May," Tracey replied with a laugh. The girl laughed at that and left the room without another word, her brother rolling his eyes at her retreating form. A moment passed while May's footsteps sounded on the staircase and Tracey waited until he heard her bedroom door close before turning to Gary.

"We've been over this already," Gary sighed, seeming to know what Tracey had been about to say.

Tracey sighed and remembered the most recent conversation between him and Gary. Indeed, they had been over it many times.

"_You could always tell May. She has gay friends: you know she wouldn't care."_

"_Right. There's just that little issue with her not being able to keep her mouth shut. She would tell Amanda, who would tell Darren, who would tell Wyatt –"_

"_Gary, do you really think they would be so bothered by it?"_

"_You don't understand, Trace! We've been friends since we were _two_!"_

"_That's the point! Darren and Wyatt wouldn't betray you, and I can't see Adrian or Chase betraying you –"_

"_You have no idea how Mike is, Trace, and Brandon always follows him with whatever he does. Chase usually goes along with him and then Wyatt –"_

"_You're just trying to find excuses –"_

"_I'm scared, Tracey! It would tear the whole group apart – I can't be responsible for that…"_

Tracey smiled, but it was grim and forced. "I stand by what I've said but you know I would never force you to tell anyone," he said reassuringly. He paused for a moment, taking the chance to look over Gary, who looked rather pale and tired. There was a sort of tension that told Tracey something had happened that had been upsetting in some way. He didn't doubt that it was related to the reason why Gary had been ready to snap when May had mentioned the other boys' girlfriends. "What happened?"

"Wyatt got drunk and had sex with Darren's sister last night," Gary said with a strange, bitter smirk.

Surprised as he was by how easily Gary answered the question, it took a moment for the response to sink in. "Wyatt?" Tracey asked in disbelief. Gary nodded. "The crazy little blonde boy that doesn't know how to keep his mouth shut or when to stop drinking?" Another nod. "How drunk was she?"

Gary laughed at that and his smirk became a touch less bitter. "Drunk enough that she puked on him afterwards… Not that it kept him from bragging about it all day. Thank god it was a short day; I might have killed him otherwise."

"I take it this led to some sort of fight between him and Darren," Tracey spoke up after a moment, a statement rather than a question. Wyatt's antics always seemed to lead to quarrels, which always led to an irritable Gary. Of course, this just had to happen during the week of exams at school, when Gary was already visibly stressed from his extra classes. Gary sighed and Tracey noticed for the first time today how tired the other boy looked.

"Darren beat the absolute shit out him; I've never seen him so angry. It was such a complete fucking fiasco: even Adrian got involved, and he _never_ gets involved in these sort of things." Tracey raised his eyebrows in surprise. He was so used to Adrian being quiet and kind and couldn't possibly imagine him getting involved in a fight amongst friends, other than the occasional bickering. Gary began speaking once more right when Tracey was about to ask how Adrian had gotten involved. "All he said was that it was out of line for Wyatt to screw around with Darren's sister and then come in and start bragging to everyone about it. Brandon tried defending Wyatt by saying that he was just drunk and couldn't help it but, when Adrian said that he knew what he was doing, Mike jumped in and started calling him a faggot."

An ugly sneer formed on Gary's face at the word and even Tracey felt an angry grimace appear on his own. "I hate hearing that word," he admitted quietly. It was one of those few things that could absolutely make Tracey's blood boil.

"So do I. At least you can defend yourself when someone says it around you."

Tracey frowned. "Don't give me that, Gary. You're more than capable of defending yourself, you just choose to sit there and take it." Once it was out of his mouth, he regretted it. The comment sounded harsher than he meant and he certainly hadn't meant to vocalize that particular thought in the first place.

Gary pursed his lips slightly, as though about to retort but, to his credit, ignored the comment and spoke as if Tracey hadn't said it. "He has such a screwed up sense of reality; he honestly thinks Adrian is gay because he's so quiet. Mike wouldn't know an actual gay guy if he gave him a blow job."

"You know, whenever I tell you that you should just come out and tell them, I don't expect you to be that straight forward. Really, a simple 'I'm gay' is sufficient, no oral sex required." Tracey sighed and leaned back in his seat when Gary remained silent. "Note to self: Gary cannot take a joke," he commented lightly, folding his arms behind his head and shooting a grin at his friend.

When Gary still didn't reply, he dropped his arms and began to fiddle with a pen that was laying on the table between the two boys. Something in the conversation had set Gary off; Tracey could tell that the other boy now had his defenses up. He knew better than to pry so he didn't say anything, instead choosing to do what he had come into the kitchen to do in the first place – find something to eat before starting on the afternoon chores out on the ranch. Gary said nothing as Tracey puttered around the kitchen but Tracey could feel his eyes on him. It didn't bother him, knowing that Gary was watching him, rather, he felt flattered that someone found him interesting enough to watch his every move.

While it didn't bother Tracey, it did bother Gary. It seemed as though he couldn't get enough of watching the other boy; Tracey-watching had simply become a habit whenever they were alone and Gary couldn't help it. Everything the older teen did seemed to drive him crazy in some way. The way his fingers tapped lightly on the edge of the refrigerator door while he searched for something was an image that had seemingly become etched into his mind. Tracey had long fingers that always seemed to move with a sort of grace and lately it seemed as though they haunted Gary's fantasies, something that made him grateful that he didn't talk in his sleep, lest he somehow gave something away while spending the night at a friend's house.

Just imagining one of his friends finding out that he was gay because he had been talking in his sleep sent a jolt of fear through Gary and it was enough to force his eyes away from Tracey's hands. Unfortunately, every other place that his eyes sought out caused uncomfortable thoughts. He couldn't help focusing on the way Tracey's shorts rested so neatly on his hips and he couldn't help the mental image of those shorts being unzipped and then gently tugged down by his own hands. Tracey turned away from the refrigerator and headed towards the pantry on the opposite side of the room with a small half-smile gracing his lips. Gary could just imagine how that wonderful smile would look with Tracey gazing down at him as he slid those shorts down Tracey's legs…

A sudden jolt of desire rushed through Gary and he forced down a groan – he positively ached with the desire to make the small fantasy come true. Shifting his weight uncomfortably, Gary tried to force the thoughts out of his head but the fantasy was already too far along… Tracey was fiddling with the radio on the counter, trying to find the classic rock station that he was so fond of, and again those fingers caught Gary's attention. He could imagine those fingers sliding through his hair with those smiling lips pressed against his own. He could picture those hands guiding his own, slowly pushing down those dark blue boxers that he caught the slightest glimpse of when Tracey reached for something on the top shelf of the pantry, and then his mouth lowering towards Tracey's naked flesh as those _damn_ fingers slid through his hair again –

"Oh, my _god_!" Gary groaned loudly, rubbing his temples and shaking his head a bit to get the images out of mind. Tracey turned and peered at him quizzically and Gary stopped what he was doing. "Headache," he lied quickly.

Tracey gave him a sympathetic smile, pulled a bottle out of one of the cabinets, and placed a couple of aspirin tablets on the table in front of him. "If you had your calculus final today, then that's pretty understandable," he said as he turned back to the cabinets, but Gary barely heard him. His hands had already worked their way back into the fantasies and Gary couldn't help but wonder how those fingers would feel entangled in his hair or running over other places...

A small sigh escaped Gary as he considered the pills in front of him… How much aspirin would it take to get rid of these fantasies? Exactly how much aspirin would it take to kill a person, for that matter? _We are _not_ going there!_ he scolded himself for the thought as he picked up the pills and swallowed them dry before quickly leaving the room, a cold shower being his main concern at this moment.

… … …

The early afternoon had faded into evening without notice once Tracey went back to working in the lab and on the ranch. Gary had disappeared for the afternoon, presumably to hide out in his bedroom, and Tracey hadn't bothered looking for him. Regardless of how much he would have enjoyed spending the afternoon with the younger boy – he had work to do. Now done with work, fed, and freshly showered, Tracey headed towards his bedroom, changed his mind and walked instead to the open door at the end of the hall. He could hear the television in Gary's bedroom and, beneath that, the sound of Umbreon and Venonat playing.

The bedroom seemed crowded when Tracey entered: Gary's Arcanine was curled up between the bed and the television with Gary laying back against him, playing a video game, while Umbreon and Venonat bounced on and around the bed, the canine barking and yipping excitedly. Gary barely glanced up, even when Tracey sat down next to him.

"Please don't tell me that you've been sitting up here playing video games all day," he said quietly.

Gary shook his head, eyes still on the screen. "I just woke up a few minutes ago," he admitted.

Tracey let his eyes rake over Gary for a moment, taking in the adorably mused hair and the sleepy eyes. He couldn't help but smile at how cute he looked. "Don't tell me you stayed up all night studying."

"I didn't. I stayed up most of the night because everyone was fighting and I had to make sure no one got killed… Like I just did," Gary sighed and tossed down the game controller. "I hate this game," he said flatly. "I can never remember how to get past this part…"

"This is the first time I've heard of you acting as peace-keeper between your friends."

Gary snorted and rolled his eyes. "That's because we normally don't need one; I mean, we'll argue and beat up on each other, but there's a limit. It's just that Wyatt doesn't normally do anything this stupid, none of us do." He picked up the controller, un-paused the game and returned his attention to it.

"Well, it's understandable for Darren to mad at him – you would be, too, if it was May he had slept with," Tracey pointed out reasonably. Gary nodded and Tracey continued after a moment. "It's kind of interesting though… He wasn't mad at you at all when you kissed –" Gary tore his eyes from the television and glared at Tracey, silently daring him to finish the sentence. With a small shrug, Tracey fell silent for a moment. He met Gary's eyes calmly for a moment but looked away after a moment, his gaze landing on the television. "Um, Gary, you're about to… Never mind," he finished lamely when Gary cursed as the character died again. He glanced at Gary for a moment before looking back at the screen; the game seemed familiar for some reason… "Is this the second Resident Evil game?" he asked suddenly.

Gary frowned, still glaring at the spot on the television where the character had just been killed while he had been too busy glaring at Tracey to notice. "How did _you_, of all people, recognize this game?" he asked incredulously, finally turning to look at Tracey once again.

Another small shrug. "My little brother used to love video games when we were younger. Whenever there was bad weather, I would stay inside and play too. This was his favorite game; I've played it and seen it played so many times… Actually, I know how get past this part," Tracey added as an afterthought, nodding to the screen. "I could do it for you," he teased.

"No, I'm doing it myself this time, for once."

"For once?" Tracey echoed. "You need your friends to beat video games for you, Gary?" He grinned, unable to keep from picking on his friend. It was incredibly rare that he found an opportunity to tease Gary but he took every opportunity he could. Gary reacted differently to teasing from Tracey than to teasing from his other friends; with Tracey it was narrowed eyes and a small, irritated smirk that barely hid a smile. A laugh usually followed, which was something that Tracey loved to hear.

Sure enough, that adorable expression appeared on Gary's face. "No, Chase did it the first time I played and now no one ever lets me do it myself."

"Because you can't do it, right?" Tracey pressed, still grinning and trying desperately not to laugh.

The smirk on Gary's face cracked and he smiled, about to reply when Arcanine gave a low growl as May's Meowth wandered into the room. Gary groaned and stood, leaving Tracey with the controller, which he picked up in the other boy's absence. Tracey un-paused the game, tried his best to remember how to play this particular game, and set to work as Gary scooped up the cat and took him out of the room. He could hear Gary calling to May – something about keeping the cat out of his room – while she yelled a less-than-polite response. Tracey rolled his eyes at the bickering focused on the game, quickly remembering the details; by the time Gary had returned to the room, sometime later, he had already passed the difficult part and was making good progress.

Tracey glanced up when Gary slammed the bedroom door and sat down next to him with a sigh, too busy examining a large scratch on his arm to pay attention to Tracey, who was still playing the video game. "Little bastard scratched the hell out of me," he observed, sounding only mildly annoyed.

"You should know by now that he only likes your sister," Tracey pointed out, pausing the game. The only response his comment elicited was a roll of the eyes while Gary continued to examine the fresh scratches on his arm with bored interest. "You know," Tracey began after a few short moments had passed. Gary glanced up to show that he was listening. "They make you look less gay. All fierce, manly, and straight with your battle wounds from rescuing a wayward kitty for a damsel in distress."

This time Gary laughed, though he still said nothing in response. He took his attention away from the mild injuries and leaned back against Arcanine, lazily running his fingers through the canine's thick fur. After a moment, he realized that Tracey was holding the controller. A glance at the television screen showed that the game was now past the part that had been giving him trouble and he shot the older boy a small glare that was only half-serious. Grinning, Tracey offered him the controller, only to pull it just out of reach when Gary reached for it. Gary narrowed his eyes and held his hand out, silently demanding that Tracey give it back. Tracey started to hand him the controller before pulling it out of reach once more.

"Tracey…" Gary warned softly, sitting up and reaching for the controller again.

"You owe me for beating that super hard part," Tracey informed him solemnly, trying to keep from laughing. He was careful to keep the remote out of Gary's reach, even when he pushed him playfully.

Another playful shove and the two boys suddenly found themselves wrestling on the floor with Tracey laughing as Gary tried to pry the controller out of his hands. Arcanine watched on lazily, not bothering to move, no matter how many times someone accidently kicked him or rolled on one of his massive paws. After a few seconds of watching silently, Umbreon jumped down from the bed and joined in by licking Tracey's face until he was laughing too hard to keep his grip. Gary finally snatched the controller from Tracey and returned to the game with a triumphant grin while Umbreon barked happily, apparently thrilled that she had been able to help out.

Still laughing softly, Tracey sat up and straightened his clothes. "You still owe me," he teased.

"And what do I owe you? A night of endless passion?" Gary replied with a small smirk, obviously joking.

Tracey hesitated, wondering whether or not he should respond with the first reply that had come to mind. If Gary was joking around like this then maybe it wouldn't go over too terribly…

"A kiss," Tracey finally said.

He saw a glimmer of uncertainty in Gary's eyes, even as the boy stayed focused on the video game. Another smirk quickly replaced it. "But I thought you said that you didn't have a vomit fetish," Gary pointed out, remembering another joking conversation from months before – the day after he had kissed Darren's sister.

"Maybe I've changed my mind," Tracey said with a laugh, remembering the same conversation. By now, he knew that the reason Gary had gotten sick immediately after his first kiss had to do with a combination of drinking too much alcohol and imagining that the girl was any one of his friends. He was sure that, should he and Gary ever kiss, vomit would not come into play. At least, he hoped not.

"Sure," Gary replied sarcastically. "I think you're dying for that night of passion but just don't want to admit it." He paused the game and carefully set down the controller, leaning closer to Tracey so that they were nearly face-to-face. "Is that the case?" he teased.

Tracey wondered for a moment if this was the same teen he had comforted so many times regarding sexuality, the same boy that was so uncomfortable with liking other boys that he tried desperately to like girls – even kissing his sister's best friend in his efforts; the same person that was so terrified of his family and friends' responses to his sexuality that he was willing to push them away to avoid them finding out. Being this close to Gary, he could still see a faint glimmer of uncertainty in his eyes but it was nearly concealed by a challenging arrogance.

"Maybe I just want to kiss you," Tracey said after a moment. He somehow managed to keep his voice light, with that joking quality that had been there for the past few moments.

Something softened in Gary's gaze, the cockiness and challenge seemed to drain away, and Tracey could suddenly see every insecurity present in his eyes. Yet, beneath this, beneath the searching gaze that Gary fixed him with, there was something – a spark, perhaps. Somehow, Tracey knew that he had said the right thing. He leaned forward and began to close the distance between them…

Suddenly, the door opened and the two boys jumped apart as Wyatt burst into the room. Gary bumped the game console, causing the game to freeze but neither seemed to notice in light of their discomfort over what had just nearly happened. Tracey lowered his gaze to the carpeted floor, embarrassed by the fact that he had taken advantage of the situation and had nearly kissed the other boy.

"Will you _please_ tell Darren to stop being so crazy?" he asked loudly, seeming rather distressed.

"I already told you, I'm not getting involved." Gary replied, not looking away from Tracey. "You screwed up and he's pissed at you because of it. I have nothing to do with it."

Wyatt groaned, a sound that bordered on obnoxious and ended in a near-growl. "You kissed Amanda and he didn't freak out!"

Gary finally looked up at his friend, eyes narrowed. "I don't know if you realized it or not, but there is a difference between kissing her and having sex with her! The only reason I even kissed her was because you just _had_ to get involved."

It was an uncomfortable situation for Tracey, sitting so close to Gary when his anger towards his friend was so apparent. After only two comments from the blonde boy, the waves of rage coming off Gary were nearly palpable; it was obvious to Tracey that this situation amongst his friends had bothered Gary greatly. Tracey raised his gaze from the floor to chance meeting Gary's eyes in the hope that it would calm him down a bit.

He was mildly surprised to notice the subtle changes that occurred along with the anger. Of course, Tracey had noticed the narrowed eyes and the slight shrillness that crept into Gary's voice, but there were other things that he hadn't noticed before. The color of his eyes had lightened just enough for Tracey to see the flecks of gold and green that he had never noticed before. It was an attractive change; he had always loved the other boy's dark eyes but they were far prettier than usual now. The slight flush that just barely darkened his cheeks was cute, Tracey decided quickly. With the way Gary's hair was still mused from his earlier shower, Tracey could easily imagine how he would look immediately following a make out session.

A small smile formed on Tracey's face after the last thought but he forced it down, figuring that this was not the best time to appear particularly happy. Gary may not have noticed it by now – he was too busy arguing with his friend – but Tracey would not put it past Wyatt to notice that smile while Tracey was checking out Gary, not even bothering to hide what he was doing.

Gary stood unexpectedly and walked to his desk, straightening the school notebooks that were scattered across it. His hands were shaking, but not from anger towards his friend. It was what had just happened with Tracey that got to him. Not just the closeness, the way they came so closing to kissing. It was everything – the way it felt to simply be in the same room as him, the comfort he felt when they talked, even if he was just venting a bit about some stupid thing that had happened between his friends. Worst of all, in his eyes, at least: the way it felt to have the other boy beneath him as they laughed, as his hands touched Tracey's, trying to pry that stupid controller out from between his fingers… Those damn fingers, again…

He suddenly felt helpless, utterly alone, ashamed of what had happened just before Wyatt's surprising entrance. He hung his head and released a slow sigh, trying to calm down before he ended up lashing out at Wyatt, or worse, Tracey.

"Wyatt, please leave," Gary said softly, once he was sure that he wouldn't snap at the blonde boy.

"Are you fucking serious?" Wyatt asked loudly.

"Wyatt…"

"You're taking his side! I don't believe it, Gary, what the hell?"

"I already told you, I'm not getting involved – get the hell out of here!" Despite being a bit embarrassed by the outburst, Gary couldn't stop at that. Every bit of frustration that he had been feeling towards his friends in the past months threatened to spill out of him at the provocation. "I'm so sick of everyone's drama, and I'm sick of you being such an idiot! Maybe if you would use your brain for once, then you wouldn't get into these situations!"

Surprised by the outburst, Tracey stood slowly, ready to step in if needed.

Wyatt started to retort but Gary cut him off. "If you would stop getting totally wasted every night, maybe you wouldn't be failing every class, maybe your parents wouldn't be about to kick you out, and maybe Darren and Adrian wouldn't be so pissed at you!"

"Gary…" Tracey said softly, hoping to diffuse the situation before it could worsen.

Wyatt, who had paled dramatically at Gary's words, interrupted him. "And you think you're so much better than the rest of us? Because you get to skip class so that you can play around in the lab, because your grandfather spoils the fuck out of you, because your family is actually normal? Is that why you're such an ass to us now?"

By now Tracey could see that Gary was visibly shaking with suppressed anger and he worried for a moment that if Wyatt pushed him any further, Gary might end up admitting why he had been so moody since moving back home. As much as he wanted Gary to come out and tell his friends what was going on, he didn't want it to happen like this. There was no way it would end well if it came out in a burst of anger, in the middle of a fight.

"Forget it," Wyatt suddenly deflated, seeming to give up on the argument. "I'm done… All I wanted was to ask you to help me fix a mistake that I made, but obviously whatever's going on with you is more important than your friends." With that, he turned and left the room. A moment later, the front door slammed and Tracey and Gary were alone again.

"Gary," Tracey started.

"Go," Gary cut him off, his voice dangerously low.

Despite wanting to stay and calm him down, Tracey simply nodded, gestured for Venonat to join him and left the room. After a glare from their trainer, Umbreon and Arcanine left the room as well. Tracey watched from the doorway of his own room as Gary closed the bedroom door harshly; Arcanine started to head down the hallway but stopped when Umbreon whined and scratched at the now-closed door. The fire dog turned, slunk back down the hall, and nudged the other canine with his snout until she turned away from the door and began to walk away. She stopped in front of Tracey and looked up at him with large scarlet eyes, her ears drooped sadly.

Tracey sighed softly and reached down to rub her ears. He knew that Umbreon was well aware of the affect he had on the pokemon's trainer – he could calm Gary down when he was irritated, he could cheer him up when he was down, he had even discovered the best ways to break up the arguments between the two Oak siblings. Somehow, though, he knew that going and talking to Gary now would do more harm than good, for both him and Gary. He was certain that their near-kiss had something to do with the outburst in the other room and he didn't want to press his luck with the other boy.

"Sorry, girl, he's got to do this on his own today," he said, gently stroking Umbreon's sleek fur while Arcanine watched from a bit further down the hall. Umbreon stared up at him reproachfully until Arcanine barked at her, urging her to follow him down the stairs at the end of the hall. "He has to do this on his own," Tracey repeated firmly. It was apparent to him now that he couldn't stay involved in this situation – it seemed that he was only making things worse and he felt terrible for it.

... ... ...


	10. Chapter 9

**Secrets Kept **

Late in updating again… What can I say? Being a first year teacher means a ton of work and very little writing time.

Thanks to Defiant Vixen!

This chapter starts off right after the end of last chapter. Part if this chapter kind of refers back to one of the early chapters, I think it was chapter two that talked a bit about the painted ceiling in Gary's room – it dealt with childhood memories of friends, particularly a certain rival.

Chapter Nine

He was miserable. Of course, that had been the norm ever since September or October – but this time, it was far worse. Something about the way Umbreon had pawed at the door and cried after she had followed Arcanine and Tracey out of the room had torn at him and Gary was forced to admit that he had been in the wrong for insulting one of his best friends and then for kicking Tracey out of his room. Even so, he couldn't help the anger that had flooded him when Wyatt had over-reacted to him simply asking for him to leave the room.

Gary sighed and slumped in his desk chair, absently straightening the many objects scattered across the surface of the desk. What had happened with Tracey before Wyatt had entered his bedroom was still circulating in his head: Tracey's closeness, the teasing jokes between them… Had they all been jokes?

"_Maybe I just want to kiss you."_

Was it possible that that particular statement had not been a joke? Gary couldn't say that he was at all turned off by the thought of Tracey kissing him – he actually wanted it to happen, but was terrified of what would happen if they did. At this point, Tracey was perhaps the only person he could just _talk to_ about anything and everything. A groan escaped him: he couldn't deal with this right now. He was simply too tired and felt too weak and sick to dwell on the events. A poor night's sleep was the least of his worries; the tension from that morning's exams, plus the looming ones set for the next morning, would not leave him. It didn't help that all of his friends, including himself, had several drinks the night before and he hadn't had anything to eat since then…

Lately it seemed as though the group of teenagers could not hang out together without alcohol being involved and there were many times when Gary would suddenly feel weak and ill and then realize that he hadn't eaten in nearly an entire day or, in a few instances, even longer. Constant anger, confusion, and general melancholy always seemed to simply kill his appetite.

A frustrated sigh escaped Gary and he stood, only to flop onto the bed a second later. He laid with his eyes closed for several moments, trying to calm down, but to no avail. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't escape the image of Tracey coming closer, nor the fantasy of actually kissing the boy… or more. Hoping to escape the images, he opened his eyes and gazed at the ceiling miserably, focusing on the painted stars scattered across the darkness above him. Again, distractions were not particularly easy to come by: there were too many memories of painting the stars as a child. He forced himself to focus on the stars themselves, silently naming the constellations that had been painstakingly sketched and painted.

It was no use – the constellations had been Adrian's idea and Darren and Wyatt had been the two friends to help Gary put them in place. Gazing up at them only served as a painful reminder of all of the drama that was currently taking place between his friends. Currently, he was torn between his two closest friends and couldn't defend one without betraying the other. His best bet was to not get involved, but that was much easier said than done. Lately, Wyatt had been drinking constantly, even downing an entire bottle of rum on his own one recent weekend, though Gary kept telling himself that he hadn't really drank that much. It just seemed like his friend had drank a large bottle of potent alcohol because he, Gary, had been too drunk to accurately see how much his friend had to drink. Of course, he knew that wasn't true – he had watched from a distance, vaguely listening to Chase and Brandon's worried conversation about their blonde friend, all the while trying to keep from feeling too incredibly miserable.

He knew he couldn't choose sides when it came to this situation between Darren and Wyatt; he was able to see both sides and therein lay the problem. To say that Wyatt was depressed due to family troubles would be an understatement and Gary could certainly see how that could affect his behavior. The blonde boy was so insecure that he was forever throwing himself at the girls, always looking to score – just as Gary would constantly flirt back with his sister's friends whenever they started with their shallow advances. The girls were just a distraction, for Gary, the distraction was from how terrible he felt being attracted to other males. For Wyatt, it could be any number of things, but the purpose was still the same. It was all a distraction and it was all an act: a mask to hide behind. Because of that empathy, there was no way Gary could possibly side against the other boy.

They had both done something that was expressively forbidden by doing something romantic with Darren's sister. Alcohol had been a major contributing factor in both instances but the results had been vastly different. This instance resulted in fights and a torn group of friends, the time Gary had kissed the girl hadn't resulted in anything dramatic, save for a private break down behind closed doors. Just as there was no excuse for Wyatt to sleep with her, there was no excuse for Gary to kiss her – a friend's sister was off limits.

Suddenly, Gary had the inexplicable urge to go and explain the reason behind his actions so many months ago to Darren. He hadn't been thinking; he was just desperate to like a girl – _any_ girl, even if it was a girl that may as well be his own sister. He had gotten too caught up in an act, so anxious to keep his friends from ever wondering about his sexuality. He had been stupid and drunk and, God, how he wished he could take it back!

Gary gave the painted stars on the ceiling one final, baneful glare and forced himself off of the bed, out of the room, and down the stairs to the garage. Along one wall was a shelving unit with a few semi-full cans of paint. One of them still held a decent amount of black paint, left over from painting something in the lab. He picked it up and snatched up a paintbrush, barely noticing the dark green paint that stained the handle: it was the same one that Tracey had used the first time sexuality had ever come up in conversation between them.

He shook his head forcefully – he was _not_ going to think about Tracey. Not now, not ever again. He was simply done with this.

He was done with seeing his friend in any sexual light, regardless of how kind, understanding, and undeniably attractive he was… And he was done focusing on his other friends, the worries he had about them discovering his secret. He was done, and he was determined to erase the symbolic connection to the past, to their friendship, by painting over the stars on the ceiling.

… … …

It had all made sense then, when he had been angry, dejected, and unbearably stupid. An hour of work left behind a ceiling with blotchy spots of freshly gleaming black paint, now covering a project that had taken months. The paint fumes had left Gary feeling nauseated and the realization of how incredibly _stupid_ painting in anger had been had left him in tears for the second time in perhaps six months.

The black paint was gone, and so were the painted stars, and Gary was left to dry his eyes, gather the remainder of his pride, and find something to calm him down. Something that wasn't stupid, pointless, or dangerous. At least not too dangerous. A little danger would give him some adrenaline and would, hopefully, cheer him up a bit. That was what had led him to bungee cording his surfboard to the top of his car and heading out to the beach, despite the storm that was approaching the mainland.

The skies were dark and cloudy, and the water was certain to be choppy, but it would be a distraction and it would give him a rush that would, if everything went well, make him feel better.

He hadn't counted on running into Wyatt, though he should have anticipated it, seeing as Wyatt was the most fervent surfer out of the group. They ignored each other for the better part of an hour, focusing more on staying on their boards despite the rough waves than acknowledging each other's presence. Finally, once the water had turned too rough to continue surfing, they left the beach and headed towards the parking lot, still saying nothing to each other. Wyatt carelessly tossed his board into the back of his pickup truck and watched as Gary attached his board to the top of his car.

"My parents are getting divorced," he announced quietly. Gary finished securing his board and turned slowly to face his friend, unsure if he had heard correctly over the roaring of the waves. "They won't stop fighting…"

"I'm sorry," Gary replied, not quite knowing what else to say.

"Dare' knows what's going on, Amanda found out from him somehow… It wasn't my idea to… You know, last night."

"Wyatt… That really doesn't make much of a difference, you still –"

"I was drunk! I wasn't thinking –"

"Still doesn't make a difference. You slept with her, bragged about it, and then fought about it."

"You kissed her!"

"I know I kissed her, Wyatt. It's not an easy memory to forget," Gary pointed out calmly. After spending time in the water, he had little trouble staying calm, despite his friend's irritation. The cold water had been invigorating, the distraction refreshing. It felt almost as though he could think more clearly now.

"But no one did _anything_ when you did that," Wyatt replied, sounding almost desperate.

Gary sighed and met his eyes, a strange urge to tell him everything suddenly welling up in him. "Wyatt…" He stopped, unable to continue. "Never mind. I'll talk to Darren tomorrow, just stay out of trouble until then, okay?"

The other boy only gave a slight nod before climbing in his car and driving off, leaving Gary to lean against his own car with a sigh. Gary stood there for a long while, mind whirling as he gazed unseeingly towards the hills of Pallet Town.

Why had he come so close to telling him? Why hadn't he just told him, for that matter? _Because he has such a big mouth, he would tell everyone in Pallet… Just like May would,_ Gary reminded himself. How long would it be before he got up the courage to come this close to opening up to a friend again? Would he _ever_ be able to tell them? _Probably not, so don't even waste your time thinking about it._

He glanced over the terrain of the town and easily located the lab and the ranch. There was human figure on one of the hills, surrounded by pokemon; somehow, he knew it was Tracey. Another sigh escaped Gary. There was no way to escape the pokemon watcher. Not when they lived in the same small town and certainly not when he was in the bedroom next to him in the same house. Even here, at the beach, he couldn't escape him. The only place in Pallet that was further from the lab than the beach was the tiny harbor a mile southeast, which was home to a ferry that went from Kanto to the Orange Islands. Again, another reminder of Tracey…

Thunder rumbled in the distance and the first drops of rain began to fall, causing Gary to groan in annoyance – the roof wasn't on his Jeep and his grandfather would be undoubtedly angry if the interior of the car got soaked in the rain. Could the day get any worse?

Finally pulled out of his stupor, Gary climbed into the car and was about to pull out of the parking spot when he noticed that his cell phone was on the floor when it had been on the dashboard when he arrived at the beach. A glance at the screen revealed several missed calls, five from May, two from his grandfather, three from Darren, and even two from Adrian - apparently the vibration from the ringer had caused the phone to fall.

Maybe the day could get worse.

… … …

May had been quick to inform him that he had missed dinner and that their grandfather was looking for him when Gary returned home, though he ignored her and headed straight upstairs. The plan had simply been to head to his room, change into dry clothes, and then spend the rest of the night hiding out in there. He felt miserable enough to do exactly that, yet, for some reason, Tracey's open bedroom door seemed a bit more inviting. Tracey was sitting at his desk, drawing, while listening to a classic rock station on the radio, softly singing along to the Boston song that was playing.

It only took a moment for Tracey to glance up from his sketchbook once Gary leaned against the doorway to the room. He took one look at the board shorts and t-shirt Gary was wearing, both soaked from the rain, and shook his head. "I guess I was right when I thought you went to the beach. Your car didn't get too wet did it?"

"No, but I got soaked putting the roof back on. How did you know I was at the beach?"

Tracey gave a small shrug. "I didn't see your board in the garage when I went to do my laundry earlier. It seemed logical that you would be at the beach since both the board and your car were gone," he said as though that explained everything. He turned back to his sketch and continued shading as he continued speaking. "The professor was looking for you, he seemed annoyed about your bedroom. Why did you paint the ceiling anyway?" A groan and a roll of the eyes were the only responses he received to that question.

There was silence for a few moments before Gary spoke up again. "I almost told him."

Tracey paused for a moment. "Your grandfather?"

"No, Wyatt."

Another moment passed silently before Tracey looked back at Gary. "Seriously?" Gary nodded. "Why?"

"I don't know…" he moaned miserably.

"Well, do you want him to know?"

"Not particularly."

Tracey wasn't entirely sure that he believed him. If Gary was so dead set against his friends finding out, he wouldn't have come close to telling any of them and he wouldn't be so bothered by it. "Then why does it bother you?" Gary merely shrugged. "I can't really help you then, Gary," Tracey pointed out, averting his eyes.

It was the wrong thing to say. Gary snorted and shook his head. "If I wanted help, I would have asked for it," he replied derisively, turning and stalking towards his bedroom.

Disappointed by the response, Tracey sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. The reaction did nothing but remind him that there really wasn't anything he could do for the other boy as long as he was drowning in self-pity. "Of course you would have," he muttered under his breath. "That's why you came in here."

_Let him deal with it_, he thought to himself. He wondered if perhaps he should apologize for what had happened earlier, in Gary's bedroom. _Don't even think about it, it was a joke. If Gary can't take the joke, then that's his problem._ Tracey stood with another sigh, choosing to ignore his thoughts and head towards the other boy's room anyway.

Deep down, he knew that their near-kiss was not a joke. What led to it was a joke, the actual event was far from it.

This was starting to get to be too much for him. Helping out a friend in need, he could handle; falling for that friend was a bit too much. He was starting to feel like he needed a break from Pallet and all of the stresses of the town, so he did the only thing he could think of and reached for the telephone to call his mother.

… … …

Tracey was the type of person that absolutely needed at least a solid six hours of sleep in order to function properly, unfortunately, that meant his decision to stay up half of the night on the phone with his mother made it nearly impossible to complete his work at the lab the next day. He was almost jealous of Gary for once – the other boy could function easily on only an hour or two of sleep. Of course, Gary was at school this morning, finishing his exams for the year; English and biology, if he remembered correctly. Without anyone else to fix his botched chores, the professor had been quick to notice that something was amiss when it was nearly eleven in the morning and the water pokemon had yet to be fed breakfast. He had reminded Tracey about the chore, figuring that the boy had grown used to Gary completing it in the mornings – after all, Gary had been doing it most of the school year and this _was _an odd week.

The professor hadn't been surprised at all when Tracey immediately rushed to feed the water pokemon when reminded, but he had been surprised by the uncharacteristic curse that Tracey gave before doing so. Once he finished the chore, Tracey returned to the lab and leaned against the wall next to the door for a moment, trying to decide whether he should take a short nap before lunch.

"Tracey, are you feeling alright today?" Professor Oak asked, glancing over at his assistant.

Tracey sighed and sank into his desk chair. "I don't know," he admitted. "I didn't sleep well last night."

The professor nodded and glanced back at the computer screen he had been looking at. "That seems to be the case with every one today," he observed.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I couldn't sleep so I came down here – "

"Which explains why all of the paperwork is done and your desk is clean… for once," Tracey added with a small smile. The professor's late-night working sprees usually resulted in a much cleaner lab than usual the next day.

The professor returned Tracey's smile before continuing. "Based on Gary's attitude this morning, I assume he didn't sleep well either. Then again, with the way he's been lately, this might just be Gary being Gary…"

Tracey groaned and shook his head. There was always something going on with Gary and he was tired of hearing it. When he gave his mother a vague description of what was going on, she had suggested coming home for a few weeks and he was starting to feel a strong desire to do just that.

"It seems like something's bothering you," Professor Oak spoke up again, pulling Tracey away from his thoughts.

"I talked to my mom last night."

"Oh? How's your family?"

"Fine… I was thinking of visiting them for a bit this summer."

"You should. You haven't seen them since you visited in October."

He hesitated for a moment; this visit would be significantly longer than most of his recent visits and he knew that would make things difficult at the lab over the summer. "I was thinking of staying there for a couple of weeks…" he admitted.

"Hmmm. That will make things a bit difficult, especially with Gary going away, but I suppose I can always have Darren and Adrian help out."

"Gary's going away?" Tracey asked.

The professor nodded. "Possibly. Professor Birch is tagging Sharpedos in the Orange Islands with Professor Ivy and asked me if Gary wanted to join them this time. After all, he has been helping from a distance with the actual research part of it. Personally, I hope he decides to go. Maybe it'll cheer him up a bit."

_Great, so we'll both be in the Islands at the same time_, Tracey thought, a bit sarcastically. "Do you think he'll go?" he asked.

Professor Oak thought for a moment before replying with a small shrug that immediately reminded Tracey of Gary. "Hard to tell. I would think he would be eager to go since he hates staying in one place but he's become rather lazy lately… If he isn't fighting with his friends or skipping school, he's sleeping… Which he usually does when something's bothering him," the professor added as an afterthought.

Tracey said nothing in response. It was certainly true that something was bothering Gary – hell, there were many things bothering Gary and Tracey could list them all off the top of his head and with no effort. Of course, he couldn't exactly tell Professor Oak that. He was sworn to absolute secrecy and, no matter how much he wanted to, he couldn't tell anyone about the issues. It was difficult to keep that sort of secret, and there were days that Tracey simply wanted to sit down with the professor or May, or even pull aside one of Gary's friends, and bring something – anything – to their attention in hopes that they would take it upon themselves to get to the bottom of Gary's issues. Being the only person, other than Gary, with this weight on his shoulders was a terrible pain.

"You two have become rather close this year," Professor Oak observed suddenly. Tracey froze, knowing what was coming. "Do you happen to know what his issue is lately?"

Tracey sighed and shook his head. May was always asking him the same thing, as was Darren, and occasionally Gary's other friends. "He talks to me about some things…" he hedged.

The professor simply nodded and returned to his work. "At least he's talking to someone. He's so stubborn, I wouldn't be at all surprised if he refused to talk to anyone."

_To Hell with it…_ "I'm the only one he'll talk to," Tracey blurted. _Please, figure it out,_ he thought. "I guess he thinks I'm the only one that can relate… or something like that…" he muttered. _Put two and two together and talk to him…_

"It's amazing how teenagers can convince themselves of that… No one can ever understand them. It gets to the point where you just want to give up on them and figure that they'll come around on their own." Professor Oak smiled and left, heading in the direction of his office, leaving Tracey alone in the main lab.

As soon as the professor was out of the room, a loud groan escaped Tracey and he dropped his head on the top of his desk, hitting his forehead rather hard on the surface. "Great…"

"You know, that's about how I've felt all day," a voice spoke up from behind him, eliciting yet another sigh. He didn't feel like dealing with Gary just now.

"Isn't that how you've been feeling just about every day since, oh, I don't know, September?" Tracey snapped irritably.

Gary shrugged calmly, just barely rolling his eyes as he ventured deeper into the lab to lean against one of the counters close to Tracey. "Not every day."

"Just most days."

Gary shook his head and suppressed a sigh. "Sure, whatever you say, Trace."

"You know it's true," Tracey replied. With that, he stood and left the room, unable to stand being in the same room as Gary at the moment. He was simply sick and tired of the angst and drama. He just wanted to go home and forget about it all for a few weeks.

Gary groaned in frustration, raking a hand through his hair before crossing his arms over his chest. "God, I need to get out of this town," he complained loudly to no one in particular.

"Well then, here's your chance," his grandfather's voice came from the direction of his office, causing Gary to roll his eyes.

_Now what?_ he wondered in annoyance.

… … …


	11. Chapter 10

**Secrets Kept**

Well, this chapter is a bit different from the others, since Tracey and Gary are away from each other and out of Pallet for most of it, so I hope that this is a nice change of pace. It's also a longer chapter than usual, which I hope makes up for the delayed update. Sorry if it seems like the chapter skips around a bit!

Thanks very much to my reviewers, especially Defiant Vixen who never fails to so kindly review. : ) No worries about being late, Vixen, I've been too busy to write much at all for the past few months, so I totally understand!

Chapter 10

The day had finally come. Tracey was finally getting to go back home for an extended period of time – nearly a month this time. He wasn't entirely sure how he had managed to survive the two weeks that had passed between initially bringing up the idea of a vacation with Professor Oak and the actual day to leave, but he was happy that he had managed.

The past two weeks had been difficult. Gary's attitude had improved only slightly with the notion of leaving Pallet for a while; Tracey had hoped that this would give him some sort of a break from the general angst surrounding the boy but this had clearly been in vain. Though Gary had clearly made a conscious effort to avoid Tracey, he couldn't help but notice that Gary had withdrawn from his friends almost entirely and only seemed to hang out with them when absolutely forced to. This had been the cause of a great deal of alarm for May and it seemed as though her concern had worn off on the professor; Tracey, of course, couldn't help but worry about his friend and his strange behavior. Unfortunately, any voiced concern seemed to irritate Gary immensely, to the point where he had vehemently declared in one outburst with both his grandfather and May that he was absolutely fine and didn't need to be "bothered by everyone, every second of every day about something that is a non-issue."

Tracey had fought not to laugh at that particularly dramatic outburst – it was impossible for anyone, other than Gary himself, to annoy him at every second of every day. He had even pointed that out, quite reasonably and calmly, only to receive an absolute death glare from the other teenager. That hadn't been the only memorable outburst. Another particularly memorable one had been when the professor traveled to the Indigo Plateau for a conference for a few days, something May took advantage of by throwing a party that had involved much alcohol. At some point during the party, one of Gary's friends had made a comment about him drinking so much in recent times; Darren had responded by muttering, obviously louder than he had intended, "you're turning into Wyatt," which only served to spark Gary's ire. Tracey doubted that Gary had even spoken to his best friend since then.

It was no good to dwell on Gary's issues though. Tracey was going home for several weeks and that was all the mattered, or so he kept telling himself. No matter what, there was always something to remind him that his friend was going through some sort of personal hell and that there was nothing he could do, short of flat out telling either Professor Oak or May that Gary was gay and was so pissy because he was afraid of what everyone's reactions would be to it. Of course, this was out of the question.

Tracey sighed softly has he gathered a few last minute items from his desk and placed them in his bag. He had to leave soon in order to catch the ferry from the mainland to Hamlin Island, after that it was an even longer ferry ride to the southern portion of the archipelago until he reached Sunburst Island. Unfortunately, he would be with Gary until this point since Gary was traveling further south to Valencia Island. He didn't even want to take the car ride to the small harbor south of Pallet with Gary.

The sound of happy squeaking caught his attention and he turned to see Marill bounce up on the desk chair, seeming cheerful. The little pokemon seemed to deflate slightly when he noticed that Tracey wasn't in a particularly good mood. Marill jumped up on the desk and placed his paws on Tracey's arm, staring up at him with wide eyes as if to ask what was bothering him.

"It's nothing, Marill," Tracey replied with a forced smile as he scratched Marill behind the ears. "I just don't want to be stuck on a boat with Gary all day." Marill's ears drooped slightly and he dropped his paws, seeming dejected at the mention of the other teen. "Yeah, I know, Buddy, you don't like him… You would love him if he wasn't so damn miserable all the time…"

Marill glared up at Tracey at the last comment, making sure that Tracey knew how much he disliked the young researcher and the attitude he constantly had. Tracey frowned slightly at the reaction but said nothing. He knew how much Marill hated Gary and it confused him because it was so incredibly uncharacteristic for his sweet and loving pokemon to dislike anyone, particularly one of Tracey's friends.

Just down the hall, a door closed loudly, causing both Tracey and Marill to jump at the sudden noise. Tracey shook his head with a small smile as he heard Umbreon bound out of Gary's room, down the hall, and down the stairs. As much as the canine loved being home at the ranch in Pallet, it was obvious that she was excited to be leaving for what would undoubtedly be a bit of adventure – if her trainer could calm down at all. Gary walked past the open door a moment later with his bag slung over one shoulder and Tracey called out to him.

"Looking forward to wrangling Sharpedos for the next three weeks?" he asked when Gary paused in the doorway.

"I'm just glad to be getting the hell out of here," Gary replied.

Tracey nodded. "Same here," he admitted.

Gary frowned at his response, suddenly appearing suspicious. "You're leaving too?" Tracey gave another nod. "So, you're going to the Orange Islands as well?" Tracey nodded for a third time, only to be met with a frustrated groan as Gary threw his head back. "What, is he sending you to _baby-sit_ me?" With that, he turned and started to leave.

"It couldn't possibly be because I'm _from_ Sunburst Island, could it?" Tracey called after him with a touch of sarcasm. He cursed softly once Gary was out of ear range and shook his head. "Maybe he'll grow up while he's away," he groaned as he slung his bag over his shoulder and scooped up Marill. He felt more than ready to leave town.

… … …

The car ride to the harbor had passed in near-silence, the only sounds coming from Marill and Venonat as they excitedly chattered while watching the scenery pass by the windows. The little Pokemon had always loved car rides but their happiness did not seem to wear off on the other passengers in the car as the Professor drove the two boys and May, who had insisted on coming along.

They finally pulled into a parking spot at the harbor and Gary quickly opened his door, about to climb out when the professor stopped him.

"May, why don't you help Tracey unload the trunk and pick up the ferry tickets," Professor Oak suggested, raising his voice slightly to be heard over Gary's annoyed sigh. Tracey and May exchanged glances and simultaneously climbed out.

"Someone's getting a lecture," May announced in a sing-song voice as she opened up the trunk and watched as Tracey pulled out the bags.

"That's not particularly surprising," Tracey pointed out. It was true – the professor was always finding some reason to pull Gary aside for a talking-to about something.

"I wonder if we can listen in," May wondered aloud, leaning into the trunk to listen through the backseat of the car.

Tracey recalled Marill and Venonat into their pokeballs and picked up his bag. "We have to get tickets, May, and I'd rather not annoy your brother. He already thinks I'm going just to baby-sit him."

"Self-centered little brat, isn't he?" May called back cheerfully as she backed out of the trunk. Tracey couldn't help but smile as she straightened her clothes and grinned. It was nice to know that at least one of the siblings he lived with was consistently in a good mood.

Inside the car, Gary rolled his eyes. "Now what?" he asked irritably.

The professor sighed. "That attitude is exactly what I wanted to talk about," he replied wearily. "Being asked to be part of this type of research project is a big deal –"

"Sayda was bigger."

"Gary, enough – you were able to get involved at Sayda because I pulled strings. You were able to get onto this because you were smart and you worked hard. This one is entirely you: the only thing I had to do with it was introducing you to Professor Birch years ago, and talking the school into letting you do lab work in place of science classes."

Gary groaned softly and resisted the urge to roll his eyes again. He was quickly growing sick of his grandfather's lectures; they seemed to happen on a nearly daily basis – sometimes more often. "Is there a point to this?" he asked flatly, gazing out the window. He could see Tracey and May walking towards a ticket window on the side of the building near the dock. He pointedly avoided focusing on Tracey and instead turned his attention to the several boats in the small harbor.

"Yes," the professor replied exasperatedly. Just as his grandson was growing tired of these lectures, he was growing tired of the boy's attitude. The older man sighed again and took a moment to gather his thoughts before pressing on. "You're smart, Gary, probably smarter than even you realize and certainly smarter than you've been acting these past few months." Gary turned from the window to glare at him but the professor seemed entirely unfazed by the look. "You're intelligent, you're hard-working, and you're determined. _But_ you're also stubborn and, frankly, you've had a terrible attitude. Everyone is capable of being in a bad mood, but I know you, and this bratty teenager routine is not you."

Returning his gaze the water, Gary shook his head slightly. "What's your point?" he asked, maintaining the same flat tone from earlier.

"My point is that this is a big opportunity, one that you deserve. Tagging Sharpedo… You'll be out on the ocean every day, working with dangerous pokemon: it's what you love. I'd hate to see you screw this up by not being yourself."

Gary was silent for a moment, simply gazing out of the window before turning back to look at his grandfather. "You think I deserve this?" Again, his tone changed little, though Gary was genuinely curious about this. Despite how self-focused he had been, Gary knew that there were times when he had truly pushed the limits of his grandfather's nearly limitless patience. If the older man thought that he still deserved a chance to spend a few weeks doing something that he undoubtedly would love, then perhaps he would be supportive of… other things.

The professor nodded slowly. "Despite how crazy you have driven me this year, yes." There was a sort of finality in his tone that caught Gary somewhat off-guard – his grandfather could be rather stern on select occasions but he was rarely this firm. Gary couldn't help but wonder if that firmness had been intentional, perhaps to emphasize the fact that he had played the role of an angsty and irritable teen rather well this past year.

Professor Oak climbed out of the car and walked around to the trunk to pull out the last of the bags while Gary lingered in the car for another moment or two thinking about the conversation that had just taken place. This had been different from the normal lectures he had grown used to; they usually seemed to be intent on making him feel stupid and childish, but not this time. This time it seemed almost as though the professor was trying to encourage him in a subtle way. The fact that he had acknowledged how much Gary's behavior had bothered him over the past few months was what had particularly stood out. The lectures were common, yes, but they were always exclusively based on Gary's behavior, occasionally touching on how it affected May or his friends, never on how it affected his grandfather. Something about the mere mention of it hit home and a small part of Gary realized that he would be able to talk to his grandfather without fearing a negative response.

With a sigh, Gary climbed out of the car and rested his forearms on the low roof. He watched for a moment as his grandfather fussed with something in the trunk. After a moment, he took a deep breath, intending on either apologizing for being an idiotic teenager or divulging why he had been acting like that, whichever came out easiest.

"Hey, Grandpa?" As Professor Oak looked up from the trunk, appearing mildly surprised by the tentative start, the words seemed to disappear and Gary lost his nerve as quickly as it had come. He rested his head on his arms for a second before moving away from the car with a shake of the head. "Never mind… It-it's not important."

For a brief moment, the professor looked concerned but shrugged it off as he closed the trunk and followed Gary towards the ticket window that May and Tracey were waiting at.

… … …

The fresh air felt wonderful as the ferry moved quickly through the ocean. They had already been on the boat for two hours, but Tracey didn't feel the slightest bit bored yet. Despite the fact that he still faced another hour on this boat, followed by nearly four on a second boat headed towards Sunburst Island, he still felt excited and happy. His sketch book had already collected four more sketches in the time on the boat and he was sure that more would come soon enough, but for now, he was content to just watch the water as the ferry plowed along through the waves.

There were few people on the boat other than himself and Gary, most of them trainers, one of whom was a rather attractive young man about his age with green eyes and brown hair a similar shade to Gary's. For some reason, he looked vaguely familiar to Tracey and he had to wonder if this boy was also from Sunburst. He had felt the boy's eyes on him as he had walked past once with Marill and had noticed that the boy had a tell-tale slight feminity to his mannerisms. Whoever he was, he had to be gay and, on top of that, he had seemed somewhat interested in Tracey.

Maybe, just maybe, if this boy was going to Sunburst Island, he might be able to help Tracey get his mind away from Gary.

Almost the exact second his thoughts drifted to Gary, he heard a familiar voice behind him. Tracey turned, greeted Gary and Umbreon quietly, and turned back to the ocean.

"What are you doing?" Gary asked, leaned against the railing next to him.

"What does it look like?" Tracey retorted.

Gary took a deep breath and shook his head slightly. Tracey's short attitude with him, though still uncharacteristic was becoming more common place. "Alright, it was a stupid question," he admitted. He paused for a moment and glanced at Tracey before continuing. "What's with you lately?" he asked lightly.

Tracey turned to him with an incredulous look. "What's with _me_? _With me_? Not you, the one that's turned into the hellion of Pallet, but me?" He shook his head, wondering if Gary had finally lost his mind entirely.

"I'm not Wyatt," Gary replied softly, seeming embarrassed at being called the 'hellion of Pallet.'

"According to a few of your friends, you're turning into him."

"That's not exactly something I'm proud of…"

"Then maybe you should do something to fix that, Gary."

"Like what?"

"Well, for starters, you could stop being a jerk to your friends," Tracey pointed out as calmly as he could. He turned and leaned back against the railing with his arms crossed. For once, Gary didn't reply. "You could stop drinking so much with your friends, you could stop panicking about what will happen if someone finds out that you're gay, you could stop dwelling on everything that's bothering you."

"It's not that easy," Gary sighed.

"No," Tracey agreed. "But it's a lot harder when you don't try." He frowned and thought for a moment. "I guess that's what's been with me lately." Gary glanced at him curiously and Tracey shrugged his shoulders in response. "You're the one that asked… It just bothers me to see a friend who's actually a great guy turn into such an ass because of an insecurity."

He found it surprising that Gary had no reply; the other boy was often so stubborn that he couldn't resist getting in final, argumentative word. Rather than replying, Gary dejectedly gazed out at the water. Umbreon leaned against him with a soft whine and nudged his hand with her nose until he finally scratched her behind the ears. Trying to come up with a different subject, Tracey followed his gaze, hoping that there would be something else out there. Seeing Umbreon's behavior was almost always the most tragic thing about… everything.

Pokemon always picked up on the emotions of humans. While Marill seemed to be rubbed entirely the wrong way by Gary's attitude, Umbreon was severely upset by it. She was protective of her trainer and her whines and cries were always an indicator of whenever Gary's mood turned. Tracey had pointed this out – subtly – to the professor, as had May, and nothing had come of it. It wasn't that the professor didn't care, Tracey knew this for a fact, even if Gary seemed to feel otherwise. It seemed as though the professor was almost in denial that something was wrong.

A blue and red flash beneath the surface of the water caught Tracey's eye and he was about to point out the Tentacruel to Gary when he heard another voice behind them.

"Hi, you're Tracey, right?"

Turning around, Tracey found the cute teenager that had looked so familiar to him earlier. This close, Tracey could see that the boy wore a necklace with a glass charm of a pokeball hanging just below his collar bone, allowing him to recognize the boy from home on Sunburst Island. A close friend from years earlier that he had long since fallen out of contact with. Just behind him stood a Vaporeon who was peering curiously at Tracey.

"Alex," Tracey acknowledged the boy with a smile. "I haven't seen you since you left to become a trainer."

The trainer laughed. "So, you remember me, then."

Tracey smiled in response. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Gary roll his eyes and shake his head with a small smirk as he continued to look at the water. Next to him, Umbreon held her head higher and seemed to stand with a more regal posture. Tracey almost laughed at the haughty change in the dark type pokemon. Why Umbreon bothered, he didn't know – it was obvious from first glance that Umbreon was the superior pokemon. He dismissed this fact; he already knew that Gary had been a particularly advanced trainer and he refused to compare an old friend to his newer crush. After a few moments of casual small-talk, Alex invited Tracey to accompany him to the snack machines for a small lunch, an invitation that Tracey happily accepted.

Before leaving him, Tracey quickly squeezed Gary's shoulder and leaned closer to him. "Don't dwell on your problems, just try to relax and have fun," he advised quietly.

Gary's smirk deepened and he gave a small, almost bitter laugh. "Sure thing, Trace. _Have fun_," he sneered.

Tracey rolled his eyes and shook his head, almost wishing he could smack the younger boy in the back of the head. "Jerk," he muttered under his breath as he followed Alex and his Vaporeon away from the railing. He could tell easily that Gary was jealous and while he found it to be a bit amusing, he certainly was not going to dwell on it.

Once Tracey was out of earshot, Gary turned away from the water and looked down at Umbreon. "A Vaporeon… Are you serious?" he asked of no one in particular. Umbreon flicked her tail proudly in response, slicking her long ears back slightly, which caused her trainer to smile a bit.

Loving the water as much as he did, Gary's original intention had been to evolve his Eevee into a Vaporeon once she had passed level 50 and learned Last Resort. Of course, his pokemon was as stubborn as him and had resisted the evolution, going as far as Headbutting the Water Stone out his hand so hard that it flew across the lab back home and shattered when it struck a counter. Regardless of how annoyed he had been with her for this, Gary had been ecstatic when she actually evolved into the Umbreon she now was. The evolution far better suited her personality and he was sure that she was stronger as an Umbreon than she would have been as a Vaporeon.

Looking at the other Eevee evolution while it's owner openly flirted with Tracey had revealed weaknesses that he knew Umbreon – and most of his other pokemon – lacked. The Vaporeon had been evolved early – too early in his opinion – the small stature of the pokemon revealed that much; Gary doubted the Eevee had even learned Bite before being exposed to a Water Stone. The Vaporeon's eyes were not as bright as Umbreon's, it's coloring was paler than usual for a Vaporeon, and it's skin had a slightly dry appearance. All symptoms of slight vitamin deficiencies in pokemon – not bad enough to be a sign of a poor trainer, but just enough to be a sign of a trainer that didn't do his homework before buying food for his pokemon.

"I guess Tracey's not choosing boyfriends based training abilities," Gary mused with a touch of bitterness. Umbreon looked up at him and perked her ears slightly, her eyes alight with a slight gleam of mischief. Gary saw the gleam and shook his head. "I don't want to date him, don't get any ideas," he warned his pokemon. She replied with a small growl, her ears drooping a bit. "I'm serious, 'Bre. I don't want to date him." Umbreon seemed to ignore the reply as she haughtily licked at one of her front paws; Gary knew her well enough to see that it was a sign of defiance. She didn't believe him in the slightest. "I don't even like him that way!" This time Umbreon gave a sharp bark, followed by a cheerful whining that Gary recognized as her canine version of laughter. Gary sighed. "Bitch…"

… … …

It seemed as though the day was dragging on and on with no end in sight. The ferry was quickly approaching Valencia Island – Gary could actually see the island in the distance – but that did little to relieve the boredom that he was feeling after being stuck on the boat all day. Tracey was still off flirting with his friend; Gary had seen them several times and hadn't been able to suppress the sudden surge of jealousy he felt every time he saw them. It was childish and stupid but he couldn't help it.

The other boy that had stolen Tracey's attention didn't seem particularly _bad_ or anything like that; he was just annoying. With a sigh, Gary set down the book that he was reading and closed his eyes briefly. It was becoming harder and harder by the day to deny the feelings he was having towards Tracey. It seemed like a mere crush had turned into a near-obsession and it was driving him crazy for a number of reasons. Of course, the main reason was the inability to act on those feelings. Another reason was this little brat flirting with Tracey. Gary's stomach churned uncomfortably every time he saw the two of them together and it was starting to truly bother him, even more than it had been in the past few months at home.

"Hi, grouchy," a familiar voice spoke up unexpectedly.

Gary couldn't help but smile slightly. "Hey, Trace," he replied without opening his eyes.

He heard Tracey sit down on the bench next to him. "Tired?"

"Not really." Gary opened his eyes and glanced over at Tracey, who seemed a bit quieter than usual. "What are you doing over here? I thought you were busy with your friend."

Tracey nodded distractedly. "I was. I just figured I'd say goodbye before we reach Valencia. Call me stupid, but I think I'll actually miss your attitude and sarcasm while we're apart for three weeks."

Gary snorted softly. "It does sound stupid when you put it like that," he agreed.

They were quiet for a moment before Tracey spoke up again, this time seeming a bit uncomfortable. "I know you don't like him," he said softly.

"His Vaporeon was evolved too soon and has vitamin deficiencies, he's clearly not –"

"As good a trainer as you were and still are."

Gary glanced over at Tracey, surprised that he had finished the sentence like that. Those hadn't exactly been the words he had in mind but they were sufficient and certainly kinder than his own. "Yeah, well, when your grandfather is a pokemon professor, you tend to pick up on techniques that other people don't."

"That can't be the only reason you don't like the guy, Gary," Tracey said quietly, ignoring Gary's last statement. He shook his head when Gary didn't respond. "I know that's not the only reason," he pushed but still received no reply. "If there's a reason why, then you can tell me. Any reason, Gary… You know I'll listen." He did actually know the reason why Gary didn't like Alex, whom he had spent the majority of the boat trip with. It was jealousy. He could see and sense it easily. He had noticed Gary's dark gaze every time he had passed by him throughout the trip.

Gary looked at Tracey and met his eyes searchingly. He didn't quite know what to make of Tracey's words – it seemed like he was insinuating something and Gary wasn't quite sure he wanted to know what that something was.

"He thinks you're straight, by the way. I don't think you have to worry about people figuring at that you're gay, especially if you can fool another gay guy." Gary rolled his eyes as Tracey pressed on. "Alex is going back to Sunburst Island, just like me. It'll be nice to spend time together, we haven't seen each other since we were about ten or eleven… The way things are going right now, I think he might actually ask me out while we're home," Tracey mused calmly.

Something in Gary snapped at the offhand comment. "He's not your type," he hissed, forcing down the burst of jealousy that rose in him at Tracey's comment.

Tracey titled his head to the side as he looked at Gary, seeming mildly amused. "So then, what is my type?"

Gary shrugged his shoulders. "Not him."

"That's not very specific."

Gary shook his head irritably with a sharp sigh. "Someone that knows more about pokemon. You're too knowledgeable to date someone who clearly can't feed his pokemon the proper type of food."

"A better trainer then, or maybe more the researcher type? Interesting. Anything else?"

"Tracey, you live in Pallet!" Gary groaned. "You work there and you have friends there, why would you bother dating a traveling trainer?"

Tracey frowned slightly at the question. He knew Gary's point and it had already crossed his mind. He already knew that if he ended up with this other trainer it wouldn't be particularly serious. After all, Tracey's mind was already on someone else. He would certainly rather date Gary, there was no question in his mind about that – there was already chemistry, already similar interests and goals. And, of course, they lived together and were both gay. It would make sense on several levels for them to date. It was just a matter of what Gary wanted and what he was willing to do.

"Gary," he sighed softly, meeting the other boy's eyes. "What's the real reason you don't want me with this guy? Seriously, tell me. If it's a good reason… I won't do it. If you think there's someone else who's better suited for me, then tell me, because right now, I'm going home for almost a month and I have nothing to stop me from actually having a boyfriend and experiencing that for once. But," he sighed again. "If one of my best friends has a reason for me to not date someone, then I want to hear it."

Gary looked up again. "Best friend?" he echoed.

"Yes," Tracey confirmed but didn't elaborate. He knew Gary was not going to answer the question and he didn't feel like prying just to get the other boy to admit that he was jealous. "We'll be at Valencia soon. Have fun, try not to get bit by any Sharpedos."

Gary groaned while Tracey walked away, presumably back to wherever his friend was. As he returned his dark gaze to the cool blue water surrounding the boat, he couldn't help but wonder why Tracey would consider him a best friend. They were certainly roommates and good friends but Gary knew that he often pushed Tracey's patience to his limits, but then again, didn't he also do that to Wyatt and Darren, who also did it to Gary in return? It was all too common for close friends to annoy each other, to share secrets… To hate the person that the friend was dating. That, in particular was one of the current issues with Darren: his new girlfriend was Brandon's ex, who happened to be the biggest bitch on the planet. Gary couldn't stand her, nor could the majority of the boys in Pallet; they only put up with her because she seemed to make Darren happy… most of the time.

Why was he even thinking about all of this in the first place? It was pathetic and the only reason behind it that Gary could think of was the fact that he wanted to be the one that Tracey dated, rather than some other guy that he didn't even know. Thinking of Darren's girlfriend back home forced him to admit that whether or not he liked this guy didn't make much of a difference if Tracey ended up happy with him, for this trip at least. Once Tracey was back in Pallet… That was a different story entirely.

He rolled his eyes at himself as he turned away from the water, his eyes quickly seeking out Tracey as the other boy was just about to enter the indoor portion of the boat.

"Trace," he called flatly. Tracey paused before turning, appearing mildly impatient with him. At this point, Gary wasn't sure that he could blame him for being impatient – he knew he was being a pain. "Date who you want."

Tracey looked at him suspiciously, wondering what had brought this about. "What's with the sudden change of heart?" he called back to Gary in the same flat tone that the younger boy had used.

"As long as the person makes you happy, does it really matter what someone else thinks?" Gary shrugged and leaned back against the railing, figuring Tracey would be pleased with this change in viewpoint.

To his surprise, Tracey frowned. "Yes," Tracey replied tartly. "It does matter." With that he turned and left, leaving Gary alone to heave another sigh as the boat finally pulled up to the dock at Valencia Island.

… … …

Next chapter… Gary's adventures with sharks and Tracey's adventures with his little boy toy ;)

Who knows what insanity shall ensue?


	12. Chapter 11

**Secrets Kept**

So much for a timely update… I'm starting to suck at this. Let's just say that life has been rough these past couple of months and writing has been extremely difficult as a result.

There are a few things I want to quickly bring up before moving on to the chapter. The first is the appearance of non-pokemon animals in here. I know I mention them in a few of my other fics (including _Secrets Told_) so obviously I would figure that they would be around in the pokemon world. The main reason I do it (other than being a biology nerd who is quite familiar with sharks and other marine critters) is because I see absolutely no way for various ecosystems to work together with only a few hundred creatures that are so unique. It's the biologist in me. So anyways, that's that. Another thing is Tracey's family… With his quiet and patient personality, I could picture him with plenty of siblings, so that's one reason why he has a few. Also, I will be changing the rating of this story to M at some point in the "near" future for, well, the boy-on-boy action that so many of us desire to read about. :)

And without further ado, here are the next two chapters. They're quite long and I think some parts are a bit wandering but hopefully it's okay (and elicits some reviews *looks hopeful*).

Chapter 11

The water was beautiful - clear and crisp, a brilliant blue and Gary could see straight to the bottom of the sea. Gazing gloomily over the edge of the boat, he watched a large barracuda swim along a rock formation many feet below. Perking up a bit, he leaned further over the side of the boat to watch the fish's elongated body move slowly through the water. The species had always fascinated him for some reason, despite being common and far less intriguing than pokemon species. Though Gary loved pokemon, he often found himself nearly mesmerized by simple animals with no special powers.

Many trainers and, even more disappointing, researchers, found simple animals dull and not worth a second glance but his grandfather had raised him and May with the belief that all creatures were important. _"If they are so unimportant, why do we need bacteria to help break down our food? So small and simple, yet we depend on them,"_ the old man had said many times during Gary's seventeen years.

Gary jumped, startled when a pair of large hands suddenly grasped his shoulders. "Don't fall," a mildly amused voice spoke up from behind him.

Professor Birch leaned against the side of the boat next to Gary with a laugh, shaking his head amusedly while Gary caught his breath. "I hate you," Gary muttered when his heart rate slowed back to normal.

The professor laughed harder. "That was a good reaction. I haven't been able to scare you like that since you were seven," he commented, eliciting an eye roll from the teen. Now one of the most well-known pokemon researchers, Professor Birch had spent several years working with Professor Oak after earning his first degree from graduate school while Gary was a child. Fortunately for Gary, his relationship with the still-relatively-young professor was providing him with opportunities that were certainly hard to come by. He had been asked to come along on this Sharpedo-tagging trip before many marine biology grad school students from the universities scattered about Kanto, Hoenn, and the Orange Islands.

"So, you invited me here just so you can scare me. I feel so valuable." Gary shook his head and returned his gaze to the water. It seemed like all he had done today was gaze at the water, lost in his own thoughts, whenever he wasn't throwing chunks of dead fish in the water to attract sharks and, hopefully, Sharpedoes. He had been in the Orange Islands for only a few days now and, thus far, had not been in on much of the Sharpedo-tagging action.

"Actually, you have the most important job here."

"Which would be?"

"My assistant." The professor laughed again when Gary groaned and slumped against the edge of the boat. "What, you don't like your job?"

Gary shook his head and closed his eyes for a moment. "I live with a professor. I know that the word 'assistant' really means 'slave that does absolutely everything.'"

"Exactly. And the best assistants eventually end up leading their own research teams. I wouldn't trust most of my grad students in your place, Gary."

Though flattered, there was still a sarcastic comment on the tip of his tongue, but Gary forgot it as he caught the glimpse of a shadow in the water out of the corner of his eye. "Shark," he said automatically, his brain quickly recognizing the streamlined shape of the fish below.

The professor leaned over the side to see the creature below. "First of the day," he confirmed. "Species?"

Gary frowned as he examined the shark from a distance. He could identify any pokemon species due to his familiarity with them, but this was much different and far more difficult. "It looks like a type of requiem shark," he guessed after a moment. It was a family of sharks, rather than a specific species but Birch would just have to deal with his vagueness for the moment.

Professor Birch smiled and nodded his head. "It looks like a lemon shark, but it's at least fifteen feet below us, so it's a bit difficult to tell." He glanced over at Gary and grinned. "One thing you'll find working in the field is that the animals you work with do not always like to show up. Days like today are pretty common, where we've been out for eight hours with a long line of chum behind the boat –"

"Without a single Sharpedo in sight," Gary finished for him.

"Yes. So, what we do is find something to amuse ourselves that we can somehow relate to our research… In this case, we're going to check out the ecosystem that the sharpedoes live in – specifically the non-pokemon apex predators."

"The regular sharks."

"You catch on fast," the professor observed, walking a few feet away to a large container that held diving equipment. "You're SCUBA certified, right?"

Gary nodded, frowning slightly with mild confusion. "Yeah, it was a birthday present from Grandpa years ago. Even May is certified," he added as an afterthought.

"Good." Professor Birch set a pile of diving equipment next to Gary before peering over the edge of the boat at the shark in the water. "He's getting away," he mused, moving towards a bucket of chum nearby. He dumped some of the chum into the water and instructed Gary to get ready to go in the water.

Gary looked from the shark to the professor and then to the spreading stain of fish guts in the water. "Now?"

"While the shark's still here, yes." He noticed that Gary looked wary, still glancing from his mentor to the fish in the water. Two more sharks had appeared, seemingly out of nowhere. "You were bored in Pallet, weren't you?"

"Bored, yes, but not suicidal," Gary replied as he tugged on the diving vest that the professor had set aside for him. He ignored the fact that death had crept into his thoughts an eerie and somewhat disconcerting amount of times.

Pulling on his own equipment, the professor gave a small laugh. "One could argue otherwise with all that drinking."

Gary froze in the middle of adjusting the vest. "How do you know about that?" he asked slowly, his suspicions immediately jumping to his sister. May was far too talkative for her own good; she had most likely said something.

"You think your grandfather can't recognize a hangover? He grew up in the sixties, Gary, he's not _that_ innocent."

Slowly turning over a pair of flippers in his hands, Gary frowned. "He noticed?" The professor nodded, continuing to gear up. "He never notices those things…"

"He's a researcher, Gary, believe me, he notices details. He might not be able to keep track of the days of the week, but he definitely notices. Do you intend on starting a research project on those fins or are you going in the water?"

With a small sigh, Gary finally finished gearing up to go into the water. The fact that his grandfather had caught on to his activities with his friends left him somewhat unnerved. What else had the old man noticed about him? Hopefully not the way his eyes would follow Tracey all the time... Impossible. His grandfather was too distracted by research to notice these things. He had most likely commented on the fact that Gary often ended up with short illnesses after spending the night at a friend's house. Professor Birch had likely developed his own conclusion from that.

A few moments later and the professor and Gary were both in the water, cautiously swimming below the sharks, not too far from the research boat. Though the water was delightfully cool and refreshing, Gary couldn't help but be tense. Normally any sort of water would relax him and the sight of sharks wouldn't be too alarming – he saw them often enough at the beach near Pallet to be relatively unconcerned by their presence. Today, however, the water did nothing to help him and he felt terribly out of his element in the water. It may have had something to do with Professor Birch throwing more chum in the water right before getting in, or it could have been the usual crap going on in Gary's teenage mind. The cause, he figured, didn't necessarily matter.

The professor noticed Gary's nervousness and gestured towards the surface after being under the water for only a short while. Unsure of the reasoning behind their surfacing, Gary followed Professor Birch up to the surface. They still had plenty of air in their tanks and the sharks were still present, so he didn't see much reasoning behind going to the surface.

They reached the surface and Professor Birch took out his regulator mouthpiece while leaving his mask on. The water was gentle and had only a slight current. On days like this back in Pallet, it wasn't unusual for Gary and his friends to simply float on their surf boards, talking for hours, though Gary hadn't enjoyed those days since perhaps September and hadn't even participated in them for the past several months. In the second that it took to remember those days, Gary felt a twinge of remorse and realized that he missed hanging out with the guys back home.

Gary pushed aside the thoughts of his friends and mimicked Birch, "What's up?" he asked, not bothering to hide his confusion – or his wariness about being in the water in the first place as he glanced down at the creatures swimming below them.

"I could ask you the same thing," Birch retorted casually. He paused, glancing down for a moment to observe the body language of the three sharks in the water. Once he had determined the animals to be calm and uninterested in the two researchers, he looked back up and continued. "I've known you for a long time, Gary, I may not know everything about you but I know you well enough to tell when something is wrong. It's not like you to be nervous, especially not around the water. Something's bothering you and I'm willing to bet it has something to do with Pallet."

Gary said nothing in return and had to force himself not to roll his eyes. So many people back home had harassed him about his behavior and the last thing he wanted was one more person on his case.

The professor either didn't notice Gary's annoyance or chose to ignore it – Gary was willing to bet on the latter – and continued talking. "I'm not your grandfather so I'm not going to bug you about it. All I'm going to do is point out that we are not in Pallet, so whatever is bothering you can stay in Pallet. Take some time to enjoy being away from the lab, diving, and getting to mess with dangerous animals without Sam being on your case about it. Consider it a vacation in the form of a research trip and get your ass back down there without being worried about being eaten!" Birch then replaced his mouthpiece before diving back under the water and swimming straight towards the bottom, leaving a trail of bubbles behind him.

Gary sighed, surprised by the sudden lecture – if he could even call it that. After a moment, he too readjusted his diving equipment and followed the professor down as well. He forced himself to relax, deciding to focus his attention on the rock formation at the sea floor which he swam idly along, looking for any sort of critter that might be hiding there, until he could actually relax. He found a few Krabby and Goldeen, even a Tentacool, which he left alone, not wanting to risk a sting this early into the trip.

It took a few minutes, but Gary could finally push away the last few weary thoughts clinging to him from Pallet and the issues the town held for him. Finally free of the thoughts, if only for a short while, he dared to venture closer to the sharks that were still circling the area. The visibility in the water was clear enough to be able to admire the way they effortlessly moved through the water from a few meters away. When Gary was within a few meters of them, Professor Birch appeared at his side, gesturing to a shape in the distance.

From a distance, it was difficult to see exactly what the large creature was but, after a moment, the outline of four fins surrounding a torpedo-shaped body become visible. There was no mistaking the body shape of the Sharpedo approaching.

… … …

"You have a bite," a blonde teenager observed, glancing at her brother's fishing line. She sighed, noticing that he was engrossed in a sketch of a Lapras. "Trace!"

Tracey glanced up from the sketch to look at his younger sister. "Hmm?" An audible click came from the fishing pole that was set in a holder within the rock formation next to the siblings as whatever was attached to the hook swam in the water. "Oh!" Tracey tossed down his sketchbook, picked up the pole, and began reeling in the line while his sister, Marie set down the book she was reading to watch.

Marie giggled softly at Tracey; it was an amusing sight to see her eldest brother reeling in what was undoubtedly another Magikarp or small bait fish with a small, plastic rod that had Staryu and Starmie stickers all over it. It was quite old, a childhood rod of either Tracey's or her other brother's, and the family usually left it and a small tackle box of lures at the small cove they were currently relaxing at. The hook, with a tiny fish attached, reached the surface of the water and Marie laughed harder. Tracey frowned, scooping up the fish to examine it.

"Hooked through the gills," he observed. "Probably won't survive," he added a bit sadly.

"Use him as bait," Marie suggested. "Maybe we'll actually catch something that isn't so worthless then." She tossed her sun-and-lemon juice-bleached hair over her shoulder and picked up her book again.

Tracey frowned at the fourteen-year-old. "None of the fish are worthless," he chastised mildly. "They're all important to the ecosystem." He had heard Professor Oak say it so many times that it was now a natural response to offhanded comments like Marie's.

"Yeah, yeah, we're all connected in the great Circle of Life," Marie said with a slight roll of her eyes. "I know, Tracey."

"Sorry, little guy," Tracey murmured, hooking the fish through the eyes with a deeper frown. "Then you shouldn't say things like that. And has Mom seen your hair? She's going to freak when she sees you've colored it purple," he added with a glance at the ends of his sister's hair, which she had colored with permanent markers earlier that afternoon.

Ignoring Tracey's comment, Marie snatched his sketchbook and began flipping through it in retaliation, moving out of his reach when he tried grabbing it from her. She paused on a picture and smirked; knowing what she had found, Tracey felt his stomach knot.

"This doesn't look very much like your boyfriend," she trilled, referring to the boy, Alex, whom Tracey had hung out with on the ferry over to Sunburst Island. The boys had spent quite a bit of time together – they had been friends as children – and Alex had asked Tracey out after being back home for only a day and a half. Tracey reached for the sketchbook but Marie pulled it out of reach again. "Or is this your _Pallet boyfriend_? Does he know about Alex? He's hotter than Alex… Look at that stomach –"

"Marie!" Tracey made another snatch for the sketchbook, blushing furiously. It was a sketch of Gary that he had made at the beach one day a few weeks prior. He had taken Marill while tagging along with May and had barely been able to keep his eyes off of Gary as he had placed Umbreon on his surfboard and let the waves push the canine around. It was one of the few times Tracey had actually seen the sullen teenager laughing and smiling recently.

"How's he so ripped? And is that his Umbreon?"

"He's a surfer, hence the surf board, now give that back!"

Sensing her brother's annoyance, Marie grinned and passed the book back to him. "Think I have a chance with him?" she teased.

Tracey sputtered for a moment before being able to force jumbled thoughts into a coherent sentence. "No – he's three years older than you and he's ga-" he paused. "You didn't hear that," he said quickly, turning his attention to the fishing rod, which he fidgeted with nervously.

"He's gay too?" Marie inquired interestedly.

Tracey sighed and shook his head, frustrated with the way he had blurted it out. "No one else is supposed to know that… It's been a bit of an issue."

"You didn't have any problems with being gay."

"Yes, I did. They were short-lived and you were too young to remember, and I was lucky," Tracey pointed out softly.

The two siblings were quiet for a few moments until Marie spoke up again. "Do you like him?"

"He's my friend, Marie," Tracey replied, his tone mild but holding a slightly impatient edge to it.

"Is he the one you were talking to Mom on the phone about? The one that's in the closet and you like him and he likes you but he's too scared to do anything about it and you don't want to risk the friendship and he's paranoid about his friends – oh, is it something worthwhile this time?" she suddenly changed topics when Tracey began reeling in the line again.

"Whatever it is, it's bigger than what we've caught so far," Tracey said, purposely ignoring and avoiding the comments she had made about Gary. Undoubtedly, she had listened to his conversation with their mother through one of the other phones in the house. Though annoying and frustrating, this was something Tracey could deal with later, right now, there was a feisty creature attached to the other end of the fishing line and he wanted to reel it in and unhook it before it injured itself.

The rod bowed dangerously, looking nearly ready to fold in half before a white and orange fish emerged from the water, frantically thrashing on the line. Marie gasped excitedly. "I love Goldeen!" she squealed happily.

Tracey frowned again as he eyed the fish, which was obviously particularly angry. He knew that Goldeen tended to unleash relentless peck attacks whenever they were hooked on fishing lines: that was his experience at least. Sure enough, the hooked pokemon began attacking the pole the watcher was holding, causing him to hold the pole as far away from him as possible, trying to take a moment to think of how to deal with it. If it were Gary in his situation, he would deal with the attacks – no matter how much blood they spilled – and quickly remove the hook from the fish and carefully return it to the water. For a brief second, Tracey suddenly missed the young researcher; things were so different without his sarcastic friend around. Gary would love the island, Tracey was sure…

Shaking his head with a small sigh, Tracey gritted his teeth and used the fishing line to pull the Goldeen closer to him. Doing his best to ignore the sharp pain in his hands as the fish attacked them, he quickly removed the hook, checked for injuries, and returned the Goldeen to water. "Why couldn't that have happened while Gary was around?" he muttered to himself. Sure, he would have had to attend to Gary's injuries had the boy been around, but in all honesty, Tracey didn't mind that. Though Gary tended to insist on treating his own injuries, he would usually allow Tracey to help and Tracey had to admit to enjoying taking care of him, regardless of the worry stitches and antivenom injections caused.

Marie had pouted as her brother released the caught Goldeen but now watched him curiously after hearing the comment about Gary. "If you like him so much, then why are you dating Alex?" she asked softly.

"Drop it, Marie! Mind your own business," Tracey replied sharply, setting about the task of disassembling the fishing rod and replacing it amongst the rock formation they were sitting at. By the time he was done, there was blood dripping from his hands and staining the rocks while his little sister watched on worriedly. It wasn't often that Tracey got so annoyed by a family member and he tended to feel guilty after any sort of outburst; this time was no exception. After a moment, he glanced up at Marie with an apologetic smile. "Come on, kid, let's get home and let Mom work her magic," he suggested, walking to the edge of the water to wash the blood off of his hands.

It was nearly time for dinner when the two siblings reached their house: a modest two-story beach house that was a short walk through some woods to the hidden cove where they had been fishing. It was in a less inhabited part of the island with many pokemon and animals living in the surrounding area. Growing up, Tracey was forever playing in the woods with his younger brother or swimming in the ocean with his slightly older twin sister when he wasn't out developing his talent for watching pokemon. Their mother was a bit annoyed when her elder son appeared in the kitchen when she was in the middle of cooking dinner with cuts and scrapes all over his hands and a sheepish explanation involving a Goldeen. Nonetheless, after about five minutes of light chastising, cleaning, and bandaging, Tracey's hand was nearly as good as new and he was busy helping his mother in the kitchen.

He was quietly chopping vegetables, lost in his own thoughts, when his mother spoke up. "Do you miss Pallet?"

Tracey thought about it for a moment before he responded. "I guess so. It's not so much that I feel homesick or anything… I guess it's more that I miss certain people," Tracey admitted. He chose not to elaborate for the moment but his mother cast a prying glance his way and he couldn't help but give in. She'd always had a way of making any of her four children spill their thoughts. "Well, I've lived with May and the professor for years now so it feels weird to not see them every day - they're practically family to me now. And Gary's really my best friend in Pallet, other than Ash, but Ash is so rarely home that it hardly counts when you talk about the town specifically."

His mother gave a small, knowing smile. "I thought Gary was driving you crazy though," she said slyly.

Tracey sighed softly and paused in the process of cutting vegetables. "He does drive me crazy," he admitted. "But he's still my friend and we have a lot in common -"

"Like, you're both gay and you like each other?"

"Marie, out," Mrs. Sketchit chastised without so much as a glance at her youngest child.

Tracey set down the vegetable knife rather hard and turned to face his mother, leaning against the counter and crossing his arms across his chest. "She has a point," he said after a moment of hesitation. "I hate seeing him have so many issues with being gay... It's not the end of the world, it's not even a bad thing."

"It is to some people, Tracey. The world has a lot of closed-minded people in it."

"Yeah, but his family isn't like that and neither are most of his friends. I honestly think that he's been friends with them for so long that it wouldn't change anything between them, even if they are somewhat homophobic."

"All of them?" Tracey paused at his mother's interruption and looked at her questioningly. "I mean, are all of his friends and family absolutely likely to accept it with no problem, or is there one or two people that could have an issue with it? There's a reason behind every fear, you know."

"There's probably one person that would have an issue with it, but it's not family and it's not one of his best friends..."

"Even so, he's probably scared that he's not going to have anyone by his side -"

"He would have me," Tracey cut in irritably.

At this, Mrs. Sketchit turned from the stove to face him. "As a friend?" She asked slowly. "Or more than friends?

Tracey sighed. "I thought we had established this, Mom."

She shook her head slightly. "Let me get this straight, you want to be more than friends with him?" Tracey thought for a moment, then nodded. "Then why in the world are you dating some other guy?"

He paused and tried to think of a reason, finally he shrugged and slumped against the counter in defeat. "I don't know... I thought he was cute and we used to be friends... Maybe I just wanted experience having a boyfriend for once. All of the other gay guys in Pallet are just so feminine and shallow, I can hardly stand being around them because it's so annoy –"

At that exact moment, a young woman in a swim suit and short-sleeved rash guard walked into the kitchen. "I saw your boyfriend out surfing today, Trace," she announced, pulling a soda from the refrigerator. Tracey groaned in response to his elder sister's appearance. "It was one of the funniest thing's I've ever seen. Next time, do you think you could date an actual guy?"

"Thanks for that, Tara," Tracey snapped. "Really, that's exactly what I need – everyone being on my case about a guy I've been dating for a week! What is everyone's deal with this?" He suddenly felt a rush of sympathy towards Gary and the frustration the other boy felt whenever his family would get on his case about his attitude.

Tara set down her soda and crossed her arms, fixing her brother with an even stare. "It's not you to date someone like this. The boy wears skinny jeans and eyeliner for god's sake! You need a _real_ guy, not –"

Tracey pushed away from the counter and began heading towards the back door. "Suddenly I'm not hungry," he said, slipping into the backyard.

Irritated by his family's insistent involvement in his love life, Tracey wandered about the backyard, following an old rock path past his mother's vegetable garden, past the pool, and into the grassy area beyond that. The yard was quite large and he had calmed down somewhat by the time he reached the old swing set that was in the middle of the grassy portion of the yard. He dropped down on to a swing with a sigh and put his head in hands for a moment. He was beginning to regret ever telling his mother about everything with Gary. It had somehow spread to everyone in his family, most likely due to Marie's eavesdropping but that was beside the matter. He was fast growing tired of hearing about why he should try dating someone his family didn't even know, who was too far in the closet to even attempt a relationship, as opposed to a childhood friend who wasn't the slightest bit scared of open flirting or kissing.

The past week had been fun, except for the three times that his love life had become the topic of a family discussion. Tracey had spent time with his family, of course, but what was far more exciting for the teenager was the time spent with his new boyfriend. The private moments in the other boy's bedroom and in the concealed areas around the Sketchit family property: the kisses and touches… The speed of everything had both surprised and alarmed Tracey. It was fun and exhilarating but at the same time, his sister was right; this wasn't at all like him. Tracey was usually more shy than this, he knew it as well anyone else. The stress from dealing with Gary must have been affecting him, making him desperate for some sort of romantic interaction. The problem was, the more he thought about it, the more he wanted to be with Gary, but Alex was nothing like Gary.

One of the things that attracted Tracey to him was the fact that Gary was not the slightest bit feminine, unlike Alex, who had that certain swagger and fashion sense. Gary's athleticism, too, was an attraction to Tracey – for one thing, it was helpful at the lab and around the reserve, not to mention it made watching him fun. Were they to date, he would certainly never hear anyone say that seeing his boyfriend surfing was hilarious. If anything, he would be able to proudly say that his boyfriend was a damn good surfer and was sexy to watch.

The thought of Gary at the beach in nothing but a swimsuit was nearly enough to drive Tracey crazy. He felt his body react to the mental images the thought pulled up and he sighed as he shifted his weight to attempt to alleviate some of the pressure he felt in his groin.

"Hey, Trace!" Tracey looked up at the sound of his sister, Tara, calling his name and saw her crossing the lawn in his direction. "What are you doing sitting out here pouting?"

"I'm not pouting."

"Sure you're not. I can always tell when my baby brother is annoyed," Tara teased, tugging on a strand of Tracey's hair as she sat on the swing next to him.

"It's a ten minute age difference," Tracey replied tiredly.

"Twelve, actually, but who's counting?" she grinned and nudged him in the ribs, eliciting a tiny smile. "So, why are you so wound up about this? We just want you to be happy, if you're getting all stressed out about this then you obviously aren't happy."

"Maybe you should've been the Pokemon watcher instead," Tracey muttered. He was ignoring the fact that Tara, similar to him, though to a less extreme extent, also had a knack for picking up on behaviors and feelings. It didn't hurt that they had a particularly strong sibling bond between them.

Tara sighed and poked her brother in the ribs, hard enough to hurt. "Don't be so grumpy," she chastised as Tracey rubbed his ribs. "We don't get to see you very often, you know we're going to take the opportunity to pick on you. What do you see in Alex anyway? He's a nice guy, yeah, but really… He's never been one to get his hands dirty, he's not a very good trainer, he's not particularly funny, and, according to Marie, homeboy in Pallet is way hotter."

Tracey gave a sudden laugh and shot his sister an amused look. "Did you just say 'homeboy'?"

"What do you know? I made you laugh," Tara replied dryly, examining her fingernails. "Going to answer my question?"

"No."

"Because there is no reason, right?" Tracey sighed and shook his head exasperatedly, causing Tara to grin as she spoke up again. "You can try denying it all you want, Trace, deep down you're just a horny teenage boy. You want to get laid."

Tracey turned red and nearly fell off the swing at Tara's sudden announcement. "That's not true," he quickly defended.

"Well, I suppose at this point you'll settle for a blow job, right?" Tara glanced at him slyly, as though she were bargaining and Tracey sighed again.

"Fine," he huffed. "There's some truth to that…"

"A hand job, then," Tara said airily.

"It's not all about sex, Tara! Yes, maybe I want something other than my hand for once, but there's more to it than that! I want to be in a relationship, even if it's short. I want to see what it's like and learn from it –"

"I get the point," Tara interrupted dryly, holding up her hand to silence Tracey before he continued. "Learning experience and all that jazz. Do you really think you can do that with someone who is clearly not your type? Or that you can't do that with someone you really like and actually is your type?"

Tracey sighed and seemed to deflate a bit at his sister's words. "What are you getting at?"

"Do you like Alex, yes or no?"

Tracey groaned in annoyance – his family was starting to be too much this evening – and then thought for a moment. Did he like this boy? Well, a bit; they had been friends after all, but that wasn't the type of like that Tara was asking about. He hesitated a few seconds and then answered honestly. "No."

A smile and then Tara replied with quiet question. "Who do you like, then?"

Immediately, Tracey's mind jumped to the very person he had been thinking of when Tara had come out of the house. It was the same person he thought about every night, the same person he imagined he was with whenever he and Alex kissed. The same person that was always on his mind these days – Gary. Whenever Alex tangled his hands in his hair during a make out session, he wished it was Gary's hands. Whenever Alex groped his way down Tracey's chest and stomach, he wished it was Gary grinning mischievously at him as his tongue snaked out to tease him…

A sudden chirp from his cell phone interrupted Tracey from his thoughts, signaling a new message. He pulled it from his pocket and quickly recognized the number; it was Gary's. Curiously, he opened the newest text message and was greeted with a picture of a group of Lapras on the ocean. Below it was the message: "It made me think of you." Tracey sighed a bit sadly and held the phone out to Tara to show her.

Tara smiled again as she looked at the message. "Is this from him?" she asked softly. Tracey nodded silently. "That's sweet of him. You're on his mind, Trace, more than a normal friend would be."

"I can't stop thinking about him, Tara," Tracey blurted out after a moment. He smiled one last time at Gary's message and slipped the phone into his pocket – he could reply later. "He has a lot going on and it's really giving him a lot of issues, but he's a good guy and he can be really nice and sweet when he wants to be."

Tara's smile faded and she suddenly looked more serious than she had in the past few minutes. "He likes you, Trace, how do you think going back to Pallet and saying 'I dated some guy I don't really care about but I won't date you' is going to make him feel?"

"I would never say that!"

"Would you tell him that you dated another guy?"

"I guess so," Tracey replied with a small shrug. He knew Gary would assume that was what had happened anyway, especially after their final conversation on the ferry to the Orange Islands.

"Anyone in a similar situation would mentally add that last part. It doesn't matter if he's the most confident guy in the world, he's still human, the thought will still come up," Tara reasoned. "How do you think it would make him feel?" she asked again.

Tracey sighed yet again but answered honestly. "It would upset him. He wouldn't show it and I know he wouldn't admit it, but it would definitely hurt him. I don't know how much he would trust me afterwards, which would be the worst thing possible, with how closed off he is. I'm the only person he talks to about this," he admitted. Saying it out loud made him suddenly realize how much he liked Gary and how little he was into his current relationship. It made him feel horrible that he had gotten into a relationship that he didn't really care for and he realized what his sister was getting at. "Fine," he resigned. "I'll call it off with Alex."

"Are you going to do anything with your Pallet boy?"

Tracey considered her question for a moment before answering. "When it comes to Gary, it's hard to say. I mean, I'd like to, but it's not just my decision. It all depends on him as much as it depends on me. The most I can do is try reading his moods and hint that I'd like –"

"Guys suck with subtlety," Tara interrupted blandly. "You're better off just being blunt."

"And possibly scaring him off? Gary's smarter than most people, he catches details… It's one reason I like him."

Tara shook her head. "Whatever you say. Just get somewhere with him by Christmas and I'll be happy for you." Tracey glanced at her curiously.

"Christmas?" he asked.

"Yeah, that holiday in December where we buy lots of crap for each other. That gives you six months. I wonder if you actually have it in you to do it."

"That sounds like a challenge to me," Tracey mused with a faint smile. Tara always had a way of lighting a fire in him to get him to do something. He felt a shot of determination go through him and he grinned at his twin sister. "I bet I can get somewhere with him before our birthday."

This time Tara laughed. "First you've got to break up with Alex."

… … …


	13. Chapter 12

**Secrets Kept**

Hurray for two-chapter updates! Here's part two of two. :)

It may or may not be obvious in this chapter, but I have a passion for shark research and parts of this were inspired by our most recent Shark Week.

Chapter 12

The flesh was rough under his hands but he paid no attention: his hands, forearms, and legs already bore abrasions from the sandpaper-like skin of the predatory pokemon. Two weeks into the research trip meant that the teenager was somewhat used to the mild injuries. Slowly sliding his hand along the Sharpedo's back from it's head, he spread his fingers at the base of the dorsal fin, carefully feeling for the vein that ran close to the surface of the powerful musculature of the creature. A grad school student in her mid-twenties glared at him as she stretched a measuring tape over his head along the creature's back. Gary stood his ground and shot a glare right back at her, focusing on finding the vein even as the Sharpedo thrashed suddenly. Across from him, Professor Birch worked swiftly with two more grad students to affix a GPS tracker to the dorsal fin. Next to him, Professor Ivy used a scalpel to remove a small sample of flesh from a pectoral fin.

"Time?" Professor Ivy called out.

Professor Birch glanced up and met Gary's eyes questioningly; Gary shook his head. "Focus," the professor instructed gently, yet firmly.

"Eight minutes and twenty-seven seconds!" called a handsome young man from the University of Cinnabar. He was a marine biology major and Gary often found his gaze flickering to the older boy throughout the trip.

With both professors in such close proximity and the pokemon having been out of the water for so long, the pressure was on. Being the grandson of the great Professor Oak did not make Gary immune to it; if anything, it made the pressure all the more intense. College students, grad school or otherwise, were jealous and bitter of the fact that he was allowed to participate at such a young age and loathed the favoritism the two professors showed. He couldn't help it that the professors liked working with someone who actually took initiative and worked hard.

The handsome college student moved into Gary's line of sight, jotting down notes on the appearance of the Sharpedo, and shot a small, reassuring smile at Gary. Gary took a deep breath and returned his attention to his search for a vein from which to draw blood. As the creature squirmed again, his fingers ran over a slight raise in the flesh and Gary pressed his fingers against it, pleased when he felt the slight pulse of pumping blood below the blue flesh.

"Found it," he breathed. A blonde girl from Hoenn handed him a large needle and Gary carefully positioned it, pushed it in, and began raising the syringe slowly. He watched, transfixed, as the attached vial began to fill with thick red fluid. Once it filled, he pulled the needle free, capped it, and passed it back to the blonde girl, who frowned at him.

"Took long enough," she snapped. It was only the second time Gary had the misfortune of working with her and both times, thus far, had been filled with spiteful attitude from her.

"I'd like to see you do that with such an agitated Sharpedo," the handsome marine biology major retorted from his position near the Sharpedo's head.

Stung by the girl's attitude but pleased with the young man's defense, Gary said nothing, keeping his head low as he rubbed ointment on the puncture left behind by the needle.

"That attitude is unnecessary, Jacklyn," Professor Ivy spoke up without glancing up from the vial that she was labeling. "I hear another comment like that, and you will be in the computer lab, crunching data, for the rest of your trip."

Gary heard the girl scoff and then retreat from the platform that sat just above the water on the side of the research boat. He sighed, eyes downcast, as he ran his hand over the rough blue skin once more.

He envied the water-type.

Though far from simple, they didn't have to deal with the hostile jealousy that humans could use as a harsh weapon. The pokemon were simpler than humans and Gary longed for a similar simplicity. He wanted to be free of the alienation he felt from most of the rest of the research team.

"Tracker attached," Professor Birch announced.

"Time?" Professor Ivy demanded once more.

"Twelve minutes and six seconds!"

"Alright, let's get this boy back in the water," Birch declared, standing up and making his way around the shark-like creature to Gary's side. "Come on, Gary, if we suit up fast enough, we'll be able to dive with them."

Gary sighed sadly, running his hand along the Sharpedo one last time. He stood as the platform began to lower into the water and quickly climbed the ladder up leading up the side of the boat. The other members of the team were scurrying about, eager to watch the pokemon swim off. As he moved along the side of boat, heading towards the bow, he could hear the mutterings of the others: the usual sneers and taunts of the team members. He refused to ever give in to their comments, no matter how badly he wanted to; the last thing he was willing to do was hurt his chances of being involved in future projects by responding negatively to people he was stuck working with.

He reached a bench at the bow and retrieved his water bottle from next to his bag. No one else was there and he was pleased with the momentary privacy, but the pleasure was short lived as he opened the bottle and noticed that someone had spit in it for the third time this week. His anger got the best of him and he hurled the bottle against the side of the boat, cursing furiously. It burst open as it hit the side of the boat and rolled backwards to the bench he stood at, spilling water all over as it traveled. Groaning desperately, Gary sank down on the bench. He was sick of the garbage he dealt with at the hands of his team mates. It was immature and horribly hurtful, though he hid it well, only allowing the frustration to surface when he wandered about the grounds of the Valencia University Laboratory late at night.

He heard footsteps approach and pointedly looked away from the direction they came in. A moment later, he heard someone open and fish through one of the coolers on deck. A few seconds later, someone held a bottle of Gatorade in front of him and Gary warily glanced up to see the same handsome young man who had defended him a few moments earlier. The drink was orange, a flavor he wasn't fond of, but the bottle was unopened and, thus, untouched, so he took it gratefully.

"They're assholes, don't let them get to you," the boy said as he sat down next to Gary. "I've worked with that Jacklyn girl before, at Seafoam Island, you should have seen the way she treated this one gay junior from Cerulean. It could be a lot worse," he offered.

"Good thing I'm in the closet then," Gary muttered, just barely loud enough for the other boy to hear. Realizing what he had just said, he stiffened, instantly regretting it. Had he really just said that to a near stranger? He mentally kicked himself and prepared for the worst.

The other boy stared at him for a moment, clearly surprised, then smiled faintly. "I know what you mean," he agreed. He stood and clapped a hand on Gary's shoulder, still smiling. "By the way, great job with the blood work today." He winked and sauntered off, leaving Gary feeling slightly confused and taken aback.

Gary felt something akin to shock: not only had the boy accepted his slip but he had essentially admitted to the same thing _and _then flirted with him! This was the first time another guy had so openly flirted with him – Tracey was the only other guy to flirt with him and even then, it was never blatant. Tracey was far too shy and reserved to be open with his flirting. Gary's thoughts took a turn for the perverse as he watched the other boy leave the bow, but another voice cut through the fantasies.

"Hammerhead spotted off the starboard side, suit up before it disappears – they're damn rare," Professor Birch rambled excitedly, tossing his flippers and mask at him.

Gary blinked in mild confusion for a moment before his brain comprehended what the professor had said, then hid his drink in his bag before hurrying to the dive platform off the back of the boat. Swimming with a hammerhead shark sounded like a brilliant follow-up to working with the Sharpedo.

… … …

Gary grumbled under his breath as he heaved a full tank of air into the proper place along the side of the boat. He couldn't help but wonder why he bothered to volunteer to help with the arduous task of cleaning up the boat every night when none of his peers appreciated the work he put into it. His two superiors certainly appreciated it but, then again, their professionalism prevented them from treating him like absolute garbage like his peers had been doing since the start of the trip. Further along the side of the boat, Professor Birch was taking an inventory of their materials, humming cheerfully as he left Gary to his own devices.

Sighing lightly, Gary returned to the air compressor and reached for another used SCUBA tank, pausing when he noticed a dark, lumpy, and sticky substance running down the sides of the next tank. In the dim light of twilight, it took a moment for his eyes to recognize the dark reddish brown of congealed fish blood that had been sitting in a bucket on deck all day. A distinct feeling of disgust rose in him as he noticed a lump of fish guts sitting atop the tank, on the valve where the regulator hooked up to the tank. His eyes slid over the tank and the surrounding ones, noticing more chum spread over at least three other tanks and splattered along the side of the boat and the floor. The chum bucket was strapped in the corner of the boat, many feet away, and Gary knew that there was no accidental way for the repulsive substance to end up all over like this.

"Fuck!" Gary whirled away from the sight and slammed his hand down on the side of the boat in pure frustration. "Why does everyone insist on doing this stupid shit every day?" he exclaimed, pacing away a few steps before turning back and stalking over to the hose at the back of the boat. He jerked the knob irritably and stalked back to the tanks to hose them off, cursing the whole way. Once they were clean, he turned the hose off and threw it back in place, angrier than he could remember ever being in the past few weeks that he had been involved in the research trip.

"Gary, breathe. Let it go," Professor Birch reassured from a few feet away. Gary groaned, knowing that the professor had seen his momentary loss of control. The professor watched him for a moment, then smiled slightly. Gary could see from his expression that he had come up with an idea. "Want to go for a night dive? There's a place not far –"

"How is that supposed to help everyone around here pulling this type of shit?" Gary blurted out, frustrated with the professor's lack of solution. He regretted it the moment the words were out of his mouth and he shook his head, raking a hand through his hair. "Forget it," he muttered, quickly resuming his task.

Professor Birch stopped what he was doing and walked over to where Gary was. He placed a hand over Gary's as the teenager hooked up another tank to the air compressor, effectively stopping him. Gary looked up at him challengingly but the professor smiled a bit and stood his ground. "At this point in your career the only people who are going to truly appreciate the work you do are your supervisors – if you're lucky, there'll be a few others. The people at your same level are going to be jealous of the fact that you are younger and far more experienced than them, and they'll be blinded by that jealousy. There is nothing you can do about it, other than leave the profession and come back in five or six years. Of course, if you do that, you'll never have the chances you'll get if you keep up what you're doing. You just have to stick with it and ignore the others. I've been there, so has your grandfather, so has Ivy, Elm, even Rowan. There's a reason we're so well known. Go after what you want," he paused and smiled again. "In everything, not just research. No point in being successful if there's no one to share it with." He leaned against the side of the boat with a wink and watched as Gary turned on the compressor and filled the tank with air. "Speaking of, I hear your sister's friends are pretty interested in you."

Gary laughed sharply and switched the tank with an empty one, which he began to fill with a shake of his head. "They like me for the same reasons the grad students hate me," he replied with a touch of bitterness to his voice.

"Oh, I'm sure there are other reasons."

"Enlighten me," Gary shot back, rolling his eyes.

"There's your looks, your sense of humor…"

"Yeah, because sarcasm is so big with the ladies."

The professor laughed at the sarcastic response. "Maybe just looks then."

Gary straightened as he turned off the compressor, finally done refilling the tanks, and crossed his arms across his chest. "I attract shallow idiots – that's practically all there is in Pallet – and the one person I actually _do_ like goes for someone who can't even properly feed his pokemon," he bluntly informed the older researcher. "That's my luck when it comes to relationships, so forgive me if I don't seem too enthused about trying to find someone to share 'success with'. Maybe one day I'll find someone, but not anytime soon, so there's no point in putting any effort into it when I still have so much further to go to become a researcher."

Professor Birch sighed, his mentor had warned him about his grandson's attitude and cynicism, but he hadn't expected to experience it so early into this conversation. He had, of course, planned this particular conversation with Gary after Professor Oak had confided a concern over the teen to the younger professor. "Well, what do you know? We're getting somewhere!" he exclaimed, forcing a smile which faded when Gary glared at him.

"May put you up to this, didn't she?"

"No one puts me up to anything: I notice a situation or a concern and I take initiative. How do you think I made it this far as a professor at my age? With that attitude, it's no wonder you spend so much of your time back home with a hangover," he shot back, deciding to challenge Gary on the chance that he might actually talk.

"I don't spend that much time hung over," Gary frowned, wondering where the professor had gotten his information. Most likely May, one of the biggest gossips in Pallet.

"That's because you're young enough that you recover quickly. From what I hear, it's every day of the weekend and multiple times in the week. Are you sure you really don't care about finding someone to share success with? Because it seems to me that you care a lot and you're trying to drown those feelings rather than act on them –"

"I _can't _act on them!" Gary interrupted loudly, frustrated beyond belief at this point and certain that May had talked the professor into talking to him. He regretted announcing this fact the moment it slipped out of his mouth.

"Just because the girl is with another guy, doesn't mean you can't tell her how you feel."

It took a huge amount of effort to stop himself from rolling his eyes or correcting the professor. "That's not the issue."

"So then what is? Is it one of May's friends?"

Gary sighed and pondered his answer briefly. "Technically, yeah, they're one of her friends," he admitted.

"Then talk to her and ask her permission if you're that worried. I'm sure she'd give it."

Gary shook his head impatiently and paced along the deck of the boat. "You don't understand, you wouldn't – it's more complicated than that." He wasn't entirely sure why he was talking so much and wondered if it had anything to do with the fact that he hadn't really talked to Tracey much recently or if it was the stress of the research work making him more talkative. He had always liked and trusted Professor Birch, so perhaps it had something to do with that as well.

"I doubt it's as complicated as you think it is. What, are you worried about your friends? Don't, I'm sure you don't like every one of _their_ girlfriends." Gary closed his eyes and shook his head again. "If you're worried about them, then maybe you should bring it up with them –"

He stopped talking as Gary laughed a bit helplessly and rubbed his temples for a moment. He stopped pacing and rested his forearms on the side of the boat and gazed out at the still water of the small bay.

He could just imagine his friends' responses to him bringing up the idea of dating Tracey. Wyatt would taunt him the same way he had when Gary had refused to down an entire glass of rum with him a month back, "_don't be such a faggot, Gary_." In actuality, the other boy had been drunk and it had only been a friendly tease, but Gary had taken it differently. Darren would likely change the subject entirely, as he always did. "_I learned how to play blah blah blah by random metal band_!" and then he would play a riff on guitar, which was exactly what he had done every time Gary had worked up the courage to admit to him that he didn't like girls. It always diminished Gary's courage instantaneously and left him feeling as though his best friend couldn't care less. Mike, the homophobic fool, would immediately dismiss his friendship, he had no doubt of this, and he was certain Chase would follow suit – he always copied Mike. Brandon and Adrian would laugh, assuming that it was a joke – Chase would do the same, if he didn't have Mike's lead to follow first.

In the end, he would feel even worse. There was no point in even thinking about dating Tracey.

It wasn't worth having a relationship if he had to hide it.

"It wouldn't work out," he finally said sadly. "They wouldn't accept it. You would think, after millions of years of evolution, humans would be more open-minded but that's too much to ask for."

"You forget that humans are just animals who have evolved slightly differently. We may be more adaptable, but we're still animals. Some people demonstrate that more than others. And you might be surprised at how people exceed our expectations. So… night dive?"

Gary shook his head with a minute sigh but agreed in hopes that it would clear his mind and help him feel better. If anything, it would tire him out enough to fall right asleep upon returning to his room.

By the time they returned to the boat, Gary had all but forgotten his concern over his friends' approval of his interest in Tracey – and of the conversation the professor had started after the incident with chum and the air tanks. He and the professor both unhooked their regulators from the tanks and vests and began to rinse the saltwater from their equipment. They worked in silence for several minutes, the only sound being that of small waves bouncing against the boat and running water from the hose on board.

Professor Birch refilled the tanks wordlessly as Gary hung the equipment to dry overnight. Gary leaned against the side of the boat, watching the professor return the tanks to their proper place and then slip into the cabin to retrieve two glass bottles from a miniature refrigerator.

"Weren't you saying something about me getting drunk too often a little while ago?" Gary asked as the professor opened the bottles and passed one to him.

"Do you honestly think I'm going to let you get drunk?" The professor asked, taking a sip of his beer and leaning against the side of the boat as well. "It's one drink and I think you've earned this one." He was quiet for a moment before casually attempting to revive the conversation from earlier. "Seeing as we're already on the topic… Why _do_ you drink so much? You've only just turned seventeen and we both know the Kanto drinking age is twenty-one."

Gary rolled his eyes and took a long sip from his own bottle. It was something of a rare treat for any of the teenagers in Pallet to be able to drink beer – cheap vodka, rum, and tequila were all much stronger and Wyatt, May, and some of the other older girls were experts at getting it despite their young age. "What else is there to do in Pallet?" he asked the professor pointedly.

"Anything at the beach, anything with pokemon, sports… The list could go on and on."

"That's limited to the day. There's nothing to do once the sun sets."

Professor Birch frowned slightly, taking another small sip of his own drink. "You're telling me that you guys drink purely out of boredom? I'm not sure I buy that." He saw thought he saw Gary roll his eyes but couldn't be sure in the darkness. "How do you like being back in Pallet? It's been a year since you moved back." Gary gave a small shake of his head and groaned softly. "That doesn't sound particularly good."

"It's not," Gary admitted, surprisingly calmly. "I can barely stand it there." He left it at that and didn't say any more.

The professor waited a moment for Gary to continue. When the teen said nothing else, he pressed a bit more. "Why?" he asked curiously.

Gary sighed and drained the remaining fluid from his bottle, closing his eyes briefly as he turned the glass idly in his hands. Having had little to eat that day, especially within the last several hours, he could already feel the alcohol affecting him faintly. "It's just not a particularly enjoyable place to be around every day. It'd fine for a week or two but then it just gets really old really fast."

Birch gestured for him to continue. "Details?"

"It's just being stuck in the same place every day, doing the same thing and seeing the same people."

"Ah," said the professor, nodding knowingly. "You're sick of being around your sister and Tracey all day, huh?"

Gary couldn't help but smile slightly at the mention of Tracey's name. "Tracey I can deal with, but May can be a pain… Not as much as her friends though."

Professor Birch smiled, pleased that Gary was actually opening up somewhat. He finished his drink, retrieved two more bottles, and passed another to Gary. If the small amount of alcohol would make him talk, then he would give them to him. "Her friends are annoying?"

"You have no idea. They flirt nonstop; I'm not even the slightest bit interested in them. I could care less about them."

The professor raised his eyebrows. "A teenage boy isn't interested in his older sister's attractive friends who keep flirting with him? Sounds a bit odd to me. You sure that girl you like isn't one of them?" he teased lightly, eliciting an eye roll from the teen.

"They're annoying, ditzy, and only care about fashion and partying. Could you honestly see me dating anyone like that?"

"Well, when you put it that way, it's a little hard to see it happening. Doesn't mean it's impossible though."

Gary took a long drink and shook his head. "I don't like any of May's friends that way and I am not interested in any of them," he replied firmly. "The person I like is nothing like them." _In personality or gender_, he added mentally.

"You say that now," Birch teased. "Opposites attract you know; another few years and you might end up with one of May's prissy little friends."

"Oh, I know opposites attract." _We might have a lot in common_, he thought in reference to Tracey, _but we're definitely opposites_. "And, I'm telling you, it is not one of May's friends."

"I thought you said it was?"

Gary shook his head, unable to prevent an amused grin from spreading across his face. "Not one of those friends and, no, I'm not telling you who it is. And I know you wouldn't be able to guess who it is either."

Birch laughed at this. "I wouldn't try to guess – I don't know that many people your age in Pallet. So, what is this person like?"

Gary shrugged, playing idly with the now-empty bottle in his hands. "Smart, quiet, artistic… Cute…"

"Knows a lot about pokemon?" Gary nodded in response to the question and Birch smiled. "Sounds a bit like a female version of Tracey, don't you think?"

Gary froze for a moment before he was able to shrug off the unexpected comment. He couldn't think of a verbal response to reply with out of fear of letting something more slip. Fortunately, the professor spoke up again and Gary didn't need a reply.

"Well, look at the time," he said suddenly, glancing at his watch. "It's almost midnight. Better get to bed soon, we've got an early day tomorrow."

Sighing in resignation, Gary moved away from the side of the boat and followed the professor on to the dock and towards the dorms that everyone involved in the research project was staying in. He felt a bit disappointed that the time alone on the boat with the professor had come to such a sudden end, despite the slight twinge of fear he had occasionally felt as the conversation turned towards his potential love life. It had felt nice to actually talk to someone who was a bit older than himself and Tracey and even May, but was still younger than his grandfather or even the parents of some of his friends. After talking to the professor, he couldn't keep his mind off of Tracey and couldn't help but think that, were he actually out of the closet and not so worried about the reactions of his friends and family, they might make a good couple.

Regardless, he was certain that the possibility was entirely farfetched and not at all likely to come to reality.

… … …

Thunder rumbled loudly as large dark clouds moved across the island. Lightning flashed nearby and Umbreon buried her nose deeper under the blanket that Gary had placed on the floor for her. The rain being thrown harshly against the window by the wind did nothing to wake her trainer, despite her soft whines. She had always hated thunderstorms and, back home, would huddle against Gary's side until it passed, often with Arcanine nearby. She would climb on the bed if it weren't for the fact that her trainer had stretched out across the entire thing, completely exhausted from the long day on the boat and the night dive with the professor, and slightly buzzed from the drinks they had shared.

Gary stirred slightly at a particularly loud bang of thunder but did not awake, despite it being three hours past the time he was normally woken up while working with Ivy and Birch's research team. The storm had approached in the early hours of the morning and the weather was nasty enough to call off the ocean work for the day so the professors hadn't even bothered with the morning wakeup call over the intercom in the dorms that the team stayed in at the small university that Professor Ivy's lab was a part of.

Sick of being on the floor, Umbreon huffed and jumped up on the bed, purposely stepping on Gary as much as possible while she searched for a comfortable position. Gary groaned and shifted under her weight.

"The hell, 'Bre? Get off…" he complained, burying his face in a pillow. She responded only by curling up in the tiny space between him and the wall, kicking him as she did so. He groaned again and rolled over to glance at his pokemon. "_What_? It's not even time to get up yet, Umbreon." Another loud thunderclap sounded outside the window and Umbreon gave a small shudder, eliciting a sigh from Gary as he realized what her problem was. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a hug, stroking her fur. "It's just a loud noise," he murmured, still groggy from the rude awakening by his pokemon.

Gary closed his eyes and relaxed against the pillows again, still gently petting Umbreon. He hoped to quickly fall back asleep but realized that he felt far better rested than he normally had during his stay – as though he'd had a few hours of extra sleep. A glance at the alarm clock revealed that it indeed was several hours later than the usual wakeup call.

Cursing, Gary jumped out of the bed and grabbed a pile of clean clothes from the desk. "Come on, 'Bre – I'm going to be in so much trouble!"

Umbreon followed him as he hurried out of the dorm and down the hall towards the bathroom. As he headed down the hall, another member of the research team – a senior biology student at some university in Hoenn – appeared, heading towards his own dorm with a textbook under his arm. The older boy sneered at Gary, who rolled his eyes in return.

"Catch up on your beauty sleep, Oak?"

"I can think of someone who needs it more than me," he shot back and kept walking

Events like this forcibly reminded Gary of the way he had once treated Ash. It made him feel terrible but he couldn't help but feel that, on some level, he deserved the treatment, if only as karma for treating an old friend like shit for many years.

A few moments later, he found himself standing at the open door to the office shared by both professors. Birch and Ivy were looking over what appeared to be evaluations of researchers while speaking in hushed tones barely loud enough for Gary to hear from his place in the doorway. Birch was in the middle of complaining about one girl's lack of willingness to get her hands dirty when Ivy noticed Gary. She smiled and greeted him, gesturing for him to enter the already crowded room.

As he sat down in the one empty seat in the office, Birch quickly gathered up the scattered pile of evaluations, but not before Gary caught glimpses of the written words on the papers. He couldn't help but wonder who had been the unlucky person to have Professor Ivy write that they were "utterly horrible at working with team members" and had been "observed being exceptionally rude and even cruel to others." He was willing to bet it was that bitch Jacklyn from Hoenn.

"I take it you figured out we weren't going out in the boats today," Ivy observed calmly, leaning back in her seat and taking a sip of her coffee.

"I would think that the lack of an alarm clock being playing over the intercom at five-thirty in the morning would be sufficient to get that point across," Birch replied with a yawn.

"I figured it out when I saw people from the boat in the halls," Gary admitted.

He was only in the office for a short while longer while they discussed the plans for the final week of the trip before Professor Ivy led him down the hall to one of the labs so he could help out with some of the reports that needed to be added to the computer. Of course, he didn't so much help as do all of the work – the moment the professor left the room, all of the work had been dumped on him while everyone else talked and goofed off. Though this initially irritated him, he quickly lost himself in the work while listening to music on his iPod and the large amount of work was done in just a few short hours. Once he was done, Professor Ivy had seemed surprised at the amount of work done in the short amount of time. Once she admitted surprise, the college students were quick to jump in and claim that they had all worked together to complete the work. Of course, the professor saw through the lies and smiled mildly while peering through the files on the computer.

"All of the files were completed correctly and are in the same format," she observed over Gary's shoulder. "With half a dozen people working on them, there should be some discrepancies between the files. Not to mention they should be spread amongst the six computers," she mused aloud.

"They were all compiled," a student from the Johto region claimed. Still facing his computer, Gary closed his eyes briefly, forcing himself to breathe and tune out the lies that the others uttered to the professor.

Ivy frowned and snatched up a three-ring binder from Gary's desk. "Of course they were compiled," she snapped, flipping open the binder and gesturing to the hand-written reports filling it. "They were compiled before they were entered by _one_ person on a _single_ computer! I've been working with researchers for over twenty years, I've been running my own teams for fifteen years; do you really think I can't tell when an undedicated child lies to me?"

She then proceeded to point out every single flaw she had noticed in each of the students during the two week duration of the trip before turning to Gary and praising his unending hard work. It was somewhat intimidating, perhaps a bit scary, to see a woman who was normally so kind and laid back turn into a cold and critical overseer, quick to forcefully show others their place. It just went to show that, no matter how nice and mild-mannered the most successful researchers were, they had all developed a hardened skin and were able to command a room full of twenty-something-year-old college students. Gary was reminded about something Birch had said on the boat the night before – every professor went through the exact trials he was going through before becoming successful. Every trial he faced and conquered calmly and professionally earned him more respect from his superiors, as was indicated by Ivy's next move: an inquiry into his dissection skills, something which both confused and intrigued Gary.

"I've pretty much taken over dissections and necropsies back home," he told her honestly. It was true; his grandfather had taken advantage of the teen's strong stomach, determined focus, and attention to detail by sending pretty much anything involving a scalpel Gary's way. Though quite excited by the extra responsibility, Gary had also been frustrated by what he viewed as something like a reward for being a brat or a bribe to be better behaved.

The students all seemed to roll their eyes or mutter under their breath; obviously this was not going to help him when it came to them. Professor Ivy considered his words and nodded before directing him down the hall to a different lab where Professor Birch was preparing to do a necropsy on a dead Sharpedo that had been found by fishermen the day before. The handsome young man from Cinnabar, whom Gary had spoken to on the boat yesterday, along with two students who had essentially ignored him for the entirety of the trip were in the lab as well, preparing to assist. In what seemed to be no time, Gary was carefully slicing into the rough skin of the pokemon, guided by the professor while the Cinnabar student helped when needed. The other two students were delegated the task of photographing and taking notes of the procedure. Neither student seemed happy with this arrangement and, at the end of it, were as rude to Gary as just about every other student had been.

Frustrated and near his wit's end, Gary headed outside shortly after they were done with the necropsy, desperate for an escape from the juvenile bullshit that went on in the labs and dorms. The rain had stopped by now, the storm having moved on while he had been preparing to help with the necropsy. The air outside was humid and stifling, yet so much more bearable than the air-conditioned buildings of the university and Gary began to feel a bit more at ease as he meandered along the stone paths through the gardens towards the water. If he went towards the west, he would be at the docks where the research boats were located; of course, if he went there, he would risk running into others from the research team. Instead, he headed east, wandering through the woods before coming to a quiet beach that was currently empty, likely due to the overcast and rainy weather that had hovered around the island all day.

Even as he calmed down a bit, he was still incredibly stressed and frustrated. He couldn't help but miss Pallet at least a little bit; back home, he never had to deal with garbage like what he had been experiencing here. If anything, he always had support about his research opportunities and his friends and sister were often excited for him getting new responsibilities in his grandfather's lab or chances to do something new out in the field. Sure, they would pick on him for being a bit of a nerd sometimes, but it was never in a less than friendly way. Gary suddenly felt the urge to talk to someone, anyone really, from Pallet. Tracey, of course, was his first choice but he didn't want to bother the other boy with his issues right now. Especially not if he had started dating the guy from the ferry; even if he didn't like the guy, he wasn't about to risk interrupting Tracey's time with him just so he could vent. He had actually spoken to May quite a bit in the last two weeks, largely because she had called him nearly every night.

Without really thinking about it, Gary slipped his cell phone out of his pocket and pressed the speed dial button for the house back home. At this time of day, May was likely to be home.

The phone rang only once before a familiar voice answered with a cheerful, "Oak labs."

"Darren?" Gary mentally cursed at the sound of his friend's voice. He had apparently pushed the wrong button and accidentally called the lab instead of the house, something he did far more often than he preferred to admit.

"Gary!" Darren exclaimed happily before immediately beginning to chatter on excitedly about what seemed to be absolutely everything under the sun.

Gary couldn't help but laugh at his friend – Darren, as intelligent as he was and as mature as he could occasionally be, was forever a six-year-old with his cheerful chatter and sensitive nature. He realized with a pang the he hadn't spoken to his best friend since an argument they had gotten in nearly a week before he had even left Pallet. The poor boy really did put up with a lot being his best friend.

Darren paused when Gary laughed. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing," Gary replied with a shake of his head. "I miss you," he admitted quietly.

"You don't say things like that very often," Darren observed, calming down a bit. "People still treating you like crap down there?"

"Yeah, they are," Gary sighed. He didn't even have to ask to know that May had been the one to tell him that and, as was typical for Darren, the other boy had quickly figured out the reason behind the call home.

"Well, at least you've gotten to go diving with all sorts of sharks and pokemon and stuff. That must have been awesome." Gary gave a noncommittal response; he'd certainly enjoyed the many dives he had done in the Orange Islands the past two weeks but he didn't feel much like talking about what he had done on the trip thus far. Talking about what he had gotten to do would only serve as a reminder of all the garbage he'd had to deal with as a result. He much preferred hearing his friend ramble on about nothing important than actually talk. "Wyatt and Chase are so jealous of you, man, they're under the impression that you're surrounded by babes and nerds so you must be getting so much pussy." Gary rolled his eyes at this, of course those two sex-crazed morons would think that. "I tried telling them that that's not how it is, but we all know how well they listen."

Gary sighed softly and shook his head. "I'm not even like that either," he pointed out. Hadn't his friends at least noticed that he cared about things other than getting laid?

"Yeah, I know – you're way more focused on the work you have to do than having sex with any girl who'll have you."

Gary hesitated a moment before replying. His first instinct was to somehow divert the conversation from the track it was starting to take, his second instinct was to point out that he just didn't care about girls, which would surely be a small step out of the closet with Darren. _What is there to lose at this point_? he thought to himself. Darren was being his usual kind and nonjudgmental self, which gave him a strange sort of confidence.

Gary drew in a deep breath and spoke again, forcing himself to sound calm and collected, despite the way his heart was pounding rapidly. "Well, there's more to it than that," he said slowly.

"I know," Darren said again, as cheerful and calm as ever. "There's types and all that, and I know you're picky with people."

Darren's response caught him off guard and Gary was slightly confused by it. "Picky?" he asked, wondering for a moment where the other boy was going with this.

"Well," Darren began slowly, as if he were taking a moment to think. "If you weren't picky, you would have already been with a bunch of people like everyone else, but you haven't, so I figured you were just picky."

His use of a gender-neutral word like "people" did not escape Gary's notice and he frowned slightly. Using gender-neutral words was usually his way of keeping his preference secret while still being a part of the sex and girl-based conversations his friends constantly had. Gary took a second to gather his courage once more before speaking again. "Picky is one way of putting it, but Dare' –"

"Hold on a sec, Gary," Darren interrupted suddenly. In the background, Gary could hear his grandfather enter the lab and he groaned, kicking at a rock on the ground.

_Figures_, he thought bitterly. He knew that, once Darren came back to the conversation, his confidence would have faded. There was no point in trying to get the other boy's attention again.

"Professor, Gary's on the phone!"

"Wait, Dare' – don't," Gary quickly interjected as he heard Darren offer the phone to the older man. He heard the phone being put down for the professor to pick up and he groaned. "Idiot," he muttered under his breath, waiting for his grandfather's greeting.

"Well hello, Gary. I'm surprised I haven't heard from you yet."

"Hey, Grandpa," Gary replied softly. He heard Darren say something in the background but couldn't make out the words. Whatever it was, it made his grandfather sigh and take a moment before speaking again.

"How is everything on Valencia Island?" the professor cautiously inquired.

"Fine."

The tone of Gary's response caused the professor to frown deeply. It was a flat tone with a slightly dejected edge to it that Gary normally adopted when something was bothering him and he didn't want to talk about it. "How is everyone treating you?"

"Fine," was the same flat reply, though this time there was a harder, defensive edge to it.

Professor Oak took a deep breath, counted to three, and exhaled slowly – May had told him days ago that the others were being terrible to Gary and Darren had mentioned it again just seconds prior. He was certain that the teenager had meant to call the house to talk to his sister; it wasn't unusual for him to be more open with May than most others even though, in recent months, Gary had pushed her away as much as he had everyone else – other than Tracey, that is. The professor knew his grandson well enough to read his tone and know that he was upset, the subdued greeting had been enough to get that point across.

"Gary," he began slowly, not entirely sure what exactly to say. "I know it's not easy to be the youngest person working on a team and I know some people will try to make it even harder, but it all pays off in the end. It just takes patience to get there."

Gary closed his eyes for a moment. "It's just frustrating," he admitted after a minute. "Everyone thinks I'm here because you're my grandfather or because I know Ivy and Birch already."

"I'm sorry to bring it up, Gary, but you'll always run into that problem. You'll face it all the time when you're trying to build experience and then some people will always question how you were able to gain experience at a young age. There really isn't anything you can do about it."

"I know that," Gary groaned.

"I have to be honest though," the professor continued, prompting Gary to roll his eyes slightly. The old man never seemed to shut up at times. "I meant it when I said you deserved this opportunity… In more ways than one." Gary frowned at this, unsure whether to be grateful or worried about what would come next. "On one hand, you really deserve the chance to work hard in the field with prominent researchers and prove your worth. On the other hand, you've been so rude and childish, and you've been getting into so much trouble this past year that you also kind of deserve this treatment: karma, if you will. I can't help but wonder if being humbled like this is exactly what you need to grow up a bit."

Gary was silent for several very long seconds, trying not to be so incredibly annoyed by the fact that his grandfather felt he deserved this treatment. Of course, he had a bitter and sarcastic response at the tip of his tongue but he chose not to say anything to acknowledge, or worse – agree with his grandfather's words and instead waited for him to speak again.

"I love you, Gary, you know that. Don't take it the wrong way," Professor Oak finally said, growing tired of waiting for Gary's nonexistent reply. "I just worry about you a lot with the way you act around home."

The words made Gary regret the mental come back that had been about to escape him a moment prior and he suspected that may have been one of the reasons behind his grandfather saying them. "I'm sorry," he apologized without thinking. He meant it, of course, but it had slipped out of his mouth without any thought or consideration being put into it.

"I just wish I knew what it is that makes you act that way."

Gary thought briefly of what he had been about to tell Darren before the sudden change in subject. He contemplated mentioning it to his grandfather then, when he opened his mouth to speak, realized that the words weren't going to come. He shut his mouth again and hesitated. "I'll tell you one day, Grandpa," he finally said quietly. "I promise."

The professor was quiet for a moment and Gary could tell he wasn't the happiest with the response. Finally, Professor Oak replied in a slightly-flat tone that Gary knew he tended to use when he was disappointed. "I hope so, Gary."

The disappointment in his voice was well-covered but Gary still caught a glimpse of it. Though the professor was only disappointed in his grandson's seemingly-dismissive attitude and closed-off nature, Gary's teenage mind interpreted the disappointment differently. On one hand, Gary knew exactly what was annoying his grandfather and he could even understand it to an extent, but he also felt as though the professor was discounting the fact that something major was obviously bothering him. He had carefully hidden his melancholic moods from everyone – other than Tracey, who always seemed to be willing to try to cheer him up – his temper, his moodiness, the skipping school, and the withdrawal from his friends should have all been large red flags.

He suddenly felt exhausted, mentally and physically, and just wanted the conversation to be over so he could go back to his dorm and sleep for the remainder of the afternoon. "Look, Grandpa, I've got to go back to the lab," Gary lied, intent on quickly ending the conversation.

"I know you're tired, you don't have to lie to me," Professor Oak replied smoothly. "But, before you go… Darren and May aren't the only ones who miss you. I miss having my grandson around in the lab… And you know I mean that in more than one way. I'll talk to you soon."

A numb feeling joined his exhaustion as Gary said goodbye and hung up the phone. He continued wandering along the path he was on until he reached the beach. He headed towards the water, his sneakers crunching over the wet sand, somewhat compacted by the constant pounding of rain that had been present since the earliest hours of the morning. His grandfather's words echoed in his head and he knew exactly what the professor had meant. He knew that he had not been like himself at all for much of the past year.

In the end, he felt unbearably disconnected from his true self in way that he had never experienced before. It took a moment to sink in, but as soon as he acknowledged, even subconsciously, that he felt disconnected from himself, Gary realized exactly what the problem had been over the past several months. It had not been his friends, as he had originally blamed it on; it had been him. His friends had only been acting like straight teenage boys, exactly as they should have been acting, and he had felt the normal peer pressure to be like them. It was an experience that was entirely foreign to him. He had been a fiercely independent child who never gave into pressure to do anything that he didn't want; plus, childhood innocence had prevented him from ever really looking into, or caring about, his own attraction to other males. He had then been away training until he was nearly fifteen and was largely focused on training, so never experienced much of the confusion of the early adolescent years. Working at Sayda Island until his sixteenth birthday had further prevented exposure to the feeling of sexual attraction and frustration, but especially the feeling of teenage peer pressure. At Sayda, he only dealt with people who were several years older than him – all in their twenties, except for Crystal, who was still a child – so peer pressure was nonexistant. On top of that, he was forever busy with working so he never had much free time to ponder his sexual feelings or attractions.

Moving back home to Pallet threw him into a complete and utter maelstrom of teenage hormones, pressure, and talk of nothing other than girls and sex. It was then that he had enough free time to notice and then focus on his own thoughts in a way that brought new facts about himself to the surface.

Somewhere along the line, there had been a disconnect and he had failed to fit the discovery of his sexuality into his view of himself.

He was never _gay_ in his self-view. _Gay_ was feminine, like his sister's few gay friends from Pallet – they were flamboyant and effeminate and loved fashion and shopping as much as the prissiest girls around. He was nothing like that, in fact, he was far more like his friends than he cared to admit; he was athletic, he could care less about fashion and despised shopping so much that he had purposely 'lost' his car keys to avoid having to take May when her car broke down a month earlier. He was, in general, a typical guy, as was Tracey. Tracey, in Gary's eyes, was never _gay_: he was quiet, artistic, smart, intelligent, and just… Tracey. And he happened to like guys instead of girls.

So why couldn't Gary view himself the same way. Couldn't he just be the same as he always had been while liking guys?

Gary frowned, deep in thought, and then laughed suddenly. It seemed so stupid now. Here he had been such a brat to everyone and had been putting himself through misery just because he had failed to see that he could still be the person he had always been, even though he had discovered a key difference between himself and most other people that he surrounded himself with.

He gazed at the ocean for another moment, mesmerized by the waves that were still just a touch rougher than usual from the recent storms. In that moment, he made a vow to himself to stop with all of the teenage bullshit. His grandfather had been right in the car before he had left Pallet – this bratty teen was not at all who he truly was. He was still Gary, he just happened to like guys and the one guy he really liked was Tracey. He could deal with that

With a small, self-satisfied smile, Gary returned to the lab, passing the asshole students with his head held high, giving only an amused smirk at their ridiculous comments. If they had a problem with him being devoted enough to be involved with research at his young age, then they could go fuck themselves. He couldn't care anymore.

With all of his confidence unexpectedly restored, he knocked on the office shared by the two professors and grinned when Birch answered the door.

"I heard awhile back that there's a reef nearby that Sharpedos frequent. Want to go diving?" he asked.

The professor returned the grin and clapped a hand on Gary's shoulder. "That's the Gary I know."

… … …

Author's Note…

Coming (hopefully) soon – Tracey and Gary return to Pallet, Gary works on not being an angsty brat, Tracey and Gary's relationship grows even more

On a totally different note, I am utterly thrilled that I got to use my favorite word in this chapter! Maelstrom. :) I'm such a nerd.


	14. Chapter 13

**Secrets Kept**

Oh. My. God. It's been like a year.

I can't believe how long it's been since I updated this. It's been a ridiculous amount of time and I am so incredibly sorry for the delay. I apologize for any missed typos, my new guinea pig, Loki, was out while I was writing parts of this chapter and he loves crawling all over my desk and keyboard. Let's just say Loki is a very fitting name for the little guy. Always into trouble. :)

Chapter 13

Tracey smiled faintly as he watched the ferry steadily draw closer to the Sunburst Harbor. He had mixed feelings about returning to Pallet and was simultaneously thrilled and filled with dread at the thought of returning to the lab, as was usual for whenever he was returning to his home Kanto from his home in the Orange Islands. The three weeks with his family had flown by far faster than he would have liked but he missed Pallet and was happy to be returning. Still, he hated to leave the island.

He turned away from the approaching boat with a small sigh and wondered briefly what the trip back to Pallet would be like and whether Gary had changed at all in the three week span that had passed since they had last seen each other. As he turned, he found his little sister standing behind him, looking sullen.

"You know, you could stay longer if you really wanted to," Marie said irritably, her arms crossed coolly over her chest.

"I could," Tracey agreed, nodding slowly, thinking out the best response to her words. "But my place is in Pallet. I need to visit more often though, I don't see you guys enough at all."

"That's for sure, brat," Tara spoke up, handing a large takeout bag full of food to Tracey. "Mom insisted on giving you the leftovers from lunch so you won't waste away on us," she explained with a roll of the eyes.

"Hey! My fried rice is in there!" Marie complained.

Tara rolled her eyes again but Tracey reached into the bag and handed Marie the little box of rice. He knew she wouldn't eat it but he also wasn't about to argue with a moody fourteen-year-old girl.

"What about my chicken?" asked another voice, this time Tracey's younger brother.

"It's for Tracey!" Tara declared indignantly.

"I'm not going to eat it anyway," Tracey replied calmly, pulling out that box as well.

"I was kidding," the sixteen-year-old pointed out, taking the box of food with a shrug.

This time Tracey rolled his eyes but ignored it. His brother, Josh, was the typical little brother – annoying as could be. He and Tracey got along rather well and, if it weren't for the long, sand-colored hair and green eyes, people could easily mistake Josh, rather than Tara, for Tracey's twin.

"I want my chicken too!"

"Stop being a brat, Marie."

"Josh breaks your iPod and I'm the brat?"

"It wasn't on purpose!"

"It's still broken!"

"I still don't get why I'm the brat and not him!"

Tracey groaned and rubbed his temples, amazed by how quickly the bickering had flared up between his siblings. "Am I the only sane one in this family?" he asked loudly enough to halt the argument.

Josh grinned mischievously at his elder brother. "You're obsessed with a guy who's gay and likes you, yet you won't make a move on him. You're crazy in your own gay way." He shot a glance at the ferry, which was now pulling up to the dock. "Think he's on there right now? Maybe we can jump on and tell him you like him –"

"Josh, I swear I will hurt you so badly if you even think about doing that!" Tracey snapped, suddenly turning red.

"Oh, what's this? Did Tracey suddenly grow a pair?" Josh shot back; Tracey could see he was trying not to laugh.

"I'm going to throw your food in the ocean, you pain in the ass!"

"We all know you wouldn't dare pollute like that, Trace," Tara smiled. Out of all of the Sketchit siblings, she was the one that was somewhat used to hearing the occasional curse slip out of him. Josh and Marie just laughed, having recovered from their momentary shock of hearing Tracey swear.

Tracey bit his lip to stop from laughing with them. From behind him, he heard a familiar bark. Turning around, he could see that the ferry was at the dock closest to them, and a very recognizable Umbreon had jumped up to balance on the railing of the boat. A second later, Tracey could hear Gary's familiar voice call to his pokemon.

"I'm not jumping in after you if you fall in, 'Bre – get down!"

Umbreon looked away from Tracey, wagged happily, and barked again before jumping down and running off.

"That's a nice Umbreon…"Josh murmured, still looking at the spot where Umbreon had just disappeared from.

"Gary's a fantastic trainer, you should see Umbreon in battle," Tracey commented, turning to smile at his brother and sisters.

"Thanks, Tracey."

He turned again to see Gary standing at the same spot Umbreon had just been, leaning against the railing of the boat with a smile of his own. Tracey couldn't help but grin at Gary's sudden appearance.

His friend looked genuinely happy, for once – tired, nearly exhausted, but in good had grown so used to seeing Gary in a bad mood that it was impossible not to be surprised to see him appearing happy and in his surprise, Tracey was momentarily at a loss for words.

"Hi, Gary," he finally said after a moment.

Gary seemed to catch on to Tracey's speechlessness and gave a small laugh, shaking his head slightly. Out of the corner of his eye, Tracey saw Tara drag Marie away with a grin and giggle; Josh seemed torn between staying with his brother and going with his sisters but followed the girls after a few seconds of hesitation.

Still unsure of what to say, Tracey shrugged helplessly and laughed uncomfortably. "My sisters both think you're hot," he blurted out.

Gary looked only mildly amused. His dark eyes flicked over to the retreating girls before settling his gaze on Tracey again, his smile not quite reaching his eyes. "Girls usually do," he said flatly.

"That's always the case with you, huh?" Tracey asked, frowning at the flat tone that his friend had adopted.

"It always seems to be the case… The people who are interested in you are the people you couldn't care less about, and the people you're interested in aren't interested in you."

Tracey had the distinct feeling that Gary was referring to the boat ride to the Orange Islands, when he had left Gary to be with a flirtatious gay friend. Rather than deepening his frown and acknowledging what Gary was talking about, he smiled. "And sometimes people you like _are_ interested but you're too busy focusing on the people that you're not interested in to even notice."

This time Gary frowned and an unreadable expression came over his face. Tracey wasn't sure if he was angry or not. Before he could find out, a nearby intercom announced that boarding for the ferry would start shortly.

"I need to go say good bye to my family," Tracey sighed. "I want to hear all about your Sharpedo experiences when I get on that boat!" He said to Gary with a forced smile.

Gary smiled in return but it looked just as forced as Tracey's felt. The brunette wandered off without another word and Tracey ran a hand through his hair in frustration. He couldn't help but remember why he had come home in the first place.

By the time Tracey eventually made it onto the boat Gary had completely disappeared from the side of the boat where he had been. It took him awhile to track down the teenager but he found him near the front of the boat, laying down on one of the benches, using his backpack as a pillow. Tracey shook his head and sat down next to him.

"Lazy," he teased.

"You have no idea how tired I am," Gary muttered, not even opening his eyes.

Tracey smiled. "I'm sure I have an idea," he replied. "Field work is very physical, that's tiring on its own. I can't imagine doing it for three weeks straight."

"Add in the scuba diving and data analysis…"

Tracey glanced down at him and continued to smile. Despite his exhaustion, Gary was as attractive as ever and Tracey was happy just to see him. When he was relaxed with his eyes closed, Tracey had to admit that he was rather cute.

Without really thinking, Tracey reached out and touched Gary's hair, musing it slightly. Gary sighed softly in response. "That feels good," he murmured. At the sound of his voice, Tracey realized what he was doing and quickly withdrew his hand with a nervous laugh. Gary opened his eyes and tilted his head back to look up at Tracey. "You know, I would love you so much if you kept doing that."

Tracey laughed. "Then people would think we're gay," he pointed out.

"I thought we were?"

"They would think we're dating." Not that Tracey had a problem with that particular notion, but he knew Gary would fret over other people seeing him as gay. Having expected the boy to sit up and scoot a safe distance away, he was surprised when Gary laughed and stayed put.

"Not like anyone on this boat knows us, so who cares what they think?"

Tracey was quiet for a moment. "You would feel differently if we were in Pallet."

"Everyone knows us in Pallet."

"You don't care what people think if they don't know you?"

"It doesn't matter what they think if they don't know you."

"But it does if they do?"

Gary groaned and closed his eyes again. When he opened them, he leaned his head back to look at Tracey once more. "I think it's safe to say you've killed the mood, Trace."

Tracey laughed and ran his fingers through Gary's hair again. "I wasn't aware that we were trying to create a mood," he replied as Gary sighed softly.

"Please keep doing that."

"What's in it for me?" Tracey teased.

Gary frowned slightly for a moment before responding. "An apology," he finally said.

Surprised and a bit confused, Tracey froze for a moment. "For what?"

"For the way I acted earlier. I'm just really exhausted; you know how I am when I'm tired."

"Yeah," Tracey agreed without thinking, "You can be an ass when you're really tired."

Gary glanced back up at Tracey in surprise and frowned again. "I really must be if even you're saying that."

Tracey was silent for a moment before replying again. "I'm sorry," he apologized quietly. "I know you always have a lot on your mind, it's not fair to judge the way you act because you don't act like yourself when you're stressed, whether you're tired or not."

"You don't have to apologize. You're always so nice to everyone; it's actually kind of refreshing to hear you insult me for once."

Tracey couldn't help but laugh at the response. "You are so weird," he said good-naturedly. "Though I guess that's what makes you so interesting," he added as an afterthought.

"Interesting, huh?" Gary asked, curious. "How so?"

"Well, you're kind of unique, you know. Your interests are really diverse and you don't fit any stereotypical images for anything."

"And everyone else fits stereotypical images?"

Tracey frowned, realizing how his words could be taken. "Stereotypes exist for a reason," he said slowly. "Some people fit them, whether it's because they genuinely are like that or because they think that's how they should be. It's one thing if someone actually are like that, but I hate it when people think they have to been something that they're not. I just prefer it when people act like themselves, in general," Tracey finished lamely, giving up on his explanation.

Gary smiled at the response and nodded, leaving Tracey feeling as though he had passed some sort of test. He felt simultaneously happy and confused at this, but his feeling of elation disappeared when Gary spoke next. "And where does your boyfriend fall in all of this? Does he follow stereotypes because he thinks he should, or is he actually that way?" he asked thoughtfully. "Either way, I have to question you. If he is that because he just is, then you have a completely different type than I thought and you're attracted to people who are not smart enough for you. Or, if he just thinks he should be that way, then what you just said doesn't match up."

Tracey paled slightly and narrowed his eyes. He should have known Gary would have brought that up and he realized how right his sister had been during their discussion on the swings at their family's house. "I don't know, Gary," he began slowly. "Because I don't have a boyfriend. I gave it a try; it lasted a week because he wasn't my type and because it wasn't serious in the first place. I don't owe you more of an explanation than that." He paused with a frown, eyes still narrowed, wondering if he dared to say the rest of what was on his mind. _The hell with it, _he thought. "Maybe the thing you should be questioning is why you care so much about what my type is and how intelligent the people I date are."

At this, Gary sat up quickly. Tracey recognized the signs of anger in his friend: Gary's eyes had lightened a touch and Tracey could see the flecks of gold and green that made his eyes so attractive, as well as the slight flush that had adorably darkened his cheeks. He had to force himself not to smile at Gary's annoyance and he found that his own anger had left him. It was difficult to remain angry with him for longer than a moment or so.

"I didn't take you as the type to mess around with relationships that aren't serious," Gary said softly, in a tone that Tracey couldn't quite place. The tone wasn't accusatory, nor was it particularly angry. If anything, Gary seemed confused, perhaps even a bit hurt.

The latter emotion was what confused and startled Tracey. "I'm not," he admitted quietly. "I don't know what I expected or wanted. I made a mistake and I ended up messing up a childhood friendship."

Gary sighed and gazed off into the distance at the water. "I know all about that," he said quietly. It took Tracey a moment before he realized that Gary was talking about Ash. The trainer had come up in conversation only a few times but Tracey had the feeling that Gary regretted what had become of their friendship. He didn't know what to say in response, so he stayed quiet. They were both quiet for a few moments, and Tracey wished Gary would say something to break the uncomfortable silence. Finally, Gary dropped his gaze to his lap. "You could do a lot better, you know," he said so softly that Tracey wasn't entirely sure he hadn't imagined it.

The words had been so quiet and even timid that Tracey didn't know what to make of them for a minute. The tone had clashed so strongly with Gary's normal personality that it was hard to believe he had spoken in the first place. It was undoubtable that there had been at least a small amount of hurt in the tone and Tracey had a question on the tip of his tongue that he was dying to ask. "Are you… Never mind," he lost his nerve and backed off quickly.

Gary glanced over at him curiously. "No, go ahead."

"Are you jealous?" He wasn't sure what he expected as an answer. Silence, annoyance, and denial he could have, and would have, predicted, so he was understandably confused by Gary's sudden laugh.

Despite his laughter, Gary looked confused as well, almost as confused as his friend. He seemed to contemplate his answer as he laughed, as though he were laughing just to buy himself more time to come up with an answer. After a moment, he glanced back at Tracey, still chuckling and asked, "what, are you psychic?"

Surprised by the response, Tracey couldn't help but smile. The question might as well have been a confirmation. "Is that a yes?" he asked, nudging Gary lightly in the ribs.

To his surprise, Gary covered his face with his hands for a moment, shaking his head slightly, before uttering a sigh that was half laugh. "Yeah," he finally admitted. "I guess that's a yes."

Tracey was taken aback for a moment but he grinned when that moment passed. "Wow. I can't believe you admitted that. You never admit stuff like that."

"Yeah, there's a reason behind that. Let's change the subject now: sorry for being a pain in the ass again, how was your trip?"

"You're an excellent subject changer, you know," Tracey laughed, he smiled when Gary rolled his eyes and gave a small laugh as well. "It was good. A little dramatic at the beginning with everyone on my case but… I _really_ missed them." He noticed Gary seemed to be about to say something but changed his mind, looking everywhere but at Tracey. Tracey remembered suddenly that Gary and May lived with their grandfather rather than their parents; he made a mental note to ask the professor about it one day.

He was about to resume talking when Gary turned back to him with a forced smile. "So, three siblings?" Tracey nodded. "That explains how you can put up with me and May all the time. Are you the oldest?"

"Technically, my sister Tara is, but it's only a twelve minute age difference."

"You guys are twins?" Gary tilted his head slightly, as he usually did when he was curious about something, and Tracey nodded in response with a small smile. He enjoyed talking about his family, but Gary was also incredibly adorable when he did that particular head tilt. "I didn't know you had a twin sister…" He grinned suddenly, his voice taking on a teasing quality while his eyes lit up mischievously. "What else don't I know about you?"

Considering how they had become such good friends in the course of the past year, Tracey couldn't think of anything off the top of his head to tell the other boy, so he shrugged and grinned. "For me to know and you to find out," he teased.

Gary laughed at the response; it was unusual for Tracey to be this flirtatious and he couldn't resist reveling in the moment. It had been a long three weeks since he had last seen his friend and it had been even longer since they had last been this carefree with each other. He had missed just hanging out with Tracey, their conversations occasionally taking on a playful and flirty edge while still capable of being serious and open. When his laughter faded, he frowned slightly, biting his lip as he wondered how open he dared to be just now. "You know, Tracey," he began after some hesitation. When he knew he had Tracey's exclusive attention, he continued. "Even though I really had a good time on the trip, there were some really… rough spots that weren't exactly easy to deal with. I actually missed you a lot. Talking to you and stuff… It really helps with everything going on. I don't think I've given you enough credit for everything that you do for me."

The words took a minute to sink in, but when they did, Tracey smiled softly. "Thanks, Gary," he said quietly.

Gary smiled faintly and shrugged, moving to lay back down on the bench. "It's true," he replied simply, closing his eyes as he rested his head against his backpack again. He couldn't help but smile a bit more when he heard Tracey chuckle softly and felt his long fingers muse his hair again.

"You should get some sleep, you've had a busy few weeks," Tracey suggested softly. He mused Gary's hair one more time before starting to retract his hand from the other boy. As he moved his hand, Gary suddenly reached back and caught it. Tracey froze at the unexpected contact; it sent a small jolt of pleasure through him and left his skin tingling slightly when Gary left go.

"May used to do that to help me sleep when I was younger," Gary explained, tilting his head back so that he could meet Tracey's eyes.

"But you sleep like the dead."

"These days, maybe." When Tracey didn't reply or move, Gary reached back, took his hand again, and moved it back to his hair. "Please? It feels good."

Tracey chuckled again and shook his head. "You're so whiney," he teased. He ran his fingers through Gary's hair, laughing as the other boy groaned softly. "You're pathetic," he teased again. "And you're going to owe me when we get back to Pallet."

"I don't mind," Gary mumbled, eyes closed and suddenly sounding more tired than ever.

"Get some sleep, will you? We can talk when you're not ready to pass out on me."

A tiny smile just barely curved Gary's lips. "Just don't spend the whole trip sketching," he said quietly.

Tracey merely smiled and kept running his fingers through Gary's hair, watching contentedly as the younger teen drifted off to sleep within a few short minutes. Despite what Gary had said about the sketching, Tracey pulled his sketchbook out as soon as the other boy had fallen asleep. He spent a long while sketching the horizon around the boat, as well as the boat deck, before turning his attention back to Gary. By the time he had his fill of sketching his sleeping friend, the sun was beginning to set and a glance at his watch revealed that he had been leisurely sketching for the last three hours. It felt good to sit back and take his time to sketch whatever he felt like sketching. He was usually able to find time to do at least one lazy sketch a day in Pallet, though he sometimes had to go out of his way to find the time. At his family's house on Sunburst Island, it had been nearly impossible to do so; there was always someone around. Whether it was a sibling or one of his parents, someone was always chatting or peering over his shoulder, or bickering in the background, as had always been the case.

Glancing down at Gary, he had to smile. Gary was the one person who would leave him alone when he was sketching, even if the boy was awake. Even if Gary was bored out of his mind, he would either quietly watch him sketch or do something else to quietly amuse himself. It was something Tracey truly appreciated and he doubted Gary realized how much it meant to him to have that quiet support. Gratitude welled up in him and he felt a crazy urge to kiss Gary. It wasn't a sexual feeling in the slightest; it was largely innocent, he simply knew no way to express that gratitude to his friend. The small impulsive corner of his mind brought up the kiss entirely without conscious input from his brain.

Cautiously, he returned his fingers to Gary's hair, luxuriating in the feel of the dark strands against his hand. Frequent exposure to the salty ocean water had dried his hair slightly but left it soft at the same time and Tracey loved running his fingers through it. He flexed his fingers slightly, just barely tugging at the strands, carefully testing how deeply asleep Gary was. Gary just barely stirred at the movement, giving no indication of waking; Tracey sighed quietly at the reaction. The urge to kiss him had disappeared when he realized just how tired Gary was.

He stood and wandered over to the side of the boat. He wasn't sure what exactly had come over him to even consider kissing him in the first place. With another sigh, Tracey rested his chin in his hand and gazed out at the water. The water was flat, surprisingly calm, and it reminded him of the little cove near his family's house. He tried to force the thoughts of Gary out of his head as he focused on the movement of the boat through the water. He leaned over the railing, searching for marine creatures as he took a deep breath of the ocean air. The action was soothing and it calmed Tracey's mind enough for him to relax and enjoy the salty breeze that followed the ferry on its trip to Pallet.

… … …

It was night time and had been dark for at least an hour when Gary woke up to a rough tongue slobbering over his cheek. His eyes snapped open to find a furry black face with brilliant crimson eyes an inch from his own. Umbreon was standing over him, wagging happily enough for him to wonder what the hell was going on. Gary groaned and sat up, absently patting the dark pokemon's head.

"Welcome back to the land of the living," Tracey's voice spoke up from nearby. "You realize you've been asleep for almost five hours, right?"

"That explains why it's dark," Gary yawned, looking over at his friend. "Is there a reason she's so happy?" he asked, gesturing to the wagging canine.

Tracey nodded and gestured towards the side of the boat, where they could see that the boat was rapidly approaching a set of lights. "We'll be docking at Pallet in about fifteen minutes. Plus she was trying to wake you up for a few minutes before jumping up on the bench, and she saw me get you this from the machine," he held up a bottle of Mountain Dew, "So she probably wants you to play with her."

Gary smiled and thanked him while Umbreon jumped down from the bench. "Happy to be going back home, 'Bre?" She responded by licking his face. "I'm too tired, you know that," he muttered as he took a sip from the soda Tracey had gotten him. "You know I'm going to need a gallon of this to feel awake."

"You would have a heart attack from all that caffeine," Tracey replied. He retrieved his sketchbook from the bench and flipped it open only to find that he had drawn on the page of the book. He groaned and snapped it shut. "We'll be home soon enough. You don't need to be awake for that long."

"That's good, because I intend on passing out as soon as we get there."

"You might want to wait until you get to your bed before doing that." Tracey glanced over at Gary and gave him a small smile that he was happy to see returned easily. Despite the rocky start they'd had to the trip, he was having a nice time with the younger boy. It was refreshing to see him smiling easily and being in a good mood. He had to admit that he'd missed his friend.

Gary seemed to be more awake by the time the ferry docked at the tiny harbor just south of Pallet. As they were gathering their belongings to leave the boat, Tracey teasingly reminded Gary that he had said that he would owe him when they got back to Pallet. Gary smiled at the comment. "Technically, we're not in Pallet," he said. "But you're right. I still owe you for getting past that pain in the ass part of Resident Evil."

Remembering what he was talking about didn't require a single thought for Tracey. He remembered all too easily the playful wrestling as Gary tried to get the video game controller back from him. _"A kiss,"_ was what Tracey had said when Gary asked what he owed him then. And he, surprisingly, would have gotten it if Gary's friend Wyatt hadn't made his irritable entrance when he had.

"I remember," Tracey admitted quietly. He wondered where Gary was going with this. Suddenly he realized how close they had been as they were gathering their bags.

Gary grinned mischievously and moved forward, pressing a quick kiss against his cheek. "That's for the game, and this is for today," he said and kissed Tracey's other cheek. The other boy froze, surprised by the action. Gary laughed at Tracey's baffled expression and shook his head. "Come on, Trace; let's get out of here." With that, he hoisted his duffle bag onto his shoulder and grasped Tracey's wrist, leading him towards the opposite side of the boats they could leave.

Tracey came to his senses just in time to grab his last bag as he followed Gary. Umbreon trailed along behind them and though she was clearly still happy, her intelligent eyes held a confusion that Tracey could certainly relate to. He wasn't sure what to make of the two kisses. He couldn't tell if Gary was just playing around, going along with what had been a semi-serious joke over a month earlier, or if he was being serious.

As they came around to the platform leading to the dock, the gentle pressure on Tracey's wrist left and he realized that Gary's hand had been there the whole time. Tracy blushed at the realization and bit his lip to keep from grinning like a fool. Playing around or not, Gary had just taken things to a new level. It was that realization that simultaneously made Tracey ecstatic and scared. Friendships were fragile and too many things could go wrong; still, a little patience could go a long way and, for once, Tracey allowed a glimmer of hope to flow through him.

Gary stepped onto the dock, only to be pounced on by May, who had been waiting excitedly for them. _Maybe there's a chance,_ Tracey thought to himself as he watched Gary return his sister's hug happily instead of irritably shrugging her off.

Maybe things weren't as hopeless or confusing as either boy worried.

… … …


	15. Chapter 14

**Secrets Kept**

I know it's been a long time since I've updated and I've gotten quite a few reviews in that time, so thank you to everyone who has reviewed!

One thing I've noticed in a handful of reviews/messages is concern (for lack of a better word) over the stereotypes of gays… One of the reasons why I wrote Gary and Tracey as they are in this story arc is to show that those stereotypes are not necessarily accurate. Yes, I do refer to the cliché feminine gays, but that is largely because that is the way so much of society views that sub-culture and that is the predominant image you end up seeing most often in the media and on tv, YouTube, wherever. I've tried to depict Gary as struggling with the fact that he is not that person, and that this stereotype does not define him as a person, regardless of his sexual preference. Not every member of the LGBT community will go through this struggle and Tracey is a good example of that. I wanted to show that a gay guy could like heavy metal and video games and could be intelligent, adventurous, and a typical guy, like Gary is – or that he could be a quiet artist who is smart and kind but still a totally normal person and sibling, like Tracey. I wanted to show how hard it is to come out of the closet to the people close to you and how scary those feelings can be when you're still a teenager.

Now, without further ado…

Chapter 14

"_Maybe I just want to kiss you." _

"_That's for the game…"_

"_A kiss."_

"… _And this is for today."_

The various scenes swirled about Gary's mind, mingling with the feelings of his lips against Tracey's cheek and his fingers wrapped around Tracey's wrist. Though he had, true to his word, slipped off to his bedroom and promptly passed out at the first opportunity, the near kiss between him and Tracey and his own actions from the ferry kept running through his head. The end result was a jumbled mess of dreams as Gary's brain struggled to make sense of it all.

It was just as he was reaching a semblance of sense that an additional weight on the bed roused him from sleep. Still mostly asleep, he figured it to be one of his canine pokemon and he irritably pushed at the disturbance. When his hand brushed against flesh instead of fur, he immediately woke more completely.

A short, familiar laugh sounded from the edge of the bed. "You're not getting rid of me that easily," spoke up a bored-sounding voice. Beneath the layer of boredom and mild annoyance, Gary could easily recognize the cheerfulness in his best friend's voice.

Despite the small smile that formed at the sound of his voice, Gary buried his face in one of the pillows on his bed and groaned. "Can't I sleep in?" he whined.

Darren snickered and stretched out, folding his arms behind his head and lazily closing his eyes. "It's three-thirty," he pointed out calmly. He grinned when Gary groaned loudly once again. "Your grandpa told me to check that you were still breathing."

"He would," Gary muttered into the pillow.

"And May's been whining about you sleeping; she misses her baby brother," Darren teased. He rolled his eyes when Gary gave no response. "You missed out on all the fun this morning at the beach. There were some Lapras passing by and a pod of dolphins hunting around us. It was pretty cool."

"I'm surprised you're not still there."

"Yeah, well, I didn't exactly feel like watching Wyatt shove his tongue down my sister's throat."

Gary looked up at him in surprise. "What's going on with Wyatt and Amanda?"

"They started dating and now they keep making out everywhere. It's annoying; I can't believe he would date my sister. It's not right, you know?"

"I hate to break it to you, Dare, but Wyatt's not the only one who's done anything with your sister."

Darren rolled his eyes and shoved his elbow into Gary's ribs. "You were drunk, Wyatt had egged you on, and you were trying to piss off May – Amanda had nothing to do with you kissing her. Wyatt – "

"Is always drunk and I doubt his main goal is to piss people off with Amanda," Gary interrupted. "He wants attention and he wants to feel good. Amanda's giving him that and she doesn't exactly seem to mind… If you're going to be so harsh on him, then you should be pissed off at me too. And how the hell did you know I was trying to piss off May?"

Another eye roll. "I think you underestimate how well I know you. I bet I know plenty of things about you that you don't know I know."

Uncomfortable with the direction of the conversation, Gary finally climbed out of bed. "Yeah, well, keep it to yourself, will you?" he said, carefully keeping his tone light as he gathered clothes from around the room. "The last thing I need is to worry about you telling everyone all of my secrets."

Darren gave a small smirk, reminiscent of one of Gary's, as he sat up. "Oh, don't worry. I won't tell anyone about your secret relationship with Tracey."

Despite the voice in the corner of his mind that reasoned it was only a joke, Gary froze before spinning to glower at his friend, who merely grinned mischievously. "Shut up, Darren!"

"You know I was kidding," the other boy called as Gary stalked out of the room. "Defensive," he muttered once Gary was out of the room. He frowned after a moment, remembering how many times Gary had been defensive over little things in the past year - in conversations of girls, and girlfriends, and sex, and how many other little things in general?

The joke must have hit close to home. May had flat out said months earlier that she thought her brother was gay. Granted, May tended to come up with crazy ideas, so he wouldn't be remotely surprised if she was totally off with this. That said, it also wouldn't surprise him if it were true.

He waited a few minutes before getting up from the bed and wandering down the hallway to the bathroom. The door opened as soon as he tapped on it. "You know I was just messing with you," he pointed out, leaning lazily against the door.

Gary shook his head slightly and tugged on a t-shirt that had been sitting on the counter. He had clearly just gotten out of the shower a moment or two earlier. "I know," he replied.

"I know you know that, so do you think you could stop biting my head off for it?"

Gary suppressed a grin at the annoyance in his voice. "Sorry. I'm just tired." He slipped past Darren in the doorway to head towards the stairs and the other boy followed him. As they headed down the stairs, Tracey rounded a corner downstairs, noticed Gary, and started up the stairs to meet them halfway.

"Your grandfather was looking for you," Tracey said, smiling as he stopped a few steps below Gary. "I think he wants to hear about everything you did with Professor Birch and Professor Ivy."

Unable to help it, Gary smiled at the sight of Tracey. Maybe it was because he hadn't seen the other boy in so long, but it was nice just hearing Tracey's voice and seeing him in person. "Is he in the lab?"

Tracey leaned against the stair railing, still smiling. "Where else would he be?"

"I guess he does basically live in there," Gary replied. Tracey laughed in return and Gary was suddenly reminded of how attractive he was. He grinned at the sound of Tracey's laugh and unconsciously stepped closer to the older teen.

"The easiest way to get him to leave is to tell him that Mrs. Ketchum is on her way over."

"He has it bad for her." Tracey laughed at the response once again and Gary couldn't help it as his eyes roamed over him. He was attractive in general, but he was incredibly cute when he laughed.

Darren cleared his throat from a few steps above Gary and he was suddenly conscious of how close he and Tracey were. Tracey seemed to notice Gary's discomfort and blushed slightly, running a hand through his hair.

"I guess I should let you go downstairs to see what he wants."

"Yeah," Gary said softly, avoiding Tracey's eyes and avoiding looking back at Darren.

Tracey continued up the stairs and Gary quickly made his way down to the first floor, still avoiding looking at his best friend, who was trailing behind him. They headed down the hallway towards the lab and were nearly there when Gary realized that he could no longer hear Darren's footsteps behind him. He turned around to find him further down the hall, frowning slightly as though he were deep in thought.

"What?" Gary sighed, hoping that he hadn't given anything away in his short conversation with Tracey.

"You've been acting different since you moved home. What's going on?"

Gary sighed again, turning back in the direction of the lab door. "Darren, everyone is acting different; it's called growing up, everyone does it."

"I know that," Darren said slowly. "But you've been acting totally different, personality-wise. You're practically my brother, I know you and you haven't been yourself since you moved home. What's the deal?"

Gary bit his lip, wondering how to respond. There was no way he could lie to him - Darren would be able to tell and after all of the shit he had dealt with when it came to Gary over the last year, he certainly didn't deserve to be lied to.

"It's hard," he began after a pause, turning around. "When you're used to working in a real research lab, not just Grandpa's lab, a real lab where you're one of the supervising researchers, and you have to leave that because it's a requirement that you leave that to go to high school so that you can go to college, because apparently being smart enough to use your brain isn't enough. I didn't want to move home, Darren: I liked what I was doing, and I was respected for it. I didn't have to fight for respect like I did in the Orange Islands, I wasn't wasting my time having to do English homework or memorize the periodic table or any of the other bullshit we have to do at school. On top of that, there's always some sort of drama going on with someone and I'm just so sick of everyone always going on about pointless crap. I'm trying to get everything to work and it always seems like Tracey's the only person that gets me. Good enough response for you?"

Darren seemed to consider what he had said for a minute before nodding. "You know you can tell me anything, right?" He asked suddenly.

Gary turned back around and closed the distance to the lab door. "I know," he said flatly, opening the door and stepping into the lab.

"Took you long enough," a feminine voice called as soon as the door opened. "Did you catch up on your beauty sleep, brat?"

"May, leave your brother alone," the professor's mild voice drifted from his office.

Gary rolled his eyes at May and walked deeper into the lab, heading towards his grandfather's office. "Hey, Grandpa," he greeted tiredly. "You wanted to see me?"

"Ah, Gary. Yes. I spoke to Professor Ivy this morning. She was quite impressed with you."

Having already known that the female professor had been impressed with him, Gary had to resist rolling his eyes. "Oh," he said simply, wondering where his grandfather was going with this.

"It was nice to hear, all things considered. With all of the skipping classes and fighting with your friends this past year, I was a little worried that you might end up embarrassing-"

"If you're going to lecture me nonstop, then I'm going to renew my Trainer license and go to Unova," Gary interrupted flatly.

Much to his surprise, his grandfather smiled at the interruption, though his eyes did show a touch of annoyance. "That's an empty threat," he replied calmly. Gary crossed his arms across his chest and met the professor's gaze evenly as if to challenge his words. "If you wanted to go back to training, you would have done so already. Now then, speaking of Unova, there is a conference in Castelia City in a few weeks. I'll be gone for two weeks and during that time-"

"I know, Tracey and May are in charge, so I need to do whatever they say."

"Actually, no. There's going to be a bit of a change. I've already spoke to May and Tracey about it, that's why I sent Darren to drag you out of bed."

"Change? But Tracey's your head assistant and May's always been in charge of the business side when you go away. What is there to change?"

"Tracey is in charge of general lab work, excluding necropsy work. He also oversees general pokemon care, excluding water, ice, fire, and psychic pokemon."

Gary frowned at the exceptions his grandfather had named. Tracey was usually left in charge of overseeing all of the pokemon while Gary helped him whenever he needed the help – he had no problem with this arrangement, especially considering that Tracey was exceptionally good at working with the pokemon and overseeing it all. Having someone else oversee even one of the types of pokemon was a big deal, especially when it came to the four types his grandfather had just named off. The fire and psychic types could be downright dangerous to work with – it took a special type of trainer to work with them and the professor was very particular with how they were handled. The water and ice types required special care purely because of their aquatic habitat. Maintaining the man-made lake, streams, ponds on the property involved constant testing and treating of the water, and the biweekly cleaning of them required snorkeling in the streams and ponds and full scuba gear for the large lake. It was tiresome work and Wyatt usually helped with it, when he wasn't too hung over and they weren't in the middle of a fight. It was not the sort of thing he would exactly trust his sister with.

"You're not leaving May in charge of those are you?" he couldn't help but ask.

"Heavens no! I'm leaving you in charge of those."

Startled by the revelation, Gary frowned, blinking at his grandfather. "Can you repeat that?"

The professor smiled again. "You're in charge of any necropsy that comes up while I'm gone, which you already oversee, and I'm leaving you in charge of the water, ice, fire, and psychic pokemon," he rephrased, still smiling. "May has some grants to work on and she's helping Tracey with the smaller pokemon, like she prefers to do."

"You're leaving me in charge of the four hardest types of pokemon to manage?"

This time the professor frowned. "Well, when you put it that way, it does seem like a lot of work-"

Gary shook his head slightly. "That's not what I meant," he said softly, still trying to wrap his head around what the responsibility his grandfather was giving him. "It's just that it's a big deal. I'm surprised you would leave me in charge of that."

Professor Oak nodded faintly, now understanding where his grandson was coming from. "Well, despite all of the troubles we've had in the past few months you've shown your worth and I've think you've earned it. So do Tracey and May."

"Thanks, Grandpa," Gary said softly.

"As I said, you've earned it… Though I do hope that this will help prevent us from seeing those same issues again this school year." Gary closed his eyes and suppressed a groan; he was not looking forward to going back to school. "Especially the skipping class," the professor continued. "I know you're bored but messing around and skipping school won't make it any easier." Gary gazed out the window, pointedly avoiding looking at his grandfather and hoping that the older man would take the hint and stop talking. "Gary?"

He rolled his eyes slightly but returned his gaze to his grandfather with a small sigh. "Got it," he replied flatly. "I'll be good."

"Good," the professor walked to the office door and opened it, holding it open for the teenager. "Go hang out with your friends, you haven't seen them in a while. And _stay out of trouble_!"

"I haven't even been back for twenty-four hours yet! How much trouble do you think I can get into?" Gary asked in exasperation, though smiling slightly, amused by his grandfather.

"I know you better than that."

"I know you do," Gary replied simply, heading over to where Darren and Tracey had joined May at one of the lab benches.

His sister grinned at him and waited until their grandfather had retreated back into his office before speaking. "I think this new promotion of yours calls for a celebration," she said impishly.

Tracey frowned but said nothing while Darren grinned at May. "We could use a good party," he agreed, looking over at Gary for his agreement as well.

To his surprise, Gary shook his head. "It's a lot of responsibility," he said slowly, meeting Tracey's eyes across the lab bench. The older boy nodded in agreement. "I don't know that having a party would be the best idea."

"I'm not getting involved any more than to say that I don't think it's a good idea to do that here," Tracey spoke up. "This is a lot of work and you know I'll help you if you need it, but I'm not responsible for those pokemon anymore. I won't take the blame for you if you mess up because you decided to get drunk with your friends."

"Party pooper," May pouted. Gary and Tracey both ignored her.

Thinking back to the epiphany he'd had in the Orange Islands after speaking to his grandfather on the phone that one stormy day, Gary knew getting trashed with his friends would not be the wisest move. It wasn't healthy, mentally or physically, to keep doing that. "This isn't something I want to screw up on," he said, looking from his sister to Darren. "I'm going to side with Tracey on this one."

Though Gary's decision didn't bother him much, Darren playfully mimicked May's pout. "You're supposed to side with me, I'm your best friend!" he joked.

Gary shrugged, smirking at him. "Maybe I'm replacing you with Tracey."

… … …


	16. Chapter 15

**Secrets Kept**

Two chapters at once? Why not! Let's get this story rolling a little faster!

Chapter 15

A piercing series of beeps shattered the silence of the bedroom, rousing Gary from his sleep with a groan. It felt as though he had just laid down an hour earlier. A glance at the beeping alarm clock showed that he wasn't too far off; he had been hanging out with friends until nearly two in the morning before realizing the time and hurrying home. It was now five in the morning and it was his turn to get up early and feed breakfast to all of the pokemon. His grandfather usually did this every day but with him in Unova for two weeks, it was up to Gary and Tracey to do it.

Despite usually being able to function on only a few short hours of sleep, Gary had the distinct feeling he was going to be fairly useless today.

He somehow managed to drag himself out of bed and made it down the stairs without exhaustedly tumbling down them. It took nearly three hours but he eventually made it through the arduous task of feeding breakfast to every critter on the ranch. Hungry and more exhausted than ever, he finally started heading back toward the lab.

Umbreon suddenly darted out of the lab door, followed by Marill and Venonat as he approached the back door to the lab. Tracey stepped outside after them, leaning against the wall with a cup of coffee and a grin as he watched Gary. The canine ran straight to her trainer and rubbed her head against his leg affectionately before taking off across the yard, Marill happily bouncing after her. Venonat followed them, undoubtedly to play at the edge of the lake.

"You look like hell," Tracey commented when Gary reached him. "Maybe you should try going to bed earlier," he teased.

"Bite me," Gary replied, fighting back a yawn.

"There's nothing I'd rather do first thing in the morning than sink my teeth into you," Tracey replied, rolling his eyes. "Too bad I'm being responsible and doing my work."

"Hey, I'm being responsible!"

Tracey smiled and turned to head back inside. "That explains why you came home at quarter to two when you had to get up at five."

Gary rolled his eyes and followed him into the lab, leaving the door open for the pokemon to return when they were done playing. "Come on, Trace, stop being a nag. I'm starting to feel like you're my girlfriend. It's getting confusing."

"And I'm starting to feel like you're my little sister. It's even more confusing," Tracey replied, shooting a grin at his sleepy friend. "Go sleep, I'll be good in here for a while."

"Thanks, Trace," Gary yawned. "Let me know when it's time to give the pokemon lunch. I need to test the ponds for amoebas and clear out the algae bloom in the lake."

Tracey nodded, giving a small wave of acknowledgement as he sat down at his computer to begin his work for the day.

Rather than going upstairs to his bedroom, Gary headed towards the living room after grabbing some breakfast. He flopped lazily on the couch and flipped on the television and DVD player, hoping that the movie May had been watching with Tracey when he left the night before was still in. Sure enough, the menu came on the screen and Gary closed his eyes as the movie started, falling asleep before the opening scene was over.

He woke up a couple of hours later, near the climax of the movie, when Tracey leaned over the back of the couch and shook his shoulder. Tracey smiled apologetically at him as he groaned and glanced at the clock, whining about the time.

"As much as I would like to watch The Avengers with you, I could use some help prepping the food in the lab," Tracey said softly, folding his arms on the back of the couch and watching the movie.

"I haven't even gotten to check out Thor yet," Gary complained. He looked up at Tracey with a petulant smile.

Tracey laughed and shook his head. "Josh dressed up as Thor for Halloween, it was pretty funny," he said, thinking back to his trip home several months prior. It had been fun helping his brother and sisters with their costumes.

"Fitting," Gary murmured. "He's cute enough."

"No hitting on my little brother. And how exhausted _are_ you to be saying that?"

"Extremely."

Tracey laughed again and walked around the couch to sit down next to Gary, who only moved his legs out of Tracey's way when the older boy crossed his arms over his chest with an even stare. The two boys watched the remainder of the movie together, Gary periodically dozing off for a moment or two, only to be woken up by Tracey either shoving his leg or lightly punching his shoulder.

"Why?" Gary groaned after a particularly hard punch.

Tracey grinned. "Why didn't you go to bed earlier?" He teased, earning a sharp kick to the thigh in retaliation. "Be nice," he warned, laughing a bit. "I'll tell the professor you were mean to me."

"_You_ be nice," Gary retorted sleepily.

"I _am_ being nice. I could be dragging you to the lab to help me prep the food."

Gary narrowed his eyes and nudged Tracey in the ribs with his foot, determined to get in the last word, whether it was verbal or not. He frowned slightly as he returned his attention to the television. May had been helping Tracey prep the pokemon food in the lab lately. Although she wouldn't touch any of the meat for the carnivores, her efforts in measuring out kibble into bowls, chopping fruits and vegetables, and arranging food bowls by group helped tremendously and cut down on a great deal of work. If Tracey needed his help, that meant May was not currently helping. Now that he thought about it, the house seemed rather quiet and he had to wonder where his sister was.

"She went out with Amanda," Tracey said with a small frown when Gary asked where she was.

Sensing something was off, Gary finally sat up to look at his friend properly. "Where'd they go?"

"Johto."

Gary frowned, confused by the response. "Why?"

Tracey sighed and rested his head back against the back of the couch. "Legal drinking age in Johto is eighteen," he reminded the boy with his eyes closed.

Gary rolled his eyes and groaned loudly. "Damn... I told her not to throw a party while Gramps was gone."

"So did I."

Sighing as he realized there was nothing he could really do about his troublesome sister, Gary stood. "How about we go take care of the food so we can get everything done and over with?"

"Sounds good to me."

The two boys prepped the relatively small lunch meal for the pokemon and brought it out to them, picking up the food bowls from breakfast as they went. The used bowls replaced the fresh bowls of food in a wagon pulled by Gary's Arcanine. Once they were done, they went their separate ways, Tracey bringing the dirty breakfast bowls back to the lab for cleaning while Gary headed out to the various ponds on the property to collect water samples. After a quick check under the microscopes proved the water to be free of amoebas, he was back outside, this time with his mask and snorkel to clear a bloom of algae in the lake. Before he could do that though, Tracey stopped him, apparently needing some help in the stable for the ponyta and rapidash. Though the fire types were now Gary's responsibility, Tracey still did a lot of work in the stables - the horses loved him and the stable was one of his favorite places to work. Usually, they split the work but on days that Gary had to do extra work with the water, Tracey took over.

Of course, helping Tracey groom the ponyta and rapidash took a long time, but it wasn't something Gary minded. In fact, he was quite content brushing to be doing something so simple with Tracey. It was an easy chore, if the horses liked the person doing it, and it was almost relaxing. The occasional comments and snippets of conversation between them made it all the more enjoyable, even with the particularly mischievous young ponyta that had taken a liking to nudging Gary with her nose every few minutes.

"Knock it off, Pele," he repeated for the third time after she had nearly knocked him over for the sixth or seventh time. She was small, but deceptively strong.

The young horse whinnied happily and nuzzled his shoulder. She nudged him again the second he returned his attention to the rapidash that he was trying to brush. Across the room, Tracey laughed as Gary closed his eyes and shook his head, trying not to laugh as well. "You're very annoying, you know that?" Gary said, continuing to focus on the larger horse on front of him. Pele snorted behind him and Gary knew her well enough to assume that she was flicking her tail in dissent.

"Yes, you _are_. Isn't she, Apollo?" he asked the older rapidash with a smile. The rapidash nodded its head and Gary grinned.

"You do realize that you're arguing with a horse, right?" Tracey asked, leading the horse he had just finished with back to the field to run for a few more hours.

Gary laughed. "It's hard not to when you work with this one," he replied tilting his head in Pele's direction, only to have her nudge his hand, knocking the brush out of it. "Seriously? C'mon, Pele, I've got work to do."

Tracey smiled as he approached Gary, patting Pele on the nose. She was his favorite of all the fire horses at the lab and it amused him greatly to see her bother Gary so much. It was actually rather cute. "She's just trying to tell you that she wants to be taken through the agility course."

"Or you could just take her out for a ride. She's big enough to do that now," Gary suggested, finally finishing brushing the rapidash Apollo.

"Oh," Tracey said simply, shifting his weight and scratching the back of his neck. "I guess you, uh, could do that too."

Gary glanced at him as he led Apollo back to the field. "Have you ever ridden one?"

"No, have you?"

"Growing up in this town?" Gary asked with a roll of his eyes. "Are you kidding me?"

"That's a yes," Tracey sighed as he ran a hand through his hair.

Gary paused near the door to the field and gave him a contemplative look before smirking slightly and heading over towards the storage area that held riding equipment. "Pick a horse. An older rapidash would be good for you: they tend to be more calm. I'll take Pele since she seems to love me _so damn much_," he emphasized the last few words with a playful glare at the ponyta who had followed him into the storage area.

"But I thought you had to take care of the algae in the lake," Tracey said, unsure of whether to be happy to have the chance to do something new with Gary or to feel bad for distracting Gary from his other responsibilities.

The other boy shrugged, frowning as he picked up a few pieces of equipment and tried to remember exactly how they went. "A little algae never hurt anyone. I can do it tomorrow."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course, I'm sure, Tracey. It's just algae; it's not a big deal. Come on, I'll teach you."

Tracey grinned and followed Gary out to the field. He smiled as he looked around at the various ponyta and rapidash milling about before picking one of the older female rapidash. "I have no idea what I'm doing," he warned Gary, who shrugged his shoulders in response.

"It's been a long time since I've done this," Gary replied, frowning again at the riding equipment. Pele came up behind him and nudged him in the back with her snout, causing him to roll his eyes. "Stop, Pele!"

Tracey pulled the young ponyta away from him, patting her snout and snickering a bit as Gary continued to peer at the equipment in confusion. It was somewhat refreshing and amusing to see him, for once, confused over something. "I'm not sure how much I trust you with this," Tracey teased him, earning another eye roll.

"Apollo, help me out here."

The rapidash that Gary had been brushing in the barn came over, nudging the different pieces and pointing with his nose to different places on the other rapidash in order to help the young researcher. Tracey watched, highly amused, as he kept Pele occupied. Finally, after a bit of trial and error, Gary had managed to get the horse that Tracey had picked and Apollo ready for riding. Riding the fire horses had always been one of his favorite parts of childhood but it had been years since he had ridden one and, after realizing that he couldn't remember how to properly prepare the saddle and accompanying straps and buckles, he figured riding Pele wouldn't be the best idea. With how energetic she was, it wouldn't surprise him if she took off running and he wasn't about to humiliate himself that badly in front of Tracey.

Gary grinned up at Apollo when he was done and rubbed the horse's neck. "Thanks, buddy." Apollo snorted and nuzzled Gary's neck with his nose. "Watch the horn," Gary scolded lightly, dodging the long horn coming from Apollo's forehead. "I'd like my eyeballs to stay in my skull, where they belong."

"That would be an interesting call to make to your grandfather," Tracey laughed.

"Could you imagine calling May home from Johto for that?" Gary asked him, still grinning as he made his way over to his friend, leading the rapidash that he had picked out. Tracey pulled away from Pele to approach the larger horse nervously. Gary helped him up on to the horse, grasping Tracey's hand a bit longer than was necessary as he smiled reassuringly. "You'll be fine, Trace," he assured him before walking back to Apollo and hoisting himself up.

After a few minutes of showing Tracey the general ways to hold and maneuver the reins, they set off across the field, Pele happily trotting along after them towards the agility course that was set up in the adjacent field. Once in that field, they left her to her own devices as they rode around the perimeter of the field. Tracey's nervousness gradually faded and they eventually sped up to a slower trot while Pele ran and leapt over hurdles, seeming to have the time of her life.

Watching him relax and enjoy himself gave Gary a strange sort of pleasure that he couldn't quite place. It made him smile to see the older boy doing well at something he had shown him to do and he felt an odd type of pride watching Tracey.

"Told you you'd be fine," Gary said softly as they finally climbed off of the two rapidash.

Tracey smiled almost shyly in response, preoccupying himself with checking the time on his cell phone. "We should start wrapping everything up for the day," he suggested, realizing that they were late in beginning the preparations for the pokemon dinners.

Gary nodded and began busying himself with cleaning up all of the equipment that had been taken out in the stables, telling Tracey that he would be in to help him once he was done. He couldn't help but smile to himself as he returned all of the riding and grooming equipment to its proper place. Having both May and the professor gone for the day meant that he could relax a bit more than usual around Tracey. Most of the time, it had been just him and Tracey in the lab the whole week that the professor had been gone so far, and Gary often found himself with a stupid grin on his face as the two spent time together. Of course, there had been several times in the week that he had caught Tracey with a similar grin. He always seemed to notice when Gary caught him and would blush faintly, biting his lip as he turned away. Gary would laugh softly, shaking his head and trying hard to fight down a stupid grin of his own. With both May and the professor gone for the day, he didn't have to worry about anyone else seeing those smiles.

Finally returning to the lab, he found Tracey there, finishing up with the preparations of the final meal of the day, while talking to Marril and Venonat, who were bouncing around on the counter near him. Umbreon was lying nearby and quickly jumped up to greet him, alerting Tracey to his presence. The other boy smiled when he saw Gary and continued quietly working.

"According to Marril, May's not back yet," he announced once Gary reached the counter and began helping him. "Maybe she decided against having a party here."

Gary sighed quietly, reaching over to pat Venonat on the head. "Don't get your hopes up on that. Knowing her, she probably went to the mall." Marril, to Gary's surprise, squeaked in agreement. The little water mouse usually avoided doing anything that could be seen as agreement with something Gary did or said.

"You're probably right," Tracey replied, though Gary barely paid any attention.

He was more focused on the little blue mouse in front of him, who surprisingly accepted an apple slice that he offered it. Marril squeaked again and tilted his head cutely, begging for more food, which Gary gave him. Still surprised by the way Marril was being friendly to him, Gary reached out and scratched him behind the ears, causing the little critter to nuzzle his hand before chirping happily and bouncing off to play with Venonat some more.

"Why is he being nice to me?"

Tracey barely glanced up. "Marril's usually nice to everyone."

"Not to me," Gary reminded him.

"He has an issue with negativity. You've been in a better mood lately, so he likes you more than he used to."

Unsure of what exactly to say in response, Gary elected to stay quiet. Neither teenager spoke again until they were once again outside with a wagon full of fresh bowls of food.

"Why have you been in such a better mood lately?" Tracey asked suddenly as he traded a mostly-eaten bowl of grass pokemon food for a fresh bowl.

Gary shrugged his shoulders, thinking over his response. As he thought, Arcanine pulled the wagon of dinner to the next area. "I guess I realized that being gay didn't have to be the thing that defined me," he finally said, helping Tracey load up more partially eaten food.

"You realized that not every gay person fits the stereotype?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that," Gary agreed. "I kind of realized that I could still be myself, you know?"

Tracey nodded in agreement as they continued picking up more food bowls. "There's nothing wrong with liking other guys, regardless of what some people think."

"Some people still think it's disgusting."

"Well then, maybe they should stop thinking about it."

Gary laughed softly. "It would be nice if they would."

Tracey glanced over at him, a bit thrown off by the response. "Have you thought about telling your friends?"

"I almost told Darren a few times," Gary admitted, shrugging again. "Sometimes I get the idea that he almost _knows_ already."

"He practically is your brother and he is pretty smart. It's not impossible for him to figure something like that out," Tracey said reasonably.

"Are you trying to say I act gay?" Gary asked, lightly pushing Tracey and earning a laugh.

"No," Tracey replied, rolling his eyes. "In fact, I doubt many people would believe you if you came out to them. Even my gay-dar was a bit confused by you and it's usually dead on."

"Thanks, Trace," Gary replied sarcastically.

Ignoring the sarcasm, Tracey smiled. He knew his words probably gave Gary at least a little more confidence when it came to this particular topic. "You're welcome."

Once they were done, they returned to the lab again and made quick work of cleaning the food bowls, leaving them on the counter to dry so that they could consider their work for the day done. Seeing that May was still gone, they snacked on left over pizza on the back porch despite the warm weather. The whole day had been hot and the temperature dropping a few degrees in the early evening had done rather little in cooling off the small town.

Within a few minutes Tracey had his sketchbook out and was drawing the view of the back yard. Though a bit bored, Gary watched, somewhat amused at how quickly and easily Tracey could become absorbed in his drawing. An odd noise caused him to look up in time to see Umbreon push the back door open with her snout and slip out on to the porch. She walked past the table, rubbed her head against Gary's leg once and trotted off towards the pool. She sat at the edge of the shallow end and carefully reached her paw in to test the water while Gary shook his head, trying not to laugh at her. She could be so odd sometimes.

Umbreon looked up at her trainer and twitched her long ears before looking back at the pool. She backed away from the edge a good distance, walking out into the grass before turning and running towards the pool once more. With a flying leap, she landed a good distance from the edge of the pool, swam towards the steps, and climbed out, ready to do it again. Laughing at her antics, Gary reached down to pull off his socks and shoes. Across from him, Tracey turned the page in his sketchbook, ready to sketch the dark canine. Before he could begin his next drawing, Gary reached out and gently tugged the sketchbook out of his hands.

"Come on, Tracey, be fun for once," he teased, pulling his shirt off and tossing it on his chair.

"What are you doing?" Tracey asked warily as the younger teen stripped down to just his boxers. He fought not to blush as he glanced Gary over.

"Swimming," Gary replied simply.

"You do know you have about half a dozen bathing suits for that, right?" Tracey asked, standing up to reach over the table to retrieve his sketchbook from where Gary had placed it out of his reach a moment earlier. Taking advantage of Tracey standing, Gary grasped his wrist and dragged him away from the table towards the pool. "I'm not going swimming in my underwear, Gary," Tracey complained, trying to grab the table to keep the other boy from dragging him closer to the pool.

Gary let go of his wrist and caused Tracey to stumble a bit closer to the pool. "Who says you have to swim in your underwear?" he asked.

Tracey tried to make a move for the table but Gary grabbed his arm again, deftly slipped his hand into Tracey's pocket to grab the boy's cell phone, and tossed it on the table. "Gary, don't you dare!" He tried to wriggle out of Gary's grasp but the other boy laughed and tightened his grip, somehow managing to drag him to the edge of the pool.

Umbreon jumped into the pool again, splashing them both, and Gary took advantage of Tracey's surprise and pushed him into the water before diving in next to him. Tracey emerged from the water sputtering and coughing but laughing at the same time as Gary popped up across the pool from him.

"Why would you do that?" Tracey asked, still laughing as Gary swam towards him.

"For fun." Tracey scowled playfully at him, crossing his arms self-consciously across his chest. The move wasn't lost on Gary and he rolled his eyes when he reached him. "Oh, come on, you look good wet," he said, reaching out and uncrossing Tracey's arms. "Relax, Trace!"

Tracey sighed and reached down in the water to pull off his soaked shoes. "How many times have I told you to do just that over the last year?" he asked irritably.

"Yeah, well, it worked, didn't it?" Gary asked, leaning against the side of the pool next to him. He rested his arms against the pool edge behind him and closed his eyes, relaxing in the cool water. His fingers brushed against Tracey's wet shirt but neither boy moved away.

Tracey tossed his shoes on the deck surrounding the pool before tugging off his shirt and shorts, stripping down to just his boxers. Gary couldn't help but sneak a peek out of the corner of his eye as Tracey tossed his clothes on the deck next to his shoes. The other boy squirmed slightly and Gary knew that Tracey had somehow known he was looking.

"I told you, you look good wet."

"You're a terrible flirt," Tracey replied dryly, swimming across the pool to the other side.

Gary quickly followed him. "I wasn't flirting, I was telling the truth." He reached out and grabbed Tracey's wrist again, lowering his voice a bit. "Though if you _want _me to flirt with you, I could."

Giving up on his attempt to appear annoyed, Tracey laughed and moved slightly closer to Gary. "And what makes you think I would be interested?" he asked teasingly.

"Well, we're both soaked and in our underwear so…"

Tracey snorted in amusement, rolling his eyes a bit. "That sounds like dialogue for a bad lesbian porn," he commented.

Gary gave a short laugh and released Tracey's wrist, swimming away a bit. "And you say _I'm_ a terrible flirt! Although I guess you're right." He narrowed his eyes suddenly and regarded Tracey with a strange look. "What's your experience with lesbian porn in first place?"

Tracey cringed at the question and Gary laughed again. "Very awkward circumstances involving my brother," he replied slowly, rubbing the back of his neck as he watched Gary approach him once again. The boy never seemed to stay still for long. "What about you?"

"Very awkward circumstances involving my friends."

Both boys rolled their eyes and were quiet for a few minutes, relaxing in the water for some time. Gary continued to swim back and forth across the pool, dodging Umbreon's periodic running leaps into the pool. He could almost swear she was trying to land on him. Tracey rested against the side of the pool, occasionally petting Umbreon when she swam by or splashing Gary mischievously whenever he came up for air close by. Eventually Gary grew tired of dodging Umbreon and decided to relax against the side of the pool like Tracey.

The older boy appeared to be in deep thought about something and Gary took advantage of his distraction to splash him in the face. "What are you thinking about?" he asked after Tracey retaliated with a splash of his own.

The small smile that had been on Tracey's face faded with the question. "If May does her usual thing," he began seriously and Gary closed his eyes, knowing the question that was coming. "Are you going to get drunk with your friends?"

Gary groaned and ran a hand through his hair. "I don't know," he said after a minute. "If I tell you no and something happens later on and I end up doing something stupid, I would feel really bad for breaking a promise to you."

The response surprised Tracey and he titled his head curiously, considering the boy in front of him. "Why is that?"

"Well, you've become one of my best friends, you know. And you've done a lot for me. It would be pretty shitty of me to make a promise to you and then break it."

Tracey smiled faintly but remained serious. "You've been doing really well since you got back from the Islands. I don't want to see you screw that up," he said honestly.

Gary sighed and nodded. "I know," he replied quietly. "I don't want to screw it up either."

"Then why am I worried that you might do that?"

"Because that's exactly what I've been doing for the last ten months," Gary said softly. Tracey nodded in agreement and Gary had to resist the urge to roll his eyes at him. "It's not going to happen again."

"That sounds an awful lot like a promise to me," Tracey pointed out and Gary sighed again.

He thought a moment before fixing Tracey with an even stare. "I guess it is."

It was at that moment that May's car could be heard pulling into the driveway, followed by the familiar sound of the girl laughing with her best friend. The sound of the two girls giggling was followed by the sound of Darren's voice, apparently irritable about being left to carry everything out of the car. Gary dropped his gaze from Tracey, biting his lip as Umbreon swam another lap around the pool before climbing out and running excitedly around the side of the house to greet the new arrivals.

Gary moved past Tracey to climb out of the pool, only to have the other boy catch his arm before he could do so.

"Don't worry about your friends," Tracey said softly. "You'll be fine," he added and without really thinking, leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss against Gary's cheek. "Maybe that'll encourage you to be good," he said, releasing Gary's arm and climbing out of the pool, leaving the younger teen speechless as he gathered his soaked clothes and headed inside.

…. … …


	17. Chapter 16

**Secrets Kept**

Hey, a somewhat non-delayed update! Lol! I guess that's what being unemployed does to you; gives you time to write fanfiction stories… That sounds pathetic for a college graduate who turns twenty-five in less than a week. Oh well!

Thanks to everyone who has been reviewing! If you've read _Secrets Told,_ you know that our two boys have to get together sooner or later, but we've still got a little while to go, or do we? ;) We'll just have to wait and see!

Chapter 16

Ten minutes following Tracey's unexpected kiss, Gary found himself still in the pool, even as May, Amanda, and Darren filled the refrigerator with beer and lined the counter with various alcohols. He had no idea what to think about what Tracey had done and found himself in a strange sort of mental state where he was vaguely numb with surprise, but simultaneously inexplicably happy. If he had more guts when it came to his sexuality, he would go upstairs and kiss Tracey on the lips. Maybe, if he were really bold, he would ask the other boy out… Or at least make out with him.

A bit embarrassed by that particular train of thought, Gary took a deep breath and slipped under the water. He pushed off from the wall and swam to the other side, turning and returning to his original place before surfacing for another breath. In the brief moment he was above the water, he heard another car pull into the driveway, likely Wyatt's junky pickup truck, judging by the clanking noises the vehicle made. Taking another breath, Gary slipped under the water again and savored the way the cool liquid felt against his skin after the long day of working with Tracey. This time he was able to stay under a bit longer before surfacing and repeating the motion in an attempt to get Tracey off of his mind.

Sooner or later, he would have to suck it up and talk to Tracey about the feelings that had been gradually growing stronger, but today was not the day for that. At the very least, he would have to wait until his grandfather was back so that they wouldn't have to work alone together if talking to Tracey turned their friendship awkward. Then again, if that did happen with his grandfather around, the older man would certainly notice the difference in their friendship and would likely ask about the reasoning behind it. That would be even more awkward. Gary groaned in frustration, pushing off of the pool wall with more effort than was really necessary.

Maybe he would have to wait until he was about to go away for a week or so; that way, if things went awkwardly, the two boys would have time away from each other to let it pass.

He groaned again, feeling a bit helpless as he surfaced for another breath. All of this swimming was doing little to calm him down. If anything, it was keeping his mind on the issue, rather than distracting him, and he was growing more frustrated by the second. Part of him wished he could just forget about how flirtatious their friendship had become. Another part of him wished the friendship could grow into something more.

A third part of him wished there was another person he could talk to about the dilemma he was facing and perhaps give him new insight. Of course, doing that would involve coming out of the closet to at least one other person and, despite the numerous times he had nearly told Darren in the last month alone, he knew he simply was not ready for that step yet.

If he wasn't ready to do that, then how could he even consider taking his relationship with Tracey further?

He finally surfaced for the last time and swam over to the steps, sitting there quietly. His arcanine, who had taken to lying in the grass sometime over the last few minutes, came over and sat on the deck close enough for Gary to reach out and pet him. The large fire dog stepped a bit closer and rubbed his nose against Gary's shoulder, despite the water that was dripping off of him. The back door opened behind him after a few minutes and he heard footsteps on the deck but ignored whoever it was.

The next thing Gary knew, something soft and fluffy had been dropped on his head, leaving him blinking in the sudden darkness. He rolled his eyes and pulled the towel off his head to glare up at Wyatt, who grinned and held out a bottle of beer.

"I'm not getting trashed tonight," Gary said flatly.

"You can't get drunk off one beer," Wyatt sighed, sitting down at the edge of the pool with his bare feet in the water. "How's work in the lab going?"

"Fine," Gary replied quietly, giving in and taking the beer from his friend. "I need to clean the lake tomorrow. Are you going to help or are you planning on being too hung over for that?"

Wyatt took a long drink from his beer. "I'll help you," he agreed, "but you have to go surfing with me in the morning."

Gary groaned, drinking his own drink. "How early?"

Wyatt shrugged, drinking again. "Not early."

"Real specific," Gary muttered sarcastically. Wyatt chuckled in response, enjoying the fact that he was annoying the other teen.

The boys fell quiet, sipping their drinks for a few minutes and lost in their own thoughts. After contemplating the whole Tracey situation for quite some time, Gary drained the rest of his drink and glanced over at Wyatt. At that moment, May came outside with two more bottles in her hands. Gary hesitated for a moment but took a second beer from her anyway. The sun hadn't even begun to set yet; if a second beer somehow managed to get him drunk, he would be able to sober up in time to go to bed. No harm, no foul. With that thought in mind, Gary quickly drained over half of his second drink in a series of quick gulps.

Next to him, Wyatt laughed. "Thirsty?" Gary held up his middle finger to him and drained the rest of the drink. "You know, they say dehydration is the number one cause of heat stroke," Wyatt replied before titling his head back and draining his own bottle in one go.

"Oh, fuck off," Gary said, rolling his eyes and reaching over to hit the other boy in the back of the head.

Wyatt laughed again, shoving Gary's shoulder before lying down on the deck, keeping his feet in the water. He saw May in the kitchen behind them and waved to get her attention, holding up his and Gary's empty bottles. She rolled her eyes but retrieved two more bottles from the fridge and brought them out to the boys with a warning to slow down on the booze.

A few minutes later, Gary was starting to feel the alcohol affecting him just a bit. He had been too busy throughout the day to eat much and it was making it far easier for him to feel even the relatively small amount of alcohol in two and a half beers. Despite feeling the alcohol, Tracey was still on his mind and he groaned in frustration again.

"Can I ask you a question?" he asked Wyatt suddenly.

The other boy sighed. "As long as it's not about my parents," he muttered darkly.

Gary frowned slightly, turning to face him. "The divorce is going that badly, huh?"

"That counts as a question."

"What would you do if there was someone you really liked but couldn't date?"

Wyatt snorted and shook his head. "You're asking the guy who got his ass beat for sleeping with one of his best friends' sisters and then started dating said sister. Are you drunk?" He asked incredulously.

Gary rolled his eyes and stood up, draping his towel around his shoulders. "Good point," he replied, gathering his clothing from the table. "I shouldn't have asked you."

Wyatt laughed, picking up their drinks and following Gary. "If you like this chick that badly, ask her out, you pussy."

"And if there's a legitimate reason not to ask them?" Gary asked as they headed into the kitchen.

Wyatt's grin faded suddenly and his eyes narrowed at Gary. "You're not talking about Amanda, are you?"

"Oh yeah, I really want _your_ sloppy seconds," Gary shot back, rolling his eyes again.

"Not Amanda then?"

"No," Gary sighed. "Trust me, she's not my type."

"Good."

... ... ...

For the second day in a row, Gary woke up to the obnoxious beeping of his alarm clock far earlier than he would have liked. Granted it was six in the morning, as opposed to five, but he had been up late with his friends again. Though he hadn't drank enough to get drunk, he was still tired and he had to drag himself out of bed. Wyatt had agreed to help him with his work in the lake only if he went surfing with him. Though the other boy had said they wouldn't go out early, there really wasn't much choice in the matter. He couldn't go in the afternoon because he had work in the lab and he couldn't go that evening because he would likely be too tired.

He slipped out of his room quietly, grabbing the board shorts and rash guard that he had left on top of his dresser as he went. After dressing, he headed downstairs to where he knew Wyatt was still fast asleep on the couch. He reached over the back of the couch, yanked Wyatt's pillow out from under his head, and pushed the other boy off of the couch.

"Get up, asshole," he said, walking past the couch and towards the kitchen.

"Dude... You're such a dick. I said not early!" Wyatt complained but still climbed off the floor and staggered towards the kitchen after Gary.

"Hung over?" Gary asked, pouring himself a glass of orange juice.

"No. You said you would beat the shit out me if I got trashed," Wyatt groaned, rubbing his face tiredly.

Gary nodded, smirking slightly at his friend, happy that he had listened. "That's because you have to help me later. You wanted to go surfing," he reminded his friend.

"Yeah, yeah, I remember. You're driving, I'm fucking tired."

"Whatever," Gary rolled his eyes and headed into the garage to grab his surfboard.

By the time they reached the beach, it was after six-thirty and the sun was just rising. They had been delayed by how long it took Wyatt to change into his board shorts and attach his board to the roof of Gary's car. Gary had been annoyed with him before they had even left the house but, upon seeing the favorable conditions, he decided it wasn't really worth being annoyed. The water was clear, fairly warm, and relatively calm with the waves breaking evenly, on the small side but just big enough to have fun. It was going to be a beautiful day.

Wyatt, typical to his rash nature, whooped and ran into the water, suddenly far more awake than he had been only a moment earlier. Gary shook his head, amused, as he entered the water much calmer than his friend.

"Is it just me, or doesn't the water seem warmer than normal?" Gary called, paddling out to meet Wyatt in the deeper water. He had only been out to the beach once or twice since coming home from the Orange Islands, but hadn't been out in nearly two weeks now.

"Oh, sorry 'bout that," Wyatt called back, grinning. Gary rolled his eyes at the joke. "It's a few degrees warmer than usual for this time of year," he confirmed, abandoning his failed joke.

"That means more fish."

Wyatt nodded, still grinning. "And more sharks. There was a sand tiger yesterday, big as my board!"

Gary smiled at his excitement. "I dove with a few sand tigers down by Valencia."

"Eh, they're common… I heard some of the fishermen talking about a hammerhead out by the reef a few days ago."

"Dove with one of those too." Gary grinned at the other boy's loud curse and jealous expression.

"Arceus!" Wyatt viciously splashed Gary, who merely laughed and ducked his head to avoid getting saltwater in his eyes. "You're such an ass!"

"The privileges of being a researcher," Gary replied smugly.

Wyatt opened his mouth to reply but caught sight of an approaching wave out of the corner of his eye. "Race you!" he yelled, starting to paddle toward the shore, purposely splashing Gary in the process.

"Oh yeah, and I'm the ass?" Gary shot back, paddling to catch up.

"You look like one," Wyatt called, popping up on his board just before the wave broke, shooting another grin over his shoulder at Gary as he followed suit.

"That's not what your girlfriend thinks!"

Wyatt's laugh echoed across the water as he carved into the wave with a series of small turns. Gary only rode the wave about halfway to shore before turning and paddling back out to their original spot while Wyatt kept going.

"I win," he said cheerfully when Wyatt reached him again,

"Cheater," Wyatt splashed him again, earning an eye roll in response. "So, privileges of a researcher, eh?"

Gary closed his eyes and shook his head, knowing exactly where this was going. He purposely hadn't spent much time hanging out alone with Wyatt to avoid the conversation, in hopes that the boy would forget about it. "No, I didn't sleep with anyone," he interjected shortly.

"Aw, but-"

"When are you going to get it through your head that I'm not in this just to get laid?"

"You know, if you don't start getting somewhere with girls, people are gonna start thinking you're gay," Wyatt retorted with his usual impish grin.

Gary wasn't sure whether to laugh or roll his eyes, or react in some different way entirely. "What if I was?" he instead asked curiously, somehow managing to keep his voice light, almost joking.

Wyatt laughed loudly in response, clearly thinking it _was_ a joke. "Get real, Gary! This is _you_ we're talking about!" He glanced over his shoulder, caught sight of another approaching wave, and grinned again. "No cheating this time," he said, starting to paddle in to catch the wave.

For some reason, the words stung and Gary stayed put, letting the wave pass under his board without even attempting to paddle in. He had suddenly lost the desire to surf for the day. Closing his eyes, his tried to remind himself that his friend had just been joking but it didn't make the words sting any less.

Sighing softly, he slid off of his board and into the water, opening his eyes once he was under. The visibility was remarkably clear and he could easily see fish swimming all around the small rocks on the bottom of the ocean. Off to one direction, he could see the familiar outline of a Staryu in the distance. In another direction was the silhouette of a sea turtle. There was a soft crunching sound nearby and Gary turned to see a decent sized nurse shark eating a small Shellder a few meters away. Unfazed by the placid shark species' presence, he surfaced for a breath. He could see Wyatt paddling back out to him but slipped back under the water before the other boy could say anything. This time he swam down to the rocks, peering into the crevices to find various crabs and fish hiding here and there.

A slapping sound echoed from above him and Gary looked up to see Wyatt's board next to his own. He had clearly slapped either the board or the water to get Gary's attention.

"We're here to surf, not to look at the fish," Wyatt whined as soon as Gary surfaced.

"I like looking at the fish," Gary defended, knowing he sounded at least a little bit childish. "There's a nurse shark on the bottom."

"I can see it from here; nothing special. Let me know when you spot a hammerhead down there."

"Yeah, yeah; go back to surfing, you pain in the ass," Gary shot back at him, diving back under the water. He swam around the back of Wyatt's board in order to avoid the fin of the board should the boy decide to catch a wave while he was under. Struck by an idea, he swam under Wyatt's board and pressed his hands against the bottom, shoving upwards and flipping it over with his friend still on it.

Wyatt, unsurprisingly, surfaced amid sputtering and cursing. "You son of a bitch!" he exclaimed, heaving an armful of water towards Gary, who was laughing at what he considered his revenge for Wyatt's earlier comment.

"You could see the shark on the bottom, but you couldn't see me right under you?" Gary asked, climbing back on his board.

Their brotherly bickering was interrupted by an approaching wave, which they both paddled in to catch, only to be resumed as they paddled back out to their spot. They continued like this for nearly an hour until Gary saw a silhouette in the water that made his breath catch in his throat for a second. Only a few feet away, Wyatt froze on his board, having seen the same exact thing.

"Oi, scientist, is that a – "

"Tiger shark," Gary confirmed, watching as the large shark's dorsal fin broke the surface only a short distance away from them. He had felt nervous the first time he had dove into the water with Professor Birch near the sharks in the Orange Islands, but that was only a fraction of the nerves he felt now. "We should go in," he suggested, glancing at Wyatt, who, for once, was silent.

The blonde boy nodded and they both started paddling back in, careful not to splash too much, lest they attract the attention of a shark that was easily twice as long as either teenager was tall. Once they were in the shallows, they stood and trudged through the water, suddenly laughing at the sense of danger they had felt in the water. Having come so close to such a large and potentially dangerous predator, they both felt a reckless sense of teenage invincibility and laughed all the harder for it, both excitedly talking about the shark between laughs. They carelessly attached their boards on the roof with bungee cords, not at all caring about the sand and water that dripped into the interior of the roof-less Jeep as they headed back into town, heading first towards the bakery downtown for breakfast before returning to the lab. They both picked out breakfast sandwiches and sodas for themselves and a dozen bagels for anyone else who was at the house, then, on a complete whim, Gary ordered a third sandwich and an iced coffee for Tracey. Wyatt shot him a strange look at the sudden addition to their order but Gary shrugged it off.

"Trace always covers for me when I screw up around the lab," Gary said, taking a sip of his Mountain Dew. "The least I can do is get him breakfast." He also loved seeing the grateful smile that always spread across Tracey's face whenever he picked him up something while he was out. Usually it was just something small like a sandwich or a few slices of pizza, but he occasionally noticed when Tracey's current sketchbook was low on blank pages and would pick one up on his way home from school.

With how much the pokemon watcher did for him on a daily basis – the patient listening, the constant advice, and indeed, the occasional covering for a missed chore in the lab because Gary had been drunk at a friend's house the night before – Gary could certainly spare a few dollars here and there to make it up to him. Wyatt could shoot him all the questioning glances he wanted, but at the end of the day, Tracey deserved it. And seeing that smile could make Gary's entire day. Quite simply, it was well worth it.

Gary headed straight to the lab when they returned to the house, managing to balance his and Tracey's breakfast and drinks in his arms despite Umbreon, Arcanine, Marill, Venonat, and May's annoying little meowth, Pookie, all flocking to him the instant he walked in with food. Somehow he made it into the lab without either dropping food or losing a sandwich to a hungry pokemon. Tracey was standing at the window, gazing out at the ranch, body posture tense, when Gary entered the lab but he smiled when he saw the five pokemon surrounding him and begging for food. Wordlessly, Gary handed over the sandwich and coffee before plopping down at his desk nearby with his own breakfast.

Marill, Venonat, and Pookie instantly surrounded Tracey while the two canines sat before Gary, Umbreon raising her paw and whimpering softly with enormous scarlet eyes and Arcanine nudging Gary's leg with his snout and giving a soft, expectant growl. Gary rolled his eyes at the two high-level pokemon and turned his attention to Tracey, who smiled faintly and thanked him. He couldn't help but notice that Tracey's smile didn't reach his eyes.

"What's wrong?" Gary asked, washing down a bite of bacon-egg-and-cheese-on-a-bagel with his soda.

Tracey sipped his coffee quietly, clearly deep in thought as he swallowed his most recent bite. "Scyther's not doing well," he said softly.

Gary frowned; glancing down at his own pokemon, he couldn't help but feel bad for his friend. Scyther was incredibly old for a pokemon and had constant problems that were always trying for Tracey and Gary couldn't imagine how he would feel in the same situation with one of his own pokemon. "Diabetes again?" he asked. At least half of the large arthropod's issues over the last year were due to what the professor had diagnosed as pokemon diabetes.

"That and he's not eating… I think he might have another kidney infection," Tracey sighed. He suddenly seemed to have little appetite and broke off three pieces from his sandwich and handed one to each of the pokemon surrounding him.

"I'm sorry," Gary mumbled. Seeing the other pokemon being given food, Arcanine and Umbreon gave him reproachful looks. Umbreon whined even louder and Arcanine gave him a particularly hard nudge with his nose. "You two are pathetic!" Gary exclaimed in frustration, finally giving in and giving each of them a piece of his sandwich. "No more," he snapped at the two canines, holding up his empty hands to show them that he had no more food. "I guess we'll have to give him the usual treatment," he suggested, returning his gaze to Tracey, who nodded in response.

"He'll be okay with some insulin and antibiotics; he's still got some fight left in him," Tracey said quietly.

"That's good to hear," Gary murmured. At that moment, Wyatt entered the lab loudly, leaving the door to slam shut behind him while Gary and Tracey both rolled their eyes at his entrance.

"So, full SCUBA gear, or mask and snorkel?" he asked, oblivious to the serious feel in the air.

"Mask and snorkel; it's just some hair algae," Gary replied, not looking away from Tracey. "You want to go get the gear for me? I'll meet you at the lake when I'm done in here," he said, finally glancing over at his friend, who scowled in response but headed outside anyway. Once he was gone, Gary stood and walked over to Tracey, placing his hands on the other boy's shoulders and rubbing at the tension in Tracey's muscles. "You okay?"

Tracey nodded his head, closing his eyes for a moment and relaxing under Gary's touch. "I'm fine," he sighed. "It's just kind of hard, you know… With your grandfather being gone, and May trying to throw parties all the time, and being away from my family. I know it's not like Scyther can help it, I just kind of wish he could've gotten sick while your grandfather was here and I didn't have so much to do." He turned slightly to peer up at Gary, who met his eyes with a sympathetic smile.

"I'll take care of your stuff today," Gary replied easily, reaching out to brush some stray strands of hair from Tracey's face.

"You don't have to do that, Gary."

"I want to. It's not a big deal," Gary insisted. "Just let me take care of the lake and then you can spend as much time as you want with Scyther. Darren and Wyatt are already here, they can help me with the rest. Take the rest of the day off."

Tracey opened his mouth to decline the offer but Gary shot him a stern look that he couldn't help but smile at. "Thanks, Gary," he finally conceded softly.

"No problem," Gary replied. He hesitated slightly, biting his lip, before leaning in suddenly and pressing a small kiss against Tracey's cheek. He pulled away quickly, blushing furiously as he headed towards the door, leaving with one quick glance at Tracey to see a faint but silly grin on his face, which was almost as red as Gary's. Clearing his throat and running a hand through his hair, Gary bit his lip again, trying to keep his own stupid grin from forming as he strolled across the grass towards the large man-made lake.

… … …


End file.
